So sorry for your loss.
We’re allowed to have bad days. I had an awful day yesterday. And I totally get it about being grumpy with your mum, I’m the same. No patience with anything or anyone!
Today is a better day for me. I took my dog out for a long walk - it helps to keep active. I stopped to chat to other dog owners walking their dogs. It felt good to talk to complete strangers who don’t know I’ve lost my husband and chat about completely different things other than my own grief (it’s 5 weeks for me today since my husband died)
We’re all here for you and each other.
Sending you big hugs.