You’re so right Pete. That’s a good way of putting it.
A day at a time is all we can do x
Decided to call in local pub, just to not spend so much time alone, actually made me feel worse, letting Shell down, trying to socialise, but , just can’t move forward, feel so lost, stumbling, have to accept, just me now,.
Take care. X
Every step forward is such hard work, added by the fact that there is no comfort from our actions despite our desperate need to find some from somewhere.
I find it easier to do things that wasn’t about us rather then do anything that was. It makes the pain to raw to try and live our old life.
It’s not the going out that’s the problem for me, it’s the coming home to an empty house that I struggle with.
Where do we go from here I wonder
Take care xxx
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I am looking for something, but I can’t find it, is it comfort, I don’t know. I promised Shell, I would be okay, but honestly I’m not, most of the time, I pretend I am good, in company, no problems, then reality kicks in, on my own, basically Shell, I need you, my reason to live, , you had to go, but you couldn’t invite me , on that journey.
Take care.
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Awwwww, Pete…that’s so true…they had to go but couldn’t invite us on that final journey.
Life is so sad.
Feel the same as you, think I always will xx
Hi Pete
I feel every single thing that you feel and like you it rips me apart. My wife was my life we never needed anyone else and that depth of love and companionship makes this so much harder as there is such a vast empty space. I do have grandchildren and my wife’s wish was don’t let them forget me and l don’t. Unfortunately l don’t work anymore retired and was going to have many happy years but it was not to be.
It has been 6 months now and l sit and cry every day and l am not a weak man but this has crushed me, l struggle to sleep and end up going to bed at 2pm and up again at 6am exhausted. I just cannot accept that l will never see her again to talk to her hold her and look after her and share so many things everyday.
Look after yourself Pete
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Fortunately, I am still at work, 3 years before I retire, they have bean my rock, I had to isolate twice last year, so had some introduction into completely lonely days, one day at a time, is best, trying to think beyond that, is too difficult. Take care.
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@PeteE59 hi Pete sorry I missed your post. I also tend to focus on losing a partner. It’s been just over 7 months for me since I lost pauline. I miss her so much and feel nothing but pain and emptiness. We promised eachother that which ever one of us went first the other would keep going for our pets, so that’s what I’m doing for them and her. She once told me that if she went first she would want me to be happy even if that meant moving on with someone else. That is something I can’t give her because there will never be anyone else. My heart belongs to pauline and always will. I have very little to no contact with others apart from on here. Family don’t bother with me and we didn’t have friends so I know how hard the loneliness is as I’m very isolated. There is not a day that goes by where I don’t think about her she is my first and last thought every day and throughout the day. I want to be with her so badly and just want my time to come. I’m 55 and I feel like my life is over it means nothing without her but I have to keep my promise no matter how hard it is for me. This community really is caring and please just know you are not alone we are all here to support and help eachother. You are welcome to message me anytime. Take care Pete sending you a hug x
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Hiya, yeah, try to move on, I have stopped trying ( not that I really did) to find comfort in another relationship, because it would be empty one, found the one, but she had to go. I have 4 year old granddaughter to concentrate on, promised Shell , I would take care of. I have a son from a previous relationship, he has come out as transgender, and is seriously considering, actually changing his gender, so I need to be here for him/ her. So I should put my personal heartache , to one side, I know Shell would want that. Probably like many others, each morning, brings the pain of going on, without , the one thing that mattered the most.
Take care,and thank you.
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@PeteE59 you are welcome all we can do is take one day at a time. I do what I have to not much else. I’m not sure if we can put the pain to one side as it’s always with us as are our loved ones. We were lucky and blessed to have found the one. Take care Pete x
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Maybe a strange notion, but Granddaughter, believes Nannie is in the sky, she controls the weather, and many other things, so I look up sometimes, and talk to the sky. I hope we have the strength to keep going, sometimes I do wonder, where it is going to come from .
Take care. X
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My first year, well, so much time alone, Covid meant I had to isolate, actually in the room, where I found her body, I tried CPR, but failed, I haven’t really spoken to anyone about that day, I am a council tenant, so I had to move, a now single guy , in a 3 bedroom house, Shell was my 2nd relationship, she should of bean my first, but that’s how life is I guess. She was only 51 , but her passing, must have given her some release, so much illness in the last few years. As for me, well, I promised her I would be strong, look after our granddaughter, she told me to go out and have a life, because she had stopped me from having one. I pray she is somewhere, enjoying herself,
Take care.
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Well, another day draws to a close, much like any other, think I am getting used to these lonely evenings, I have messaged people, but , it’s going through the motions, at work tomorrow, I will play the class clown, its what I do, great acting, we people on here, always will have a part of us missing, some will get through, showing a different face , to the outside world different from the true one inside. Take care all, we all have the one thing in common, a loss , an emptiness, that can’t be filled.
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Yes another day of trying our best.
False smile, endless empty void.
Take care xx
Yes, another morning with that familiar sick feeling in the stomach and that empty place next to you in the bed.
Just another day…
Xx
I escape to work, some kind of normality, who would of thought, I enjoy work, more than time at home( use the word loosely). Take care, hope the day passes, as well as it can x
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I feel your pain. 8 months since Gail was taken from at 49. We had been together 28 years. Am so lucky to be blessed with 3 beautiful daughters and an amazing grandson but selfishly its hard to appreciate it some days like today where all I want is her back
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8 months today for me as well since my husband went out in the evening and never came back. He was only 50. Still can’t believe life can just be wiped out like that - mine and his.
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Heartbreaking for you. So very sorry xx
Life can be so unfair, deep respect, my deepest condolences, easy to say, harder to do, take each day as it comes, 19 months, since I lost Shell, it gets more bearable, but never right.
Take care.
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