Wedding ring

My wife died coming up to 4 weeks now .

Can I ask a personal question, when did you take the wedding ring off?

I can’t bring myself to do it

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Hi Glenn, I never have I never will, as far as I’m concerned we are still married and always will be. It nearly 16 months for me. I still mark and celebrate our wedding anniversary too.
But it’s a personal choice.
Debbie X

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Thanks Debbie , I agree it’s a personal choice, I’m expecting a varying degree of answers .

A friend said recently she did it quite early, “we aren’t married now so what’s the point? “
I thought that sounded harsh .

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I quite agreed it does sound a bit harsh, but we are all different. X

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When and if it feels right for you I am having some of my husbands ashes put into a ring to wear with my wedding ring

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A very personal decision.,
Maybe wear it on your other hand when you feel ready?

Mine has been “us” for nearly 50 years so it will stay where it is.

G. X

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Hi. I havnt wore my wedding ring for years . It didn’t fit me anymore . BUT I was still married to hubby and still am . Do what you feel is right for you . Xtake carex

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Although Chris and I lived together for 13 years I still wear my wedding ring my husband died 17years ago it’s part of me and was never an issue for Chris that I still wore it and neither should it have been

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Hi
You will get different answers to your question. Personally I won’t ever take mine off as I still feel married, it’s been there for 31 years.
Everyone is different and with everything you have to do what feels right for you
Xx

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I wore mine and my husbands wedding rings for 12 months (my husband died 14 months ago) as they gave me a lot of comfort. But when I hit the 1 year anniversary I realised that every time I looked at my hand rather than comfort me they started to upset me and remind me even more of what I had lost. So, I’ve taken mine off but still wear my husbands on my middle finger. His wedding ring was his most prized possession so I wear it in his honour and always will. However I had also reached the stage of acceptance an realised that I am no longer a married woman and have to move forward and build a new life for myself. He will always be my husband and I will never marry again but I hope to one day find someone to share my life with and so by taking mine off I feel like for me it’s a step towards my new life whatever that may be. I have my ring on my bedside table as I’m not sure if I want to put it on a chain around my neck or if I want to leave it by his picture on display. I think it’s a personal decision and whatever you decide is right. I thought I would wear mine forever and never take it off but when I realised that every time I looked at it it would make me cry I had to do what was right for my own sanity.

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Hi there
This topic has come up a few times and the general feeling is that the ring stays.
I wear my ring, my husbands and my late mothers so plenty of memories but my feeling is that I still feel married so it will stay.

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Hi, I will never take off my wedding ring, and I his ring around my neck on a gold chain since it’s too loose to wear on my finger.

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I have saved Penny’s wedding, eternity, a sapphire ring I bought her in Sri Lanka and her silver wedding ring. I don’t want them hidden away in the safe, nor do I want them stolen. I’ve eventually decided to create a display box and leave them on the mantlepiece, next to my favourite photo of her. I’d rather take the risk of them being stolen, than never see them at all.
I would wear her wedding ring on my other hand, but my little finger is much fatter than her ring finger.
As to when to remove it, I asked the bereavement office to recover her ring prior to leaving to the crematorium., but she wasnt wearing it. She had hidden it at home before she went to hospital, it took a while to find it.

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If you want to do it Glenn, I guess you will know when you’re ready. You don’t have to remove it. It’s up to you and no-one else.
It’s almost 17 months since I lost my darling husband but I’ll wear my wedding ring for the rest of my life. I will be married to Ian forever x

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I wear both my ring and John’s on a chain around my neck. I was already wearing mine on a chain well before John died almost 18 months ago because I had lost weight and hadn’t got around to getting it resized. So I simply added John’s to that. I belong to a widows and widowers group and the vast majority still wear their rings on their fingers but some, like me, do wear them on a chain. Everyone in the group does what feels right for them and people are at different stages of their journey from many years to where I am at only a year and a half.

So do whatever you feel comfortable with, Glenn. There’re no hard and fast rules with this.

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Thank you for the replies .

It was to gauge reaction , I haven’t decided what I will do , it’s too early and I’m pretty much sure it will stay .

I read wearing it on the opposite hand is a universal sign of a widowed man .

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My dear Glenn, that has to be totally your choice. Now or never it’s up to you. I will be 2 years in next Monday I wear my wedding and engagement rings almost as protection. I had Trevors ring made into a heart shaped pendant.
It’s up to you, but don’t forget, if you take it off, you can always put it back on again.
Take care X.

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I lost my darling husband 4 months ago and feel I will probably wear my wedding ring for ever as we where married 24 years and together 31 years. However my son has found a website that creates a peace of jewellery from your wedding/engagement/eternity ring. This is something I might decide to do at a later date.
Everyone is different and you will make your decision when you are ready too. Best wishes for the future

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Hi Glen, So sorry for the loss of your wife, my wife passed away suddenly 5 months ago and we had been married for 50 years last year and both our wedding rings were looking a bit worn and thin and we had spoken about having new ones made etc but we could never make up our minds on what we should do and never got round to do anything with them, so after my wife passed away I deceived to put them both together and have a new type signet ring made with some of my wife’s ashes inserted into the top of the ring, so I now wear this ring on my wedding finger and its gives me great comfort that I have both our rings together and a few of the wife’s ashes close to me as well.
Like all things on this journey of Grief that we are all experiencing you have to do what will give you the most comfort and help us learn to live with the Greif. Good luck with what you choose to do Take Care Mickere x

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Thank you all, I don’t want her rings changed into anything, just my choice , I have them in a special box with our wedding certificate.

Tomorrow is my wedding anniversary, so soon after her death

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