Best ways to cope with loss of mother

Losing a parent
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Hi Zoe
Thankyou for your kind comments, I hope I can bring comfort to some on this site like yourself, I do my best as in all things I do.

re: your demand for payment, if you haven’t got the money you haven’t got the money, and if you are over 60 they cannot throw you out of your house to get possession of it, and if it depends on the sale of your dads house then they will just have to wait, the claim is on your dads estate, not on you, the bum side of that is it will reduce your inheritance.

Probably true about what you said about jesus re the life of brian and he did like parties and I am trying to get his autobiography, a very very intresting man who had the ability to heal any human ailment, he fixed dementia in one man, had a word with him and he put his clothes back on and behaved himself, reminds me of a sergeant major on national service I have heard off, he had a word with people and they toed the line after that.(YOU HORRABLE LITTLE MAN!!!) sorry, couldn’t resist that.

Meditation is a good idea and I am developing an interest in it, I have so many of them at the moment as I begin to reinvent myself and find my way again, that process can take a few years, grief takes its own course, part of us is ripped out with there passing, its not like missing heart beat after the final episode, such trivia is superfishal, NOT part of our lives, it feels as if part of you is missing, which of course it is, you are never the same afterwards.

It is so sad about the Tilbury speech, for a while it was thought that it took place later, accept for the fact queen liz was by that time no longer up to it and was a decaying, semi demented spinster, they might have hired a look alike actress to do it if they really wanted to but apparently did not, and it would take a very brave actress indeed to do it, but they tend not to lack courage, it takes guts to put yourself forward like they do and it could have been done that way and it is just possible the secret might have endured, I wish she had made that speech for real, it would be right up there with ‘I have a dream’ at Ginsburg, ‘we shall fight them on the beaches’ Churchill after Dunkirk, and Kennedys famous speech ‘we choose to go to the moon, not because it is easy, but because it is hard’.

As you will have gathered I have a love of history, and I find it inspirational, Churchill and Douding are among my heroes who bought Britain through her hours of greatest peril since the Vikings and the dark ages, and without them, at the very least we would be communicating in German, Yayu hair Furer!!, that evil had to be stopped no matter what the cost, we, the british, were not always brilliant the way we went about things and did some terrible things in India, and even Churchill sacked a high ranking officer over a masa cure, but, we were far better then the Nazis and the appaling, murderess rogeam created by Hitler and held together with ruthless efficiency, hatred and fear.

My mother, was part of that jeneration, on the 22nd May 1941 she lost her cousin who was serving middle east with the RAF, A.C.1 Cesal Redhead off No10 squadron,
he was an aircraft instrument technician and was 19, I have the plaque dedicated to his memory and presently its castodium,I had it rescued from the church were it was at the request of my mother before it was pulled down for development into flats.

I am interested to know that Churchill was interested in the spirit world, like Dowding, those two men were pivotal to the defence of Britain during the early war years, almost certainly kept this interest from each other and did not trust each other, Churchill had Dowding pact off to canada after the B of B to keep him out of the lime light, I think Dowding was actually more intelligent then Churchill;, he did master mind the chain home defence, what became known as ‘The roof over England’ it is amazing how many grate people are interested in the spirit world, I am in good company.

You should write for Doyle and Hardy, these gentlemen are placing grate trust in you and doing you a grate honour, might even make you wealthy, it would give you a mission in life, to help you to reinvent, and find yourself again, and move on from the darkness into the light, start today if you feel up to it.

You may know of an account to contact Doyle after he passed on using channelling, they inadvertently contacted the captain of the lost airship R101, designed by Barnes Wallis,(not blaming him) apparently he and his crew were not happy at the intrusion and requested to be left alone, they do not always want to cooperate, it is as well to work with them when they do.

Have a good day, I find you a grate support too.

Blessings and piece be with you

Timxx

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Anyone on the air tonight? been another thrustrating day

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I’m here. Had the funeral today and have been crying a lot. It was a lovely cermony, but it was painful.

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Hello Ulma, I’m not going to insult you by asking you how you feel because I know how you feel, give yourself time, do not do anything you do not want to do, or do not have to do, and do not let others push you into something you are uncomfortable with, if you wish for company, or to be alone, or for the company of close friends,that, at this time is your rite.

There is no simple answer to grief and bereavement, and we are all different, and there is no correct way to grieve so do not listen to anyone who says that there is.

May I suggest you take paracetamol, it will not stop the grief, but it will ease the pain of the grief, you can take 2 tablets (1000mg) at a time, NOT MORE OFTEN then 4 hours apart, after 5 days you must consult a doctor if still tacking them in accordance with prescribed clinical practice.

Another thing you can and should do is get as much sleep as you can, bereavement puts a huge strain on both the mind and body and the best thing is sleep, also try to eat enough and stay hydrated, good idea to drink hot chocolate made from milk, milk hydrates you better then water and is also food, avoid alcohol, it is actually a depressant and will make you feel worse.

