Yeah I know what you mean. It does help to some extent talking on here.
He might not even be seeing someone it could just be his mates messing around on the comments but it did make me wonder.
How are you now Jess?
Sorry I’ve been quiet , I have been sorting my old car and transferring to a new one , all the paperwork etc,
Also i went on a hen do , it was supposed to be a weekend but i only managed the afternoon before I had enough and came home , I’m glad i did as there was a huge bust up when i left , not sure why but i couldn’t have handled that.
hope you are all ok as can be .
Tim how is Ruby? Will you be keeping her ?
xx
Hi Jess
Sorry to hear that 
that would upset me too. Some people get on with things differently but if he is pursuing someone new hopefully he’d let yous know. Maybe it is not serious and he is not interested but his friends are trying to push him into it? Just because you said the friends in the comments are what have got you to this idea. Hope you’re doing okay x
1 Like
Hi Laura. Hen nights are notorious for trouble and I am surprised you went, and when girls scrap they are worse then the boys, and frankly more dangeras, they gang up like a pack and can be terribly destructive and I am glad you mist the ‘fun??’
Happy with the new car?, went to Southport today and took my mums dressing table to my niece, I love my Nissan Micra, grate little car, my nievce turned up in her large car that she past her test in and remarked how tiny it is, I mentioned I could lift it before I wrecked my knee(probably how I did it!!!, we were not meant to lift cars accept in dire emergency)she is know a successful business woman with her own painting and decorating business, she is really good at it and made £31000 last year, I suppose if you have children that is an incentive to really do something.
My clairvoyant says there is going to be a birth in my family, clearly my Niece is going to have a third child.
I have Ruby again this week, have just bought her home from sis-in-law, if sis-in-law were not there I would be keeping Ruby. Ruby is fine. Tends to hog my sleeping bag, we bunk up together in the night.
Weather warmer hear, turning colder on Thursday with ice and snow.
Blessings to all.
Tim xx
Try not to let it worry you Jess, face book has a reputation for appealing to frankly not the best people and some do use it as a platform to stir things up and cause trouble, and as Laura said, face book is more trouble then its worth, personally I have stopped using it, I do not want to be provoked into sinking to the level of some of its users, who from what I have seen, and judging by there comments, do not have to much of the ‘grey matter’ between the ears, most of it is intellectually bankrupt and morally decrepit, and to a large extent we become the company we keep, I suggest you dump face book.
Hope you enjoy your week off, get out for more long walks with dobby if the weather is fit, probably the best thing for your health.
Keep yopur pecker up.
Tim xx
I know what you mean - a big group of feisty girls can lead to disaster with alcohol . So glad I went home . A gut instinct said “go home “
New car is a Vauxhall estate . I’ve been out in it and I’m fine with it now . Only thing I’m struggling with is it doesn’t have a handbrake . Just a button !I’ll get used to it eventually.
My dad always says the more complicated it is the more can go wrong and I agree !
Take care all of you xx
Laura, your ‘gut instinct’ was probably your dad telling you to ‘get the hell out of it’ and if so, he was right.
Always trust your intuition, it will never let you down.
I have not come upon this button operated hand brake before, they should call it a ‘button brake’ instead, if they want to do that why not make the whole thing automatic?, its just so confusing, in heavy vehicles its a lever that works a vacuum brake (the system is held off in normal running via a vacuum pump and locks on in idle mode) your dad was not wrong, was he an engineer?.
Blessings to all
Timxx
Hi Tim , my Dad was a plumber and had been in the building trade as well but just very practical and logical. All of us turned to him for advice . I miss that a lot . How are you and Ruby ?xx
Hi Laura, and how are you today?
I think your dad was a jack of all trades and a master of most and would have got on well with my brother who was also a plumber.
Me and Ruby are fine, she is making herself comfortable in my sleeping bag at the moment, I have just had a chicken casserole and spending the evening ordering more insulation for my snug and a candle making kit.
Weather forecast is colder later in the week with a return to winter conditions, so get your car de-icer out unless you keep the car in a garage(my other Nissan is in mine) I intend to learn to MiG weld and put it back together, so will be a good project for me one day.
Has son plade anymore football, out in all weathers no doubt.
Hope your mum is ok, blessings to all including Meg.
Tim xx
Hi everyone
How are yous today? Anyone just finding they are super exhausted all the time? I was in the office today and I am completely wiped out. Feels like I can’t get enough sleep.
We took my mums sister out at the weekend it was nice to spend some time with her and get her out and about too.
Hope everyone is doing okay
1 Like
Yeah me! I am completely fine getting to sleep and staying asleep but I never feel refreshed and I literally feel like I’ve the weight of the world on my shoulders! Had such a sore neck for weeks on end but that’s where I hold all my stress!
I feel older than what I am these days with the way I’ve been feeling and I can’t seem to shake it off 
The physical side of grief definitely took me by surprise and I’m really hoping I’m not like this forever!
2 Likes
Hi Amy.
The office can be a very cruel and draining plaice as you know, are you constantly using a computer screen?, it was drummed into me at a graduate training centre in Liverpool that you should take a 10 minute brake from the screen every hour.
If you are constantly tired then perhaps a health check might not be a bad idea, I am not giving medical advise, but telling you my experience.
In my case I was falling asleep at the wheel and did not realise it, it was only at the end of a very hard day after a police officer pulled me over and said I was wondering all over the road that I checked in with my gp, chronic fatigue was the diagnosis, that police officer may well have saved my life.
