Thank you.xx
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@AlliH Yes it’s going to be a tough call tomorrow but it has to be done. That’s the pragmatist in me…
It’s not all at one house I’ve just heard a friends husband taken to the Hospice three days back n no visitors today. My heart goes out to her. This only started just after Xmas. It’s not going to be long wait for her now…
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@AlliH
Thank you. I hope so. Feeling like this takes it out of you doesn’t it. Xx
I did try to get counseling, but most places are overwhelmed, and it’s hard to even get on a waiting list. I was told to go back to my doctor for help, but honestly, being here and talking to everyone has been a source of comfort.
I feel exhausted—grief takes so much out of you.
I have three years left until retirement. I used to look forward to those days, imagining the moments I would spend with my wife—holding hands, going out together, just enjoying life. But that future is gone now.
Mal, I love you, and I miss you so much it hurts.
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@Yorkie247
Bless you love. I’ve been quite lucky with the counselling. I managed to join a bereavement group at Western park cancer hospital. It has helped talking to people going through the same situation. But as you say they are very overwhelmed which brings me to the question why when everyone in their lifetime will go though loss is there not more of them? You have such a barrage of emotions it is exhausting. And after you sit there drained you start missing your partner more. It’s hard love. At least on here we can share our feelings. I’m missing my beloved hubby so much today. Xx
Thanks Tenpin, you would think there would be more help out there.
But we do have each other on here to help.
I have joined so many different groups and found this to be the best one for forum chat. I also find Samaritans and Shout to be very good if I need to speak to someone on the phone or by email.
Sometimes think about contacting Samaritans or shout but never know how to start . . Grief is so exhausting it seems never ending I feel am going backwards . Still can’t comprehend he is gone and in my mind I talk to him .
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I can only deal with messaging, talking is too hard. The doctor gave me some helplines to call when it gets too much but I find it a lot more difficult to be honest when speaking to someone. I either pretend everything is ok or am so overcome I cant speak anyway. Plus, I have terrible mobile reception so can’t hear most of whats said anyway! Day 1 of year 2 today and it’s definitely getting worse.
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Hi Tenpin
Is the bereavement group a group of people going through the same thing? Is it organised by one or two counsellors over a number of weeks? I’ve found one like that up here and thinking about joining this rather than a 1to 1 session.
@Beachwalks Speak to him out loud darlin. I’ve just arrived at my beloved partner Johns house and walked in shouted Hi like I always did and talked to him as though he’s here and I believe he is here. One day I’ll realise it’s just bricks n mortar but the memories are all around his and my house…
@Mitzi1
I do exactly the same. I shout out when I’m going out I won’t be long and when I come back I shout I’m home love. It helps me a little. I also have conversations with him out loud and in my head. I wish he’d answer me. Xx
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@Numb1
It’s a group where anyone who’s bereaved for however length of time can join. There’s just one councillor and she opens up different stages of grief and other topics and it just takes off from there. Everyone is encouraged to speak. If anyone gets upset and crys which we generally do everyone comforts eachother. All of got words of encouragement and we are there for eachother. You can swap numbers and meet up outside the group and make friends. It was a 6 week course but another one will be starting the other side of Sheffield. Harder for me to get to but I’m going to go. I’ve found it a big help. Try it. X
@Yorkie247
I’ve wondered about phoning shout. Are they help? I don’t know how they work. Xx
I will thanks
Its 2 years in april since he died but im still talking to him every single day and carnt see that changing .I beleve he can some how hear me and dont care what people think its my grief and you have to do what brings yoy comfort and closeness to that person .And it does .Grief is just love with no where to go they say if thats true this grief will always be with me .Sending love and support to all on this journey xx
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I agree, grief is love with no where to go. If I have loved, and love, I will grieve forever
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@Pooka1968 @Hope5
What beautiful sentiments from both of you. How very very true. X
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I do the same to my wife I go out or come home and say hi babe how are you, I tell her where I have been and I ask her if she is ok. I try to talk to her like she is still there.
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It’s a person that’s been trained to help you and to listen and advise. I phoned them at 2 AM one morning and found them very helpful.
When I’ve been out a walk with the dog , I miss the voice asking me where did you walk to day as Jim always used to ask as soon as I came in the kitchen door , it’s just silence now , I leave the tv on so at least there is something in the background.