Hi all. I live in the North East of Scotland. My husband passed away in April this year, he was a young 67.
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I lost my husband in may. I cannot face going back to work yet. I go to same shops, same charity shops every day for company and a bit of conversation with cashier if i buy anything. I had a procedure on my back last week, not been out since yet, i am even more lonely.
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Morning and it is a nice area near to so many nice places Whitby is a nice place to visit we were always going for days out meals holidays .So sad we will never do any things together again xxx
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I was brought up in west London and we moved here 19 years ago to brundall xx
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Not the same village as I was in but Brundall is very nice. I was in Martham so a slightly different direction I think.
We’ve done a similar thing to each other in reverse. I was in Norfolk and went to West London/Middlesex (Twickenham) for university where I met John. We ended up in West Sussex 15 years ago.
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Wow my husband was called John as well. Martham is a beautiful village by the coast. Lived in Ealing which was very nice at the time but has changed so much now.
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I know West Ealing a bit as John was a semi -pro photographer and he used a lab there many years ago to get his photographs developed. We did a wedding at Ealing Abbey as far as I remember as well.
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I went to Whitby once at the height of summer. It was very nice and incredibly busy. Whenever we went to Yorkshire we stayed in a small village called Dishforth. We spent a lot of time on the North Yorkshire Moors Railway and in Goathland (Heartbeat Country).
I know what you mean about it being sad. It will be bittersweet if I ever make it to Yorkshire and also, I think it will be quite some time until I can manage to go to the Isle of Wight (our last holiday back in 2019). But I’m surrounded by memories in my home town anyway. One day I will try to go to these places again.
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Hi Heidi i know all those places in north Yorkshire they all hold memories for me of nice days out with Graham but every where does we spent our 17 years having loads of holidays in the uk and abroad .We were in Rome last year at this time ,he was poorly then but was the last thing on his bucket list .He declined rapidly after that and died in april and its still so raw i miss him more now and carnt see how time will heal .
I suppose that it was something Graham did at least get to do the last thing on his bucket list. I am so sorry for your (comparatively) recent loss.
I’m not sure that time does heal exactly, but it may help, As I’m approaching 3 years since John died, I suppose if time hasn’t healed it has helped me learn coping strategies, which don’t make the pain go away, but they do make it easier to bear even if I still miss John every second of every minute of every day. My main coping strategy is distraction coupled with a determination to prove to John (if he is out there somewhere) that I can cope on an emotional level because he was worried about that. I think it also means that I have shut down a little emotionally and I now don’t feel things in general as much as I used to. But I get by. Somehow.
In the months after John died, I felt very much as you do now and had to take it a day at a time but those days do add up.
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Thankyou so much it does help knowing what you and other people have been through and how you have coped and im sorry for your loss too .It is early days for me its a bad time of year i guess.Grahams birthday and Chrietmas round the corner .xx
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We should get any of us that want to still go on holiday but not alone to meet up somewhere for a few days to be able to chat cry and laugh.
It would be nice to meet somebody that knows how we feel. Life is now taking us all down a new path that we didnt choose, but maybe we can do it together.
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Hi @HeidiT,
Thanks for your post. It is really helpful.
It will be two years come January since my lovely wife Christine died. This second year has been and remains truly horrendous. My hope is to find an accommodation with my grief whereby we can both co-exist as it’s dawning on me that it is never going to leave me.
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Hi punto that is a good idea difficult to organize i guess we are all in different locations but wouldnt it be something to look forward to in 2024 .Anybody got any ideas ?.xxx
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Hi julie im in leek staffordshire i lost my husband steve it will be 4 months on tuesday 
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Hi Punto ,
I think this is a fab idea ,i hope those who want to and are able to travel really consider this,perhaps we could start a group initially to see who is interested ,im in shropshire ,moving to Cumbria next month about 10 miles from Carlisle near Brampton , x
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This is a great idea. I’d be up for it depending on when/where it is and how much it costs.
I have to rely on public transport because I can’t drive but I’ve been all over the country on trains so that’s not an issue for lots of places.
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Hi i dont drive either but if its doable on public transport im in north Yorkshire .xx
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,Perhaps we could all introduce our selves , without giving to much away for safety reasons or start a private or on here group and give it a Title ,let people know where we are approx ,who can drive ,who is able to pick up others ,how far and how easy is it for people to travel, it woll take some organisation ,but it is doable and will give us a focus .
As i said im moving to Cumbria ,not far from boarder of Northumberland, im very familiar with ,catterick ,thirsk ,malton, Northallerton ,too, but I drive as well ,semi retired ,60 next year ,even if it takes months of planning or seperate people form seperate groups ,we need this ,or I certainly do x
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I am 60 and can drive anywhere. I dont work at the moment as took a year off to look after my hubby and to travel, cancer had other ideas and I only got 4 months with him. York might be a good place to meet we will all need to have a think but I am up for meeting and making new friends that eont judge if you cry at silly things.
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