Borocca is a good thing to have in the morning dissolved in fruit juice, I add some ginger to the mix, while excellent for overall health, just check with your gp that your antidepressants do not react with the ginger, most unlikely, but better safe then sorry.
Got Ruby again this week, made herself at home in my sleeping bag and I am about to kick her out of it.
Ordered a MiG welder, intend to teach myself to MiG weld and keep my car in one piece.
Spend us much quality time with family members as you can, its good for them as well as you and will help your recovery.
Blessings all.
Timxx
Hi Jess, hopefully the physio will help you, it helped me, it was also so relaxing as well and I could feel the stress just melting away.
I used to find I was still very tired after a sleep, chronic fateager was diagnosed in my case and I was ill for some 18 months with it, it was only after a police lady pointed out to me I was all over the road that made me think somethingn was really wrong, then I went to my gp.
The physical side of grief is know the subject of much research, as the link between the mind and body has know been proved to the satisfaction of western science, the irony is the Chinese knew this thousands of years ago, just as anyone with half a brane did lol!!!
You will not be like that forever Jess, you will find your way through this, invest your time and energy into people important to you, that will help a lot.
Unfortunately grief demands that we work at it, like me building my snug and learning to make candles, doesn’t happen by itself!!.
I 'm sure Dobby understands you, he probably really is your best friend.
Keep your chin up 
Timxx
Hello all,
Tim,
my son plays rugby - he had a match at the weekend but they lost unfortunately.
Cold and rainy here today - a miserable day.
@amyrose92 I also get exhausted - a couple of weeks ago I was really struggling , i don’t sleep brilliantly but this is from grief I am sure - it really takes it out of you. The berrocca does seem to give a boost to be fair , I’ve ran out so need some more .
I also had a nightmare last night about my Dad, basically reliving what happened, so that upset me as soon as I woke up.
How are you @Jess1 ?
xx
1 Like
Hello Laura.
Sorry your son lost, that is part of life, he will have to get used to the nocks.
Not being funny grief exhaustion is very similar to chronic fatigue(I have had that too) and in the early days not only was I grieving, I was clinically ill as well, had no energy and was in my sleeping bag just waiting for the end to come, and I was very close to going under, but I was found, had I not been I would have gone within a week.
The berrocca is good, it helps me a lot and I take it with ginger.
The last thing you need is to relive is your dads passing and that is very difficult, still not come to terms with my mums passing, she died in my arms, and that, is my final memory of her and will stay with me for ever, we were alone in the house at the time and the room went very cold, that would be the spirits, they take the heat out like a heat pump, her passing is now part of me for eternity.
Timxx
Hello all, how are you today?.
Further to the connection between grief and exhaustion, I have found some science on the subject.
Grief changes your brain chemistry, this effects every cell in the body.
It reduces dopamine, causing low mood, boredom and irritation, at the same time stress hormones like cortisol and corticotropin releasing factor, this impacts part of the brain that regulates sleep, body temperature and appetite, also the adrenal glands above the kidneys, while this helps to mobilise the body too much impairs the immune system, grief can also block oxytocin, the brain chemical that gives us a sense of attachment, nurture and warmth, usually activated by smell, human touch,lisening to music or even bonding with a pet, deprived of oxytocin feelings of isolation quickly set in usually , serotonin is also reduced, this is important for feelings of well-being and optimism, a brisk walk in the sun is good for this.(bibliographical ref is page 18, ‘grief, loss and how to cope’ by Christopher Spriggs and Jess Smallwood)
Had my cortisone injection in my knee this morning and advised it may hurt after a couple of hours so I have taken some ANTISIPATORY paracetamol to add to my COMPOUNDED medication(or should I say COMFOUNDED medication ?.told you I have a sense of humour, this is grief academy lol!!)
The Sun is bright and its been a good day, so good to see the sun, and had walk earlier with Ruby(was early for my appointment, an hour!)
Blessings to all, enjoy the day, snow tomorrow is forcast.
Tim xx
Hi Amy, refering to your post 5 days ago had a dream about my parents last night, we were visiting some sort of dancing exebition I think, something my mum was mainly interested in but me and my dad were there as well, the details are a bit vague but the three of us were together and I was getting along ok with my dad who could be a bit difficult with me at times, maybe that was just his way, but I never really felt close to him, you were so lucky to be so loved by both of your parents, to some extent my dad tolerated me because my mum loved me, certainly the case in later years towards his demise from the earth plane.
Any sine of Mr Robin?.
Blessings to all.
Tim xx
Hello again that’s really interesting actually about grief . That explains a lot to
How we are all feeling .
I’ve had a very busy day with work taking my son to and from school and also scouts . I don’t like Wednesdays ! Too much to do !
I will send a longer message tomorrow . Good to see some sun I agree ! Xx
Hello Laura, just trying to push back the boundaries and give people some relevant information that might be helpful, I think like a military man as well as an engineer, in order to defeat your enemy, you first have to know him (Montgomery of Alarmane)
Hope you , your mum, husband and son ok.
KBO
Tim
It’s not too bad as I’m only working 16 hours a week but yes I’m on a laptop when I’m working looking at a screen.
Started a new class with my daughter doing gymnastics she loved it, so that was a nice thing to do this week.
Just trying to be grateful for what I’ve got but missing my mum a lot right now
Amy x