Things do get better šŸ„°

Losing a partner
21

@jody

What a good way to look at that, Iā€™m going to use that! Anyway you take care :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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22

Totally agree- a good way to look at things.

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23

Thanks Katy you too :heart:

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24

Hi been feeling so sorry for my self the last few weeks , in my second year now finding very hard . We were married for almost 50 yrs and feels like Iā€™ve lost half my self . So I decided to reach out and I came across the post saying it does get better . I look back and realise it is better than the early days . Iā€™m able to function much better than I did and my husband would say you are getting better itā€™s always going to be hard but you carry on and live your life for me as well as yourself .thank you all for your positive posts . We can do this x

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25

Sounds so positive and encouraging thank you :pray::crossed_fingers:x

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26

Thank you. Thatā€™s really helpful and encouraging xx

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27

Iā€™m so pleased for you that youā€™re in such a good place now. You are still very young and you have a long future ahead of you. I sincerely hope that you can find a future that works out for you.

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28

I lost my husband in May after a traumatic fight with cancer. I wasnā€™t ready for how painful the grief would be but it occurred to me this weekend that sadness is not something we embrace or are used to. So Iā€™m trying hard to accept my grief and make it something positive, I enjoyed reading your post and I thank you for sharing. I hope that there is light in the future and that the loneliness will subside.
Gill

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29

I lost David on the 14th May, i am starting to get back ib to liiving again, i have joined jollie dollies and met some other widows through that and we go out for lunch and coffee. I have been out fir walks and other outings with family. It does help a lot as posting on here does. I still feel lonely and very sad and dissapointed but it is not as intense. We will always miss our loved one we just need to build our lives around the grief. But getting back out there with others is a good way back. X

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@Elite Thank you for saying that. I honestly couldnā€™t see any light at the end of the tunnel at 6 months in. I had the odd good day, but I would regularly feel awful and like it had just happened all over again - it was a vicious circle. I am SO much better now. Of course Iā€™ll never be the same person, I miss him every day, but the sense of awful hopelessness has gone. I know this isnā€™t the same for everyone and that we all take different times to start to come out of the fog, and to varying degrees, but there is hope. I know we will meet again and I know he would want me to live my life and enjoy all those experiences he isnā€™t able to. He wouldnā€™t want me to lock myself away. As I wouldnā€™t have wanted him to had I gone first. Day to day now, I talk to him, I know he is with me and I know he will be waiting for me when it is my turn. Iā€™m sure it is the same for you. Just acknowledge that if you have a really bad day, that it is natural and normal. Much better to get the grief out than to bottle it all up. Realise that the love you had has gone nowhere. Nothing can change what you had.

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31

Oh @Dublingirl,
Thank you for kind words.
Feeling a bit rubbish at the mo as having a buy of a bit after the 6 months mark last week.
Always busy but honestly just going through the motions sometimes.
I will give myself a talking too and think of yr positive and comforting words.
Sending love
Ellie

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32

@Annde

Thank you šŸ©·

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33

@Gill9

I hope things start getting better for youā€¦itā€™s kinda like all of a sudden you get an epiphany moment, itā€™s really strange! Itā€™s like I want to go see New things and get motivated again, learn who I am again :smiling_face_with_three_hearts::smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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34

Hi I have been reading yours and other posts in this thread. Just after my husbsnd died and many months after i used to think I wanted to die. Not that I would ever contemplate doing anything but those thoughts of wanting to be where he was were there a lot of the time. Although I know I will never get over him dying, I have realised there is a future. I donā€™t know how to get there yet because I donā€™t feel as though I fit in anywhere now. But I will have to keep trying. Iā€™ll do it for him and my family and most of all for me.X

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35

@penny6

Iā€™m sorry for your loss.

Thank you for those reassuring words. Its exactly one month today since I lost my husband suddenly, so I was having a bad day and reading your post comforted me somewhat x

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36

One monthā€¦so early in your grief you will still be raw, but reading these posts will help you and reassure you that we do get better with time. X

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37

Hi Katyh, I also found Sundays so long and lonely but last Sunday I went to a Meet Up group. It was called Friends and Coffee. The group meet twice a month on a Sunday afternoon in Glasgow just for coffee and a chat. It was basically a wide variety of ages - people on their own, some had lost partners but not all. I enjoyed a relaxed couple of hours chatting. They meet in a hotel and everyone was so relaxed and friendly. I will certainly go again. It may be that looking at the Meet Up website may offer something in your area if you are interested.
Wishing you well.
Candy

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38

@Loobyloo2

I completely get you! Like you didnā€™t want to wake up! Whatā€™s the point! Iā€™m so happy you have decided to push through and make a new life for you ,šŸ©·šŸ„°šŸ©·šŸ„° keep going youā€™ll see the beauty again, itā€™ll just take time! Xxx

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Hi @Candy

Thank you! I may have a look at some point! Iā€™m quite happy at the moment plodding on šŸ©· and am enjoying doing things on my out, been out for some nice walks etc.

I did how ever had an emotional day at work yesterday, the first day since i was back, really struggled with actual tears, think it depends what time of the month it is! But yesterday was a hard day, the hard dayā€™s just pop around to remind us what we lost but I suppose we deal with it a lot better šŸ©· xxx

40

Having a particularly bad day today - trying to not cry but itā€™s overwhelming- made the mistake of looking through photos and now Iā€™m a mess - just over 7 months since my husband died suddenly - Iā€™m constantly grumpy with my mum who tries to help but I canā€™t stop feeling like sheā€™s still here and he isnā€™t - Iā€™ve been through recently good times and generally coping and now I feel like Iā€™m back to square one