Work

Morning mom
I’m going to work now see you later and I tell you all about my day xxx

Hello mom
my day was hard it was a first aid training day. Looking at the rescue anne I could feel the wave coming up my legs. They unziped the bag I just ran out of the room and hide in the toilet I just could not bring my self to do cpr on a manikin. Then later on the boss asked me how I was and I said not good he then taped me on the arm and walked off.

Morning mom
I was greated this morning by my partner telling me to cheer up and smile. I would have liked a kiss and a hug…I had hoped my boss would have texted or phoned last night as I did tell him yesterday I was not good but no. Mom going to work now I tell you about my day when I get home xxx

Hi mom
Today we had a lesson obbsevation not me but the teacher.The head teacher sat the whole time watching me then at the end of the obb he came and sat at the table and asked how I was. Ok feeling a little taken back as we are in the classroom full of children. I reply with not to good as I’m not sleeping very well I feel sick my legs feel like lead weights and My brain feels like I’m in fog and I just want to cry. I had a panic attake doing my first aid yesterday. He then replys with whats it like as I dont now Ihaven’t lost my parents. It like having all your worst fear multipled and then getting on a rollercoster. Then I have to comfort a young girl of 5 because she is crying because she misses her mom. He then gets up and leaves the classroom. Its been a hard day xxx

Morning mom
I long for the day I dont get up feeling sick. But I can hear you saying go to school your feel better. I’m worried about David as he had a meeting with the council about the house yesterday and I cant get hold of him I will try again tonight. Going to work now speak to you later love you mom xxx

Hi mom
I am so tierd .work well another lesson obb but with another teacher I just want to catch my breath . I feel so sick. I miss you so much. Why is it so hard. Not looking forward to tomorrow as the teacher I work with on a Thursday and a Friday hasnt got a clue. Alway making up excuses to get out of her work how can I carry her when I cant evencarry myself so sorry mom I dont want to moan but How can I be strong when you ant here by my side with your calming words xxx talkto youin the morning

Morning mom
My head is pounding today. There’s an ache in my heart, no amount of time could undo. As I have to learn to let go of the pieces off myself that I lost when I lost you. So much of who I was, was because of you. And now I must navigate that loss to. My boss texted last nigh asking how I am I just feel like he isnt listening . Its unbareable working with such little children who cry and say I miss my mom I feel like I have to push my feelings to oneside and comfort them it break my heart that I know one day they will miss there mom like I do mine. Well spoke to my baby sis about my bro and the house they have passed it to a different depart.ent for transfer of tenance so it is a wait and see speak to you after work love you mom xxx

Hello mom
Today we had show around to new parents so a lot of childfen cring and telling me they miss mom it took a lot I had to sit in
my car for lunch today just to get some air and now he is texti g to see how I am. Tomorrow we are doing rememberence day another day Ive got to hold it together I could realy do with some of your wisdom and strength xxx

Morning mom
Walking the dog is getting harder had to stop on the hill today to catch my breath also feel so quick to snap at tbe dog just for going one side of me to tbe other I dif trip over him but realy why a.I so snappy speack to you after work love you xxx

Mom it all came to a head today
My boss came to help me today putting some equipment away. He said I upset him yesterday when I didnt stop to talk to him. He asked me how I was and I just stud and cried I tried to walk away and he just kept following me and asking how I was and did I need help and that I should talk. I cried some more and he hugged me. I just wanted it to last for ever but I think I was making his shirt wet. So I told him his text had hurt me asking me if I was coming back to work 6 days after my mom had past he replied with I am running a school. He did say he would make me a cup of tea next week and a chat .let see… I did tell him it is hard as some children come to school on Mondays crying saying they miss their mom and I have to comfort them I really miss your hugs. I spoke to David today he did say he is doing ok and he spome to the council and they are passing it to a different department andhesbeen to the jobcenter. Hedid say Dad came over Thursday and he looked a little bit better. Going over tomorrow to sort the charrity things out love you mom xxx

Morning mom
Just finished working the dog I miss our friday chats xxx talk to you later xxx

Hello mom
I was going home to take somethings to the charity today as I steped into my car and turn the key nothing flate battery AAHHRRR. So pete took me all he did was huff and puff and say his got better things to do today I could really do with a hug Im tring to hold it all together remembering you is easy living with out you is the hard bit xxx

Mom I wish you were here
I put a photo on facbook of me having tea in the caravan so pete commented saying thats it we are not using the caravan I
Was so hurt we canceled our holidy because I was hurtting and I was not up to having a holiday mom I miss you so much I could do with a hug right now xxx talk to you tomorrow night god bless xxx

Hello mom I changemy picture of one of you on your wedding day xxx I cleaned the cooker today and pete was out so I had the house to my self .I went for a long walk to the shops but I didnt get anyrhing I started to tile the kitchen it was an ok day love you mom xxx

Good morning mom
Just going to walk the dog and then of to work. Its feels ok today the pain is there I ate some chiken last night I miss hugging you and you talking to me but part of me feels like you are here with me holding me together xxx

Love you mom
Ive had the shakes today but Im ok just going to walk the dog speak to hou tomorrow so tierd need to sleep xxx

Morning mom its raining again
Finding it hard last night as we had our books looked at mine came back with a ? Why did I say super work on a childs book who could not do his work as it was to hard but he did manage to build a tower of 5 bricks. I did stamp his book with surport but my coment said super work. We have another show around today withnew parents for reception class. One of our parents was crying yesterday found that hard as she has this all tocome as her mom has been told 3 to 6 months and see is having a rough time with her breast cancer . Love you mom miss you so much xxx

Hi mom today was quite just kdpt my head down I could realy do with a hug right now thoughove you a d .iss you xxx

Morning mom
So tierd Just remember to breath put on a smile and put one step infront of the other I can do this love you mom xxx

Hi mom
today was ok. But I could really do with a hug Its be a long day I return home just wanting a hug but I walk in to an argument xxx I just want to curl up and cry and be hugged.

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