Thats very kind of you Laura, thankyou for your advice, she it will be, should I spade her?.
Yes . 100% .definitely x
Hi Laura, how has your weekend been?.
Looking after Ruby this week(sis-in-laws dog, a staffy terrier, lick you to death) saves her coming home from school during the week while next door naubeur in hospital for a new knee joint.
Proberbly too windy for the allotment today, blowing a gail in grange know, but at least it is a bit warmer.
getting on with my snug and put up more thermal insulating wall paper this morning, no I did not go to church (3 hale Mary’s!!) but did go to sis in law to discuss things over lunch and she asked me to look after Ruby for a bit, will send you a photo next week.
Hope all well, stay warm and safe if you possibly can, do not go out if the weather is wild unless you really have to.
Blessings to all including your fur baby.
Timxx
Hi my mum died suddenly 15th January 2024
I just cant get my head around never being able to speak to her 
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So sorry for your loss no words can describe the pain your in right now everyone on here we have all lost someone we love hearing from them it gets you through your day helps with the pain
Hello , my Dad died suddenly in July so I know how this hurts . It’s absolutely horrible . The pain is very raw isn’t it . We all understand - you can talk to us xx
Yes too windy for the allotment, we went a walk and for some food . I’ve been feeling down today so will be glad to go to bed and start again . Ah Ruby will be good company for you ! Sounds a good idea to look after her x x
Hi Tinks, so sorry for your very recent loss.
Lost my mum 5th January last year after a 4 year dementia battle.
She thought like Ukraine to the very last second, passing in my arms at home at 20:10 hours, we were alone together at that moment, I am 63, but at that moment the world looked, and felt, a very cold and frightening place.
If dementia were Badyboy Putin, my mum would have been President Kilesky of Ukraine.
I know the first days and weeks are horrible, I just wanted to pass away in my sleeping bag, and I would have done had I not been found 
The fact of the mater was, I did not want to live, and let me tell you something, I still have those feelings more then a year on.
You will find you are stronger then you think, but ALL GRIEF IS DIFFERENT, and your grief journey will be unique to you, and that, is why there is no such thing as a correct way to grieve, no, this is not medical advice, but the days, weeks, and months ahead will test you like you have probably never been tested before, it is a time for courage, faith, forbearance, and perseverance.
Grief, is the price we pay for love, it is the effect, of the mind and body, adjusting to a new, and unwanted reality, and of it training its self to accept this.
You may find that friends find it hard to talk to you, because they do not know what to say, and feel arcrud about talking to you for fear of upsetting you, those of us who
are on this journey, and I still am, while we do not know just how you are feeling, have a much better idea about what to say.
I am sorry you are on this site, but you have found a good place, we all support each other as well as we can.
I have done a lot of investigation into the afterlife, we are not just flesh and blood, we are considerably more then that, the body is just a vehicle that gives us a means of interacting in the earth plane, it is the soul and spirit that gives life to the flesh(my mum new all about this, she was into Cristian science), I am into mediums and clairvoyants starting with a paranormal experience the night after the death of my twin brother, I will tell you that another day, enough to take in for know.
Your mother is still with you, she walks with you in spirit every day, you cannot see her, but she can see you, give it 3 months at least, then find a medium, a good one with a decent reputation, I think you will be amazed.
OK, proberbly told you enough for know, take each day as it comes, try to set yourself a single task for each day, I am still doing it more then a year on.
Let me recommend a book to you, ‘You are not alone’ by Julian Lloyd, it is her own story about her own grief journey, for that is what it is.
May God give you the strengh and guidance in the days ahead to carry on.
Blessings to you, and all who love you.
Timxx
Greaving is a learning curve, you will learn a lot about yourself, most of us on this site have suffered trarma in the past of one type or other before a bereavement brought us to this site and so many of us are on antidepressants, I am still under a mental health nurse and slowly regaining my health, I was offered the help before my mum passed after caring for her for four years, that kind act by my mums doctor saved my sanity and probably my life, I was a wreck and had been suffering anticipatory grief, that is grief of a forth coming event, I understand my own grief, and am free to talk about it, your grief WILL be different to mine.
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Hope you are better soon Laura.
Blessings to all.
Timxx
So sorry for your loss 
I lost my mum in September last year. It is the hardest and most surreal time. Just take things day by day and listen to your body, sometimes you will just need to rest. It’s such a shock to the system. I don’t know what your thoughts are on life after death, some of us have had some sort of experience, if you think that will give you any comfort, we can share them with you.
