Welcome back Pezasgirl
Your post is so so true
Exactly how I am feeling
Totally lost and as you say
Left behind……….
Xx
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Evening @Bess1
It’s in an article about grief that I read recently. I know tears don’t remove the pain from losing our beloved but I somehow feel a little less intense after a good cry though.
Sending love & hugs X
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Hi Angel1309
Yes I suppose now you say that so do I ( in a way)
Still blooming tough tho as we all know
Xx
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Reach out with kindness and understanding. Share your presence, listen without judgment, and offer support. Remind them they are not alone, and encourage seeking professional help if needed. Small gestures can make a big difference. Connect, empathize, and let them know they matter.
Thanks
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Welcome dmi124
Have and welcome
Yes sound advice……… if only more folk would practice that we’d all ‘feel’ a little ‘better’ maybe…….?
Xx
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Yes, still blooming tough - couldn’t agree more and nothing we can do but cry and get on!
Sending strength & hugs X
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So true unfortunately
Xx
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My counsellor told me grief is the price of love 
Xx
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Angel1309, that’s very true 
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@Scamp1
what are we to do? It hurts so much .
Feel exactly the same, everyone saying best to go back to work, and yes I did but at Christmas I took time out and haven’t wanted to go back to meet people, I get anxious and can make no decisions whatsoever, I put on a brave act saying I’m ok but totally lost and alone😔
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Hi Carpol, many of us put on brave face & say we’re ok when we definately are not. I say it more than ever now cos feel people don’t want to hear that i’m not ok.
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Yea ask how are you, but you feel you can’t say exactly how you feel as they don’t/ won’t understand , or it that just me ?
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Was, starting to get my head almost in order and going back to work Monday, if I can keep my tears!! Step (my) daughter messaged tonight, did urn necklace with wife’s ashes last weekend, think reality sank in, poor girl, she’s seen I’m a mess and I try, but kid is as concerned about me! Love her, little star!
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@Carpol I didn’t go back to work, I’d worked at the same place for 15 years & although Derek didn’t work there, he was very much part of my work day routine. He’d taken early retirement so used to get my stuff ready for breakfast & do me a fruit box that my colleagues used to share. We spoke every lunchtime & he’d welcome me home at the door. I took a sabbatical & then Covid hit & as I couldn’t work from home ( we’d downsized to a small flat as I was supposed to be taking early retirement myself in March 2020 & we were moving to Spain) I was furloughed. After that I decided to still retire as I couldn’t face going back & my desk still be as I left it before he passed away, just before Christmas on the day of our works Christmas do. Remember like yesterday having to call them to say we wouldn’t be going. Sorry I’m rambling but my point is it what works for some doesn’t work for everyone. Our lives , as they were, ended when their lives ended & finding a way forward is the hardest thing we’ll ever have to do. Especially as we don’t really want to. I’m 4 years on, it still hurts but I have learned to carry the pain better. I do feel like I’m just going through the motions but I am finding joy in life again but it’ll always be tinged with sadness
Love & strength 
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No Carpol, not just you, as long as i say i’m fine, it’s great, if i dare to say i’m struggling, either stupid comments are made or the subject is changed quickly. I don’t get the chance to talk about how i feel, so now i don’t even try, just bottle it up & plod on.
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Welcome Carpol………
Yes Jodel I’m 18 months in this bloody awful situation we find ourselves in
I don’t say I’m fine
But it’s hard or I’m struggling
But as you say folks don’t know what to say and it’s a response they don’t want to hear
They’d much prefer to Gera fine or ok
But ( sorry for all the buts) I’m not going to tell them a lie just to make them feel better
I like all of us feel very alone lonely and lost
I ‘belong’ to no one
I was Paul’s and he was mine and now just me
I know I’m expected to ‘find’ a path or a life but I yearn for the one I had big time
I’m exsisting and treading water …… deep water
Lolxx
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Gera should read hear!
Xx
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I’ve been in my job 16 years and I’ve got to back to my desk as I left it at one thirty five on 13/12/23 when I was told. Lads are lovely but all knew Cath, dreading Monday, but will have to get back at some point
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It’s a constant struggle, but sometimes I don’t want to talk as I get too emotional and I know I shouldn’t but I block/ deny it has happened, my husband had been struggling for years and that’s what I’ve been used doing putting a brave face on and blocking people out, but it’s mentally exhausting 
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