Two weeks of widowhood.

Losing a partner
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Evening everyone,
Im sorry Mbg and Martin. Sorry you are on here.
It’s 46 weeks for me
My husband had a whole cupboard full of spices which I’ve kept and he absolutely adored. When you open that cupboard door the smell is amazing. We forget how Evocative many things can be and remind us of the smell of a person. They say it’s one of the very first senses that we get and here we were all talking about perfumes and how important they were to our memories. But spices in particular cinnamons which my husband loved. Make me think about him.

I met with a counsellor today and she was talking about how important it is to recognise two different types of days. Those days she called the days of loss which she said she should lead into and cry and do all those important things and the days of restoration I recognise that in all of us.
Thinking of your grandson, Georgie.
This is an interesting thing. And I’ve had some faith that sometimes in my life and no faith at other times in my life they did a study at the hospital in Edinburgh. They had three groups of people patients who were prayed for and knew they were prayed for, patients who were prayed for but didn’t know they were prayed for and patients that weren’t prayed for at all And supposedly the outcome was this those who will pray for and knew they were prayed for made best progress, those who were prayed for even though they didn’t know they were prayed for made next best progress.
So I made a decision one to greatly accept any prayers that were offered to me and two to pray to whoever whatever might be out there In order to help Others even through my current disbelief in God.

That said tomorrow will be celebrating my last day of radiotherapy and I’m gonna ring that bell - so you guys think of me about 9:30 tomorrow morning and listen carefully cause, I’m telling you, you’re gonna hear that bell clanging from all over the world because I’m gonna clang it that loudly.

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2527

I will pray for you tonight KTG

Debsie some one told me about oracle cards habe you heard of them ? they are kind of like tarot cards but all positive you can use them if you have a decision to make . It may sound silly and not something i would usually entertain but ill try anything at the moment , along with now being a volunteer for the local cat protection , first time there and i was tempted to bring on home . I wonder how many ill end up with !

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I’m just watching the video of our wedding! So many not with us now, including family and friends.

First song I added into the video was the Mamas and Papas - This is dedicated to the one I love. After the ceremony, was The Reverend Al Green - Lets stay together. Then Barry White - Just the way you are, then Lionel Ritchie - Endless Love, Boris Gardener - I wanna wake up with you, The Style Council - You’re the best thing, and Leo Sayer - When I need you. Also reliving our honeymoon in Paris including the Eiffel tower and a boat trip down the Seine to Handel’s Water Music. What beautiful memories that brought back.

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Littleburty I haven’t heard of those cards I’ll take a look. I have often been tempted to learn Tarot cards though. Had a strange thing with cards when I was a teen. I used to play solitaire. This one time I was in a sort of dream state. I cut the cards and it was a queen. I cut them again, another queen, I cut them again another queen. At that point I realised what was happening and ‘woke’ the next cut wasn’t a queen. My nan said strange things that became true. I thought I had inherited her gift, but I never did it again.

I want to get a two cats and strangely enough our local cats protection have 2 pairs of bonded cats. I’m very tempted but really not sure if I am ready yet. Maybe your post is telling me something.

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Nigel my sister gave me a copy of my mums video of my wedding and her wedding. Parents, grandparents, uncles and aunts all gone. I keep meaning to show my boys so they know who these people are. Unfortunately my mum seemed to cut off our heads in most of our wedding, she was better at my sisters.

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Yes I’ve lost many Debsie including a niece by suicide, so it was a very poignant video. Also it was the day of the Hillsborough Disaster too. I’m going to get my kids all together and we can all laugh together!

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You have my prayers KtG! And I’m sure Mary and my MS friend would join me too! Go girl - you can smash this!

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Debsie, about 40 years ago before Mary and I got together, she went to a Tarot reading. The cards said she’d be happy soon with a man she already knew. They went through all her make friends including me. None fitted. She said definitely no to me as I was already married! Well the rest is history!

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Debsie you are 100% right about water! Strange thing is the water still hasn’t leaked anywhere! I’ll check again in the morning!

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Nigel, could it be a rusted out drip pan under the shower floor tile? Frozen then melted condensation?

Gosh, I don’t know where our wedding video is, but 1/3 of our guests are now gone too.