Everyone is different in how they cope with their loss but just remember, you will cope. One way or another you will find your way to cope and keep going.
Amy xxx
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Good evening Laura, I hope you are better, what is your agenda tonight?xx
Hi Tinks and how are you tonight?
Tim
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How are you Charyll?, hope you are warm, did you go for your walk?.
Timxx
Hello Tim , I’ve just been making food and watching tv tonight .
Still tired so I’m trying for an early night and to read . How about you ? How is Ruby ?
Wind is going to get up again tomorrow …
xx
Hello Laura, sorry you are still tired, thats what grief does to you, it saps your energy and I have a long way to go as we all do.
I have binned of the Amlodipine(for hypertension) and my knee has improved, it has been causing joint bleeding.
Ruby is sleeping, intend to get an early night myself.
Hope your allotment survives the Gail, in particular your shed.
Timxx
Hi Amy, hope you survived the storm.
For the moment looking after sis-in-laws dog, a Staffordshire terrier called Ruby
Horrible wet day in the lakes and the wind is getting up again, Ruby does not like the rain and does NOT want walking in the wet, quick trip out to the garden and back again!!.
Have you considered a cat?, if I get my own dog it will probably be a long hared cirourou like Jess has, both breeds can live for 20 years so by then I will probably have bionic hips and knee joints, probably a motorised Zimmer frame as well!.
I have binned of the amlodipine I take for hypertension, been causing joint bleeds in my knee.
Are mums are still with us, thanks for ‘liking’ my post the other day, done same for you.
Blessings to all, lets hope for better weather soon.
Timxx
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Hi thank you for your reply
I have a daughter with autism which pretty much takes up most of my time.
Im having to be strong for her its her 13th birthday on Sunday and shes so upset i wont remember it…
So ive arranged a day to Blackpool for her Friday.
But its so bitter sweet as i feel guilty it being so close to my mum dying and her not even having a funeral yet. We still dont know postmortem results and are unable to get a death certificate to arrange the funeral. I feel like im in limbo and the feelings and emotions are coming in waves.
I definitely believe in life after death snd have seen mediums in the past before my mum passed. I definitely intend on doing this
What are the reasons behind waiting to see one after a loved one passes i wonder 
Hello Tim yeah I went for the walk jack loved it we just wrapped up warm
Been asleep most of today didn’t sleep well the night before
Take a deep breath your doing the best you can me mams post Morton took 4 months she had early stages of pneumonia and her cause of death was decomsated liver disease she drank her self to death because she mist my step dad amazing man there together again so lost with out her I can’t even see my sister she looks like me mam I’m devastated only been 5 months the tears never stop
I suffer from triggers not because of me mam dying because I’m also a victim of being stalked were he fitted 7 listening devices in my plug sockets i survived
Hi Tinks, so sorry about your daughter but please do not feel guilty, you cannot have done anything to make things different and are as much the victim of events as anyone else.
Look, its January, people may want to come to your mums funeral from a long way, they may be getting on and dragging them a long way at short notice is hard on everyone.
Do what I did, go for direct cremation, and have the funeral later with the ashes when the weather is warmer and people can travel more easily, it really allowed me to gather my self and ‘come up for air’ because at the time I was in no state to cope, either physically or mentally and it was so much better to have it later.
My mum let me keep the ashes, I made the casket the centre of a wall memorial to my family, she passed on January the 5th, funeral was 17th April with the ashes and that allowed others to attend who live a long way off, and it was niece to see my mothers cousin and his girl friend, also my god sisters who would not have been able to come otherwise, ashes are ashes, there is no hurry, and in my mums case is was the right thing to do, I did a eulogy to her and it was very well received, followed by lunch near by for close family members and family friends.
The reason for waiting before you go to a medium is it takes about 3 months for them to come through properly, I was to eager, so I am going back on the 4th Feb to my clairvoyant in Southport.
Sorry to say Blackpool does not look good in this weather, book the sandcastle for her or something, an in door thing with a sauna and jucuzi would not be a bad idea.
Hear is the memorial to my family
On the left is my late father, the right with horns grolwing out of his head is my passed twin brother, the middle of course is my mum at her silver wedding.
Think of what I have suggested if going the cremation root, give yourself and everyone else time.
Blessings to you and your daughter, hope she enjoys her birthday, as much as she can.
Tim