They look amazing @Lisa_L51 . I might do something like this for my daughter, she is 22 but loves a teddy bear, I can get her to pick some clothing of my moms. My kids have struggled these last couple of days.
Today was ok with my brother, I just feel so much exhausted and overwhelmed.
I hope you are doing ok. X
I’m doing ok had a sob whilst I was cooking but, we got through today the best we could but it wasn’t the same and never will be a big part of our family was missing mum loved Christmas with the girls especially when they were growing up and I could sense they missed her today as did we all it just wasn’t the same xx
@Lisa_L51 we felt the same. My kids missed her too and they said it just wasn’t the same. My mom made Christmas special and I tried so hard, I used to love Christmas but the magic has gone. It just felt empty.
Well that just wasn’t Boxing Day for me . It was always family time . Left over turkey with all the little trimmings and party food . We would get together brothers , sisters . My mum and dad loved it ( my dad so he could drink again the sod ) but I spent it alone not wanting to be around anyway turned my phone off at times . This isn’t life as I know it it’s changed forever and I hate it . I can’t stop wandering what mums doing and if they really can watch us . I know you all miss your mums/ dads just as much but the pain just never eases at all the entire day through . I’m all cried out x
Yeah I didn’t feel like it was Christmas to be honest no laughter just my girls arguing we tried our best and we got through it but all the while we were missing her, we talked about her and what she might be doing I said she’ll be sitting back watching me stress and making sure I done everything the way she did, all I can say mum is I hope I done it the way you would I think I did and I never poisoned anyone xx
I feel so flat today. don’t know what to do with myself. I am lay on the sofa in my pj’s. Think I am just exhausted from it all.
It’s a miracle we had any kind of Christmas to be honest. The dinner was great, but it happened.
I know my mom made me the person I am today, but I don’t feel I have done a good job to make things nice this Christmas. I feel like I have lost hope.
You’ve done the very best you could in the midst of your grief, even if it doesn’t feel like that right now. 
I hear you regarding the pain. It doesn’t relent, it gets worse. I don’t know if it’s better or not to have a family around you, I know you all struggle so much in spite of that, but trying to distract myself from the pain alone is really hard to handle.
Hugs!
I am lay on the sofa thinking how am I supposed to be able to come to terms with this, to be able to have any kind of life without my mom? I am back at work on 8th Jan and I have to go back to my full hours and just crack on with it. I am dreading it, it’s such a toxic environment. I have to work as we need the money and I am also studying as part of my job,
The honest truth is my life will never be the same again. I get scared that one day my dad will die, sometimes I go to sleep scared that I won’t wake up. I have so much anxiety around my mom’s death.
Struggling a lot with if onlys again today. Thoughts that he might have been here now if not for things they missed at the hospital. I’ll never know if it could’ve been different, but those thoughts are painful in the extreme.
@Ulma I totally know how you feel. I keep thinking if only. I feel so lonely without my mom. She was my best friend. I know we shouldn’t beat ourselves up about these things but when you miss someone so much the if onlys flood in.
Ulma, I’m the same as you. Feeling despondent and wondering if things would be different if it hadn’t taken several months to find out his diagnosis 
Ulma, have you mentioned a sibling? If so, are you close?
One sibling. I can’t talk to him about things, unfortunately, he’s more the practical type.
You should be able to trust your doctors, but they so often let you down.
I know, it doesn’t help to beat ourselves up, but it’s easier said than done. Hugs!
I am dreading new year, I struggle anyway. But I don’t want 2023 to end. I know it has been hell, but it was the year where my mom was still alive. She still lived & when it ends I feel like another piece is ripped away.
I’m the same I’m due back at work the 8th of Jan but I just can’t do it yet I can’t move on I’m scared to, I think the medication is only just starting to work as I went through 4 days of side effects and pains in my stomach and chest from the anxiety meds it’s calmed down now I’m not in any pain today just mental pain
@Lisa_L51 i feel the same, but I don’t feel I have a choice. Work have just been so unsupportive and I am worried about my job. Even though I have done nothing wrong.
Medication is hard when you first take it, I remember it well. I had one of mine increased a few weeks ago and it was horrible. I’d forgotten what it felt like.
I am seeing my GP on 11th Jan & may ask for another increase of my mood is still off.
I feel so lost. I hope the medications starts to work for you soon. Take care
Ulma, they do - so many of us on here share the same concern. I’m sorry that your brother isn’t someone you can confide to. Have you looked at bereavement support / counselling? It’s so difficult to know what will be helpful.