Oh Peter I feel your pain I lost my darling husband of 59 years 8 weeks ago and don’t really know how to cope, he was my rock I I have a very supportive family but I know I must make this journey on.
Hi Sheila
I agree that you cannot wipe out over 50 years together. Paul died nearly 21 months ago and sometimes it feels like yesterday. On really bad days I write in a journal just how I feel. I last wrote in it 2/6 and said if people die of a broken heart why am I still here? I still get days like that but not so many. Hugs to all. We will survive.
Dear Carol9
Two years next month and for me it feels like yesterday when my world came crashing down and my heart was broken. Nothing has changed since that day except we now have another grandson - destined never to meet his granda. His brother knew his granda’s love if only for a brief time and God did my husband love him. Tears, tears, tears.
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Nearly twenty months for me. I quite often feel that I am just waiting to die. Nice to see Children and grandchildren but not the same. Some days seem very long when I don’t speak to anyone.
Dear Carole2
That’s exactly how I feel. I keep going for our kids and grandson’s but ultimately this is now just an existence for me. I try to see the grandson’s on a daily basis, try hard to appear happy but inside heartbreak that my husband is not here. He always wanted to be a granda and had 9 months of having that experience and loved every minute. When I get back from our son’s there is nothing but long lonely nights. I have taken to going to bed sometimes at 7.30 because I know no one will be in touch.
In the first few months after my husband died I wrote to him through email every night and sent him texts. I last texted him on 15 August telling him that I can’t stand this life without him. I still cry every day.
Take care. xxxxx
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My baby was only 47 as well… it’s just the most horrific pain… it’s only been a few weeks but it feels like years since he held me… my heart breaks for as all…
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Hi sheila26
It’s 21 months since I lost my darling and I’m still learning to live without him and it’s not easy. I have joined our local U3A and attend several groups but I’m often crying inside. Many of the people there are on their own. I have one friend who has been widowed 24 years. She says bereavement seems to last forever and she had never got used to being on her own but she has learned to accept it. My heart goes out to you and all of the rest of the sad lonely widows and widowers. It’s impossible to imagine what it is like until you experience it.
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I talk to my hubby all the time and in my head I can hear him telling me I’m doing ok and in time I will be able to do the things that we used to do together. If I’m feeling low I can hear him telling me he loves me. Every night he used. to say good night my precious I love you and I would say you too, I still say it to him for both of us. He will always be with me in my heart nothing can take that away from me and your wife will always be with you in your heart. Life is cruel but be strong for yourself and your wife she would be so proud of you. All that you are experiencing is part of grief. Take care. Sue
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i havent worn make up
either whats the point. im laying here crying now
cant believe eight weeks ago he alive im angry and dont like it
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It’s so amazing to read how so many feel exactly the way I feel and are reacting the same way as I am doing. I too hold my husband Jacks clothes to my face and smell them and imagine his Beautiful strong arms around me. My feelings of desperate loss is over whelming and I feel every day that I can’t bear one more moment without him. I am finding comfort in this forum to read that I’m experiencing similar feelings as many others. I just want my Darling Jack back. I can’t bear life without him.
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Hiya dawn it’s hard life without them it’s 2years 11th November for me after 44years of marriage he was my life lv annie x x x
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Oh my Dear Annie. How awful for you! 44 years! How are you coping now? I do have an amazing support system, but coming home to the home I shared with my Beloved Jack and not seeing him here is heartbreaking, and I truly feel like my heart is literally breaking. The Bible says that when a couple get married, the” two will become one flesh” , Genesis 2:24 so that must be why I feel like half of me has gone. Thank you for sharing your response with me. Love, Dawn xx
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I was totally unprepared for how much harder it is having lost my darling husband suddenly compared to any other loss I have felt. It is as others have said, part of me is missing. We were so close in so many ways and although we did some things separately, the best times were when we did things together, no matter how simple they were. Even working in the garden, or helping him with cutting a fallen tree on the farmland. Simply being together made life good so to lose that is unbearable.
Thanks for this community of others who are going through the same pain, as those who still have their ‘other half’ can’t understand what it’s like.
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KarenF
I lost my husband last night through cancer. It seemed to happen so quickly even though he had been diagnosed for a few months. I can’t get the picture of him taking his last breath out of my head. We are both Christians and so at least I know he is in a better place but it hurts like Hell doesn’t it?
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It certainly does. I didn’t see my husband between him going out to play football and viewing his body at the undertakers. I sometimes wish I had been with him but, as you have experienced, that brings its own grief.
I am sure that in time the good images of him will begin to be more prominent than your last image. Sending hugs.
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I don’t think it’s any easier either way. My husband’s death was expected but it sounds like yours was out of the blue so you are dealing with the shock as well. I hope you have good support around you. My worry is what happens when they all go back to their own lives. Sending big hugs back to you.
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No, I agree about there not being an easy way. Whatever we go through it’s awful. 
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everything hurts. you count the days they have been gone:cry:i loved being married i miss my Brian everyday. no one knows cos im always smiling they dont see me at 2 am sobbing . im so sad fed up i need a cuddle:cry:
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I’m so sorry for your loss. I know exactly how you feel about people not seeing the real you. I’m feeling so sad too. Every morning you wake up with a new realisation that you are on your own. Sending you huge hugs and a shoulder to cry on. X
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It also comes in waves for me. I had a few better days then, whoosh, back to sobbing and an awful nights sleep after a chance remark about someone else’s husband recovering from his heart attack.
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