Debsie, a bonded pair is best. They can entertain one another when you must leave the house. Cats are great pets, they are very affectionate and loving and nothing sounds better than purring.

If you are having a problem making a decision between X or Y - take 2 sheets of paper, draw a line lengthwise down the middle of each, one column is “Pros” one is “Cons”. One sheet for each X or Y. See which one has more pros than cons. Rather than a swirl in your head, it is a visual.

KtG I will hear that bell all the way over here! Well done! Well DONE!

Jody, nice to know you are still reading here. We have done quite well, don’t you think? This group has kept me sane and given me a place to vent my true feelings without judgment, only compassion, empathy and tons of good advice.

Yes, I can barely wait for them to drive up in my new truck with an $857,000.00 cashier’s check made payable to me. I chose to remain anonymous and not have the cameras and balloons for a tv commercial. Gotta be safety conscious. Gees.

TAXES - finally, the CPA raised his brainy little head and let me know that we are paid up on taxes and no filing is due until April! I nearly bawled with relief. Y’all the Succession and the taxes are done!!! I can hardly believe it!

Tomorrow I will call the bank to set up an appointment with the finance guy there and deliver all the stuff he will need to change names on the accounts. I’ve already delivered that information to the other finance guy. Halfway there.

Then the SUV.

Then the house.

Then the land.

I have the rest of February and all of March off from the dreadful work! The rest will be easy.

A company is coming to re-glaze my kitchen sink in March.

It’s raining. I am cooking tonight. Baked chicken breasts and a side of spinach sauteed in olive oil, loads of garlic and feta.

What a nice feeling. The house is painted, the succession is done, the income taxes are paid, the home insurance and property taxes are paid, the new fence and gates are done, the car insurance is paid, the SUV is running, the A/C’s are chilling, chicken is baking in the oven and I have 7 weeks free to do whatever before the tax many cometh again.

It’s been a wild 21 week ride, but I got here. Honestly, I never thought I would crawl out of that avalanche of extra duties, paperwork, and fog.

Give the Glory to Jesus. He picked me up and carried me here. Yes, I am a believer.

Much love to all. I hope that each of you get to this point where all things are settled and all you must do is live. Even though grieving, it is better without all that hanging over our heads.

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Yes Lizzy sometimes the wheels of the NHS grind so slowly xxx

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Hopefully you have fixed that shower without realising it, fingers crossed Nigel xxx

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2538

Wow that is a beauty, Mary must have been delighted with it. Thank you you again for lighting the candle it is much appreciated xxx

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2539

Unbelievable Peaches what these scammers do to entice people, makes me so angry, you were never going to fall for that xxx

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Debsie Ive seen a company advertise on tv that build annexes in gardens, no idea what they cost but they look lovely, I think thats a great idea xxx
Sorry Debsie you seem to be the only one not squeamish, I don’t want to upset others xxx

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Hi Jody nice to meet you I was on another of sue ryder sites and mistakenly one day I came onto this one and stayed because everyone is so lovely and I enjoyed talking to them, I feel we have all become friends now, my husband passed in May 2023 and I joined sue ryder community in the Sep of that year, I think Im addicted now, talk to the people on her more than I do with most of my friends xxx

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Ktg thank you for that information about that study & prayer I will think of that and of course I will pray for him, while he was all those miles away in America it was my husband I prayed to, to look after him while he was so far away. I wish you all the best for tomorrow and will be cheering you on at 09.30 tomorrow xxx

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What an achievement Peaches that is a huge weight off your shoulders well done you xxx
This is so annoying when you’re catching up on a lot of messages, and they wont allow you to keep replying until someone responds back!!! But its almost 2am most will be asleep now, I will wait a few minutes and see if it works !

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Sometimes, if I haven’t been on all day, I get a little bit shocked when there’s 111 messages to read!
What we all like?

Actually, I’ll tell you what we are all like. We’re all fighters - we are all passionate, loving, strong fighters.

I can’t tell you how proud I am of you Nigel getting to France for doing those things on your own.

Georgie, I’m sending so much love for your grandson.

Peaches, so despicable. We have a program on the BBC about it and it always shocks me how organised and disgusting they are. I’m so glad you picked up on this so quickly. Because, although it sounds really obvious he isn’t always. I myself got scanned on vinted.

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That should’ve said scammed. But my reply box is doing something funny.

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