Appart for that stay warm, I do not know if you are alone at the moment, but if that is your choice then that is best for you, I hope you have a choice and everyone has not just rushed off and left you if you want company, I am still getting over my mother, and toying with using antidepressants, to be reviewed in January, spoke to my mental health nurse yesterday.

Even those who fought in the Battle of Britain got there sleep at night, and most of them had a spitfire to fight back with, for 6 months I hardly slept day and night looking after my mother, I am still a wreck and probably shortened my life, I will never be what I was again.

I still feel that part of me is missing, and it is, you nevber get over a real bereavement, you get used to it and grow around it, that loss leaves an unfillable hole in one, we are all going through it together.

Try to get some rest Ulma, I hope you have friends close by tonight if you need them.

My God give you the strength, courage and fortitude to carry on, the humility to accept the things you cannot change and the piece,time and space, to recover, rebuild your life and move on.

I know tonight your heart is broken, I hope it will mend, message me and I will reply if you wish me to.

Bless you Ulma.

Timxx

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You ok tonight Laura, seems rather quiet tonight, only contact tonight has been Ulma, were is everyone?.

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Thanks, Tim, as always, for the advice. I’m alone right now, not quite by choice, but I felt I couldn’t impose on my friends any longer today. I hope I can get some rest, it was a early morning and I barely slept last night.

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I am hear if you want to talk about today Ulma as long as you wish

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Sorry Tim I stayed at Mums house . How are you doing ?

@Ulma how are you feeling today ? Such difficult times I’m sending love to you xx

@Jess1 how are you doing ?

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Hello Laura, I am sure that was good for your mum, how are you today?, hope you are well, things are looking up a bit and the rain is easing and my depression with it, trying to keep off the antidepressants as they have there own issues.

Intend to go to church tomorrow and take a repaired clock with me to a congregation member, just trying to be positive and do the rite thing, (hopefully playing all the rite notes in the rite order for those of us chronologically gifted enough to remember that one!)

Any more strange happenings around the house of interest to clarevoyants and mediums(sounds like blithe spirit)

Hope you, the cat and everyone else well.

Enjoy your weekend.

Timxx

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Sorry, I went to bed and got a little sleep. Thank you for offering to talk.

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Hi Laura. Thank you! Today is bad, or rather worse than the usual bad. The emptiness is crushing.

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Ulma you poor thing!!, I lived with my mum, you lived with your dad, and know we are both live alone along with so many people in the town ware I live in the Northwest(cannot say ware exactly, classified) but some 30% of house holds have just a single occupant, so sadly live aloners are not uncommon, and there is nothing ODD about us just because we live alone, it is not our fault that everyone else either lives away, or has died, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

The Italians manage things much better ware they tend to live like the Waltons, generations together in houses big enough so everyone has there own space ware they have there own facilities but tend to come together to eat and for social events and we would do well to learn from them instead of us all wanting individual houses and living sometimes hundreds of miles apart, it is mad when you think off it.

I hope some good friends invite you out, you sound a nice lady, if I were near you I would invite you out for lunch, its the least they can do and a little kindness goes a long way.

Keep your chin up hen, get out of the house if the weather permits and have a coffee or something, I know you are greaving and going through hell, consider getting a pet for company, one that bonds to you, you need something like that know.

Timxx

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Thanks, Tim! You’re right, we should learn from that. We are so focused on individualism and breaking free from our parents and earlier generations that we’ve forgot to take care of each other.

I do have an animal friend and that is the only thing that holds me up somewhat now.

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I’ve been there @Ulma and there is nothing I can say to make it better . It’s absolutely horrible .
Just know you aren’t alone and we understand .
Xx

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Morcormbe and wise reference Tim ? I asked my Mum !
She is doing ok considering but misses my Dad so much . They would have been married 52 years on Monday.
We all miss him desperately.
I haven’t had anymore weird goings on since the Tv turned on apart from the lights flickered when we mentioned getting the meter changed . It’s always at Mums house it happens not mine .
I am glad that your mood has lifted a little that is good news .
Meg is good - she doesn’t go out much as it’s too cold and wants to stay by the fire as much as she can . Be back on later
. Xx

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Thanks, Laura. There are so few who understand the immense loss when it’s a parent. People in general is more that’s life and think you should move past it quickly.

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I think they do and just chat to you like normal . It’s an awful isolating feeling x

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It really is. Thank goodness for this site.

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Hi Ulma, what sort of animal friend?.

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Correct Laura, it was both there funniest, and finest hour, and is the one that will be remembered as much as ‘4 candles’ with the 2 Ronnies, and I am old enough, and privileged enough, to have seen them at the time they were new and first publicly aired.

The 70’s was the golden age for comedy, and they knew what was funny and what worked and they performed a valuable public service by lifting the Nations spirits and probably did more good for the nations health then anything else, laughter is the best medicine.

My parents just made the 50th wedding anniversary, and it is ofcourse a time when we remember them, the photograph of my mother was taken at her silver wedding in 1982 (married in 57) and these are very dear memories, as I am sure they are for you.

Meg is a wise cat, staying in the warm and purring with content no dough.looks a happy and well looked after puss.

Bless you, contact later.

Timxx