I feel for you all on this site. None of us want to be here. But we all need to be. And I’m very thankful to everyone who writes. Because it does help.
This will be my first Christmas. Without my wonderful husband, And I plan to spend it alone.
Family have asked me what I want to do and alone is my choice.
We used to enjoy Christmas. This year I’ll spend it In my husbands memory.
I plan to still put the tree up. It is Our tree. And all the decorations that go on it were chosen together by us both over many years. It just doesn’t feel right not to still put it up.
I’m looking to focus on our past Christmases with fond memories. Yes there will be tears yes it will be painful. Yes I will miss him beyond belief, But I will be in our home. Where he loved to be, where we were at our happiest, he is still is in every room .
It’s what I’d like to do I don’t want to be a party pooper, or feel out of place and alone in a crowd, or have anyone pity me, so at home I will be, enjoying the tree, that’s given us so much pleasure through the years.
I truly hope your all able to find your own way of putting one foot in front of the other over the festive season. Be kind to yourselves.