My lovely partner Paul died two weeks ago of a heart attack, he was 57.
The A4 photo for his funeral arrived today and I could hardly look at it, I’ve been sofa bound since. I’m finding these early days frightening. Grief does not settle, and learning to live with it seems impossible one minute, then it just lands in me, completely unprepared.
Hi Liliput
So sorry to hear of your sad loss. I can fully understand how you are feeling. and know the pain and suffering you are going through.
All we can hope is that time does heal.
Sorry for your loss.
Every day is a struggle, I get up late and cannot be bothered to do anything, life seems pointless without my partner, he is on my mind 24/7. He was my best friend, we always joked about with each other, I really miss him, I can’t see me having a life without him, it is going to be a bleak future as I adored him.
I try to watch TV in the evening but I have to try really hard to concentrate on the TV.
The emotions are like being on a rollercoaster.
I done food shop yesterday and all of a sudden cried, but really trying to hold it in in case others noticed.
Sending you a hug
Amy x
Amy. I feel exactly the same no concentration-can’t listen to music - have an anxiety or an ache in my stomach all the time. Last year I was running a home for my husband and son. My son has moved out and my husband died in his sleep. Life is empty empty empty. I make an effort to walk and cook as son says with me to help me through but I hate knowing he needs to move on to his own life. Wish we could all meet up and help each other it won’t bring back our loved ones but we wouldn’t feel so alone. Please take care Amy I hope time will help us all although pain will never be far away.
Oh bubba I know what you mean it seems like an unnecessary function to cook and eat doesn’t it. I am eating as my son is temporarily with me to ensure I cook eat and walk Life seems agony waking up seems agony going to bed and sleeping seems agony but I know my lovely husband wouldn’t want me to wither away nor would my family snd I’m sure it’s the same for you. Please please take care your husband would want you to as well as yr family snd friends.
My family keep an eye on me. They have their own little families. I feel a burden. Who wants mother in law keep popping round? My heart is empty. Ive lost my soul mate. I cant imagine life going on without him. I can feel him around me but cant touch him. Sounds crazy but thats how it is. Cant bear going out and leaving him. I feel so broken. I loved hi. So much. What sort of retirement have i got to look forward to now? Lonely. I think i want to stay working but what’s the point when they clobber you for tax. I dont know what to do. Cant sleep, cant eat much, canr focus without him. Life is pointless without him. X
I totally understand everything u r feeling. Life can feel pointless and empty. I do suffer morning anxiety which wakes me up like a hammer to the stomach I don’t think there is a magic cure it’s because we loved them so much that it hurts so much. Hysteria and loneliness is my common friend unfortunately. I still see my husband dead in bed which efforts everything!!! Take care x
I was the same Merrin when my Ron passed. I broke my heart looking at the enlarged photo I chose to go on his coffin. It was over 2 yrs ago and I now have it on the wall. I kiss it every night before I go to bed. I hope things ease a little for you soon. I am thinking of you.
That must be awful memory. I hope things improve for you. My husba d died in hospital with coronavirus which he caught in there. I got to spend literally 10 mins with him before he passed away. I am so lost. I tell my children what they want to hear, yes im eating, yes im sleeping etc. But im Not. Its so awful for everyone on here. I also get that punch in the stoma h everytime i look at him. Take care. Stay safe. X
I’m sorry for your loss. I too lost my husband yesterday he was in his for cancer been in 3 weeks negative covid tests then a call to say he has had a positive test caught on the ward. He was due to be discharged this week passed yesterday morning I managed to get a hour. Just 60 we had so many plans. Only diagnosed 1st Feb.
Im so sorry for your loss. It leaves a big gaping hole in your heart. Talking on here helps to express how you are feeling, and we are all suffering in the same way. Life is crap for me now. I love my children but without mel its not the same, nor ever will be xx
Ditto Merrin my darling husband died on February 17th and his funeral was last Friday. Now the funeral is over, I just feel lost. I cannot imagine my life without him and despite having 3 amazing sons, I don’t want to be a burden for anyone. I just can’t believe he’s gone forever. Sx