I’m happy to hear you still involve your husband in your life and talk to him. I do exactly the same but I believe mine is still around me anyway. Although it’s only 4 months, I’ve got past caring about my relatives, although my son and daughter have been extremely supportive; they still talk about him fondly and remind me of the funny things he used to say. I now don’t broach the subject with anyone else and I have been surprised on occasions when someone has chosen to talk about him without being prompted. People are different so you win some, you lose some. I’m happy in my own world , the one I’ve created with my lost partner. It’s really not worth caring about the people who don’t care. My thoughts are with you all 
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Quite right @Kaytoo, I will talk about my wife and when you do you can see the discomfort on their faces! a friend of mine called in yesterday and we sat and had a chat in the sun and yes my wife came into the conversation and yes it wasn’t long before he was getting up to go, sorry but I am not going to relegate her into the past because it makes you uncomfortable - your choice!
This is what makes things so difficult, personally I don’t get much chance to talk to people and include her and when I do the emotions inevitably come to the surface and this I find so hard, I grizzle when I talk about her, I grizzle when I think about her.
Six months today - life is crap.
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My youngest son says he doesn’t want negative vibes in his life because it destroys and affects his mental health, my daughter accuses my eldest son and myself of trying to swindle her, totally untrue as anything we have goes inro a Trust for me. There is only my eldest son who does anything to help me and I worry that I am a burden to him. Losing Allan after 38 years is devastating and I struggle to find any “positive vibes” about that. On the positive side I have learnt so much about human nature and truly learnt who is deserving of my time, love snd loyalty in the future. My husband would be so disappointed in his children as am I. I absolutely hate this life but am determined to keep going for the lovely caring son and the 4 friends who have been there for me.
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So sorry.
Sending you a big hug.
Rose xx
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