Thinking of you today 
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Hi everyone
Although we can’t see each other in person, we have a bond of united grief and understanding and that will help us through all of this.
I wish each and every one of you peace and comfort from treasured memories.
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@Mist2 Thank you. Sending same wishes back to you with love and hugs. Good that we have this bond here. Hope that you make through today ok. xx
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Thinking of you all today and sending hugs.
I knew today would be difficult but had no idea of the absolute awfulness of it, pain and heartache is literally unbearable.
I opened a present of a close friend of mine and it was a bucket list book, at first I didn’t know whether to cry or feel hurt but I looked at it, it’s a planning your life journal and I stared at all the blank pages and thought how on earth do I fill that? but I made a start because one thing for sure is I am never going to spend another Xmas like this ever again and it inspired me, I cannot change what has happened because it is in the past and I can’t dwell there either, those blank pages are my life ahead and I can do anything I want to do, I find this somewhat comforting. None of us know how much time we have left and I have to make it count. It feels strangely weird but 2024 is a new chapter and only I can find my happiness again. My loved one’s will be with me on the journey but this is MY book, I am the author. I hope we all find our new beginnings
Love Lyn x
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Hi Lyn,
Thanks for your post. What you say has kind of been rolling around my mind as well.
Come January it will be two years since my gorgeous wife Christine died. This second year has been absolutely awful, horrendous. A living nightmare. But somehow, here I am. I know I cannot sustain this level of awfulness. I know that only I can grope towards a tolerable and hopefully happier future. Some support, encouragement and frankly some luck would be great. But the buck does stop with me. In a sense, you kind of have to want to effect some change.
But how to start is what I am wrestling with, in addition to my grief.
My best wishes to you, and encouragement towards new beginnings and of course to everyone else in this most excellent community. I hope you all can find some peace and comfort at this extra challenging time.
Simon x
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Sending hugs to you too @Sarlyn. Like you, I knew today would be difficult but never expected it to be so unbelievably heart wrenching, As the day wears on, I feel I am existing on another planet.
I have also promised myself that I am not going to endure another Christmas like this one. I know my dear husband would not wish it for me.
You have a very thoughtful friend.
I hope we can eventually find some peace.
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Hi Simon
I don’t know where to start either to be honest but this simple book has made me think…I don’t want empty pages so that is somewhat of a start and I definitely will not spend another Xmas like this one. Yes the biggest message is the buck does stop with us. Although we have always been part of “2 of us” we are all individual too so it is about learning what makes us tick? What brings us happiness and joy? I have no hobbies or interests so I am going to find one. This is a time of inner reflection within ourselves because we are still here for a reason. I could have a possible 20yrs left so I can’t go on like this and this present from my kind friend is a nudge forwards. Does it fill me with terror? Yes, but so does the alternative of constantly being in pain
Lyn x
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I have a suggestion for one of my pages (lol) maybe for those that want to we think about arranging a weekend trip away? A little adventure for us grievers
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Hi Sarlyn
I think a good idea to think of things we want to do with the time we have left as we dont know how long we have left.
We are used to being a couple and now as one we need to find out what things we want to do in life.
I think a weekend trip would be good an adventure and people who want to meet up from all areas sounds good.
Sending hugs
Lynne Xx
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As we all now know anything in this life is possible, so while we are in control why not make it pleasurable…x
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A weekend trip away? Yes indeed!
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I will look into in the new year
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Hi @Sarlyn
Thanks let me know sometime next year.
I am in Scotland but there are people all over the UK Ireland and further afield
Enjoy whats left of Christmas Day and it will be over soon Xx
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@Galaxy75 seven months for me I had to go away to the sun . My thoughts are with you love xxxxx
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Hi @Jol
Thought of that but didnt want to travel alone.
Maybe next year.
Hope you are enjoying the 
Lynne X x
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@Galaxy75 we have had a different day in the sun . Thank you
My husband passed away in March - we have no kids - thought I was doing ok until December - I never liked Christmas but he always made it fun. Can’t wait to see the back of this year. I chose to spend it alone as I was afraid of spoiling it for everyone else, No family close by. Normally a very positive person but this has knocked me for six and trying very hard to find a new normal and future for myself - so, so difficult.
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I also chose to spend the day alone but omg it’s been the longest day ever. I’ve cried all morning bought some lovely food but couldn’t be bothered to cook it. Definitely need to do something different next year. The best thing to come out of today was 3 separate visits from a robin. Not long until this day is over thank god.
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Hi @mcgamhan @Helen24
Like both of you my husband passed away 7 months ago and i decided to spend Christmas alone. Last year we both spent it with our family in Australia. This year so different spent it alone no family here.
Thought it would be easy just another day like all others i have done in 7 months but i was so wrong it hurt 
i cryed most of the day. I will be glad when the day is over and dont have to face again till next year.
Just hogmanay and New Year which again is just another 2 day’s on the calendar.
Hope 2024 is better 
Lynne Xx
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