Thinking of you. It’s so devastating losing a parent. I don’t know how anyone learns to live with the loss, it just doesn’t make sense that they are suddenly not there any more.
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I find I get sadder when it’s bedtime. Thinking I have had to ge through another day without my mom and I have to wake up tomorrow to do it all again 
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I cry on a daily basis it just comes in waves constantly and i lost the love of my life 3 months ago (miss her so much it hurts) and its a fact there is no end to the sorrow my grief seems on the turn to deep depression and a full happy bustling home is now an empty lonely house a shell just wondering what to do or how to survive there cannot be a mental pain to match it.
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I just started crying at bedtime, after days of feeling numb. You stop being busy and still your mind, and the tears flow…
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I think because it gets quiet of a night you start to think more were through the day you try and keep busy if you have the energy too I find if I’m busy I don’t think a lot unless I’m around constant reminders especially if I’m checking on my dad, I can see her everywhere xx
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Oh no. Or maybe it’s a good thing? I haven’t started yet, but there’s still a little time.
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Does anyone else get the wanting to crawl out of your skin feeling? Like an intense need to just get out and away from yourself?
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Yes, frequently. Anything to escape the pain.
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No I sometimes just want to walk away from my life then realise if I do I’ll only be taking my grief with me.
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Good morning all
Terrible night waking at 1 again just gone 3 then again at 5 I feel shattered still
I don’t know if I’m causing wishing and wanting a sign from my mum or for her to visit me in my dreams x
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My sleep pattern has changed so many times in the last 3 months since i lost the love of my life…either short sleeps and wake in panic or with tablets go to bed late wake up late with no energy to function thats one rwason a return to work seems impossible i would like a good sleep routine but seems like miles off one no sleep or too much no energy drained brain fog lack of interest sorrow not ready at all for the workplace
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My sleep is quite broken at the moment I’ve gone back to waking up about 1.30am when I stayed in my mum’s over Christmas and new year I slept right through maybe I should move in with my dad I seemed more settled there even though there is constant reminders of my mum around me, we havnt packed up her stuff yet, I feel it comforting that her bedroom is left the way it was to be honest or maybe I’m wrong, maybe it’s just causing me more heartbreak seeing her stuff knowing she won’t be back.
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Hi Lucy I hear and understand your exact thoughts regards everything your going through
No I like you haven’t touched mums room and I don’t think I will . It’s now a spare room it breaks my heart to say but it will always be mums room , some say in time make it your own but I don’t need to and like you I find comfort in it being the way she left it and I’ve no intentions to ever touch it x
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I have not and will not disrupt the way my partner had the room,the house her clothes i just dont feel the need its like a memorial in a way if i change everything iam getting rid of the memory in time i suppose over time it may need updating and sorting it took my sister who lost her husband 3 year before touching or moving his clothes if you can just let things stay until you feel the necessity to alter things.
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Wish you didn’t feel that way, but good to know I’m not alone. 
The numbness has disappeared now, so I’m back to weeping again.
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True enough, we can’t escape from it anywhere.
Big hugs to all of you. Its such a horrible jour ey to be on isnt it! Grief is an unknown thing and a tough thing to be dealing with x
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Nightmares about the hospital for me, instead of signs. 
I keep waking up every few hours as well, never getting a full night’s sleep.
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I’m so sorry for your loss. The house is lonely and empty for me too, as dad and I lived together. It’s such an indescribable pain.
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