Yesterday it was not too bad - just a few tears. Today I started crying immediately after getting up and I am still crying. I cannot help it. I just do not know what to do anymore. Is it self-pity, is it grief? A mix of both? And the sunshine makes it worse. I should go out in the garden or do something in the house but I am just sitting here crying. Am I the only one who has these feelings?
@Annaessex I have felt the same today and keep on crying. Some days I feel slightly better but today I am not so good. It isn’t self pity. It’s grief and deep sadness of missing our men and every day it is getting longer since we have seen our beautiful husband’s. Grief comes in waves and definitely having one of those days. Maybe try and do something to distract yourself. Call a friend or go for a walk. Easy said I know. I have just gone to work for a couple of hours. Though had a good scream in the car. Sending lots of love and hugs xx
No you’re not alone. On Monday I cried all day then the next two days were not as bad. Sometimes it just feels so bad it has to come out.
@Annaessex you are not alone. Some days you get through feeling a bit detached and a bit less emotional. Other days it’s an overwhelming feeling of sadness, dispair & anguish with all the tears. Hopefully as time goes on we have less days like this. Sending hugs.
No your not the only one. I had a bad yesterday crying a lot of the day .its not self pity its grief. Theres nothing wrong in crying .take it day by day
You/we are definitely not on our own . I popped out with my friend for an hour before. It’s hard especially to the shop me & Bry went to but I did it .
Yesterday I cried a few times, today I’ve got choked up a few times but managed to hold them back . In an hour I could be a whaling mess , I suppose we just have to go with it.
My friend said today if you think back how your were 7 weeks ago , you are doing better & you are functioning. That made me sad as if I’m doing better am I getting over Bry leaving me ?? I know I’m not but the guilt I feel on a not so bad day is almost as painful as the grief. It’s like a lose lose situation
I completely understand.
I don’t want to be okay. And I don’t want people to think I’m okay.
That’s why I don’t like people telling me I’m doing well, or I’m being strong.
It’s like they think I’m okay, or that I will be okay.
I’m not and I won’t ever be.
Sending you a lot of strength. You are not alone <3 I too am grieving the loss of my Mum, and I know how overwhelming the emotions can be.
Maybe it´s ok to let yourself cry, your body and spirit are obviously trying to process all your emotions. And at least it is all getting released from your body. Grief is a funny thing, I have found myself that it comes in waves. And sometimes it just smacks you down and catches you off guard. Try and find comfort in small things, look after yourself the way you´d look after a small child. I too am trying so hard not to be judgmental of myself. Even if you are experiencing self-pity it is your right to feel that way, you are grieving someone you love deeply.
Sending you a lot of love and strength x
No youre definately not … its grief and sadness and i dunno when it ends … i feel like im gonna cry forever xx
I seem to have gone back and seem worse .The last few days I’ve cried and cried.But hope I will then have a couple of good days.It’s nothing but a rollercoaster Afriend of Zeki was cremated today and I read this poem on his order of service I thought it was lovely.
I am I and you are you whatever we were to each other that we still are.
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight
Life means all that it ever meant it is the same as it ever was
Hugs xx to everybody
I know !! Me neither
My boss messaged earlier offering ‘ help’ fir me to try to come to terms with it . I won’t EVER & don’t WANT to come to terms with it . I just want him back
Hugs to you too xxx
Love you for getting it like I do…
That’s it isn’t it WE DON’T WANT TO …
Don’t want to get used to it …
Don’t want to come terms to with it…
Don’t want yo smile (properly) …
Don’t want to do anything we used to that made us happy…
don’t want to feel okay even for a nano second…
Don’t want to be happy FULL STOP
Nobody but nobody that has not stood in our shoes can possibly understand.
(Do you understand ‘im happy with being sad’ - it’s about my bubble I’ve spoken about)
Lovely photos, Martyn2. So sorry for your loss.
Thank you so much
I certainly do understand . I sometimes pose a fake smile because it’s easier than explaining all the things you said above but NO IM NOT OK & I won’t be until I’m back with my Bry xxx
, I feel guilty if I stop being sad
Yeh i agree - it doesnt bother me being sad either cos that’s how i feel … i don’t mind being happy ( ish) sometimes but it never lasts … i usually end up in tears at some point afterwards anyway and the yearning for him to be here comes back whether im happy or sad i just miss him in every way and i wish i hadnt lost him … gone too soon xx
Woke up with tears streaming down my face just now. Having to force myself to do things most days now
Yeh i woke up sad too … i look over where he would be sleeping and wish he hadnt gone its ok to cry martyn - let the sadness out x