Good night all
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That’s mega early sending a 
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You’ll be awake at 2pm..
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Thanks so much for checking and to be honest better than I thought I would be.
I’m actually at a ladies curry night at the church tonight and even though I feel awful with this cough etc I think a curry might just sweat it out of me and the company is lovely..
Hope you are feeling as good as you can..
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That is very early, hope you get a good night sleep
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Hi nightwish1,
I hope you are ok?i will be thinking of you tomorrow .
Take care
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The words are lovely and so true too.thank you for sharing them with us.i hope your day has been more bearable today.
Take care.
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Mitzi1,
I hope you have managed to get through today.I hope you were able to find some peace too and some happy memories.It really is a hard road we have to travel on now.grief really does have no time limit or direction.just as i think i am not doing too bad then it all hits me again.
Take care.
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Hi brummy,
Thank you for thinking about me. I hope you are ok. I hope you manage your shopping ok, tomorrow I know it’s stressful for you.
I’m really missing Sue today. A bad wave day feel like it’s pushing me out to sea.
Take care.
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Hi Nightwish1
Its been another groundhog type week with this new life we have to endure now.Tomorrow i will going to Shropshire where i used to live to visit my mum and dads grave for his birthday on 12th and to take some flowers for Mothers day.My dear wife loved when we lived in shropshire until we moved here to be with her mum.It will be another emotional day tomorrow, i so miss my dear wife and my mum and dad.I often think i have no one now only my wifes sister and some cousins.
I am so sorry you have had a bad day.This grief is horrible , it has no timeline or direction, it can hit us anywhere at anytime thats what i am finding.Just as i think i am not doing too bad it hits me again.you described it so well pushing you out to sea.Even now after 12 months i still ask WHY? but i suppose i will never get a proper answer.Our life and ourselves have changed forever and i know i will never be the same again but we have to do our best take things step by step, minute by minute moment by moment thats all we can do really.Its the loneliness and emptyness i find so hard too.Where this house was once full of joy and hapiness its now sadness.
Please look after yourself.
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Thanks so much.
I’ve been ok to be honest and just come back from ladies curry night at church and it was a lovely couple of hours.
Yesterday and Wednesday afternoon a totally different story but like us all I’ve come through it..
Let’s hope we all manage a good sleep..
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Morning John and morning everyone 
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Morning Everyone
Hope you all have the best day you can
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Morning everyone,
wishing you a day with some peace and comfort x
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Good morning everyone I am having a bad week I was at a hospital appointment on Monday this hospital is where my wife used to work I would allways take her to work in the morning and pick her back up as I was walking in to the place I felt the tears just coming on I am just so sad that she is not with me she would have been there for me I never go to the hospital but 2 years ago I had a scare I was told I could have had cancer I had to get tests done my beautiful wife was allways by my side now I am really really struggling on my own every memory every place we have been together every shops that we would go to is really really hard as all I can think about is my wife I am finding it really hard now as the spring is hear and the days are longer I just think of my wife and I doing things together in the lovely spring time last year we where organised a new fence in our back garden we where making plans to do things together I still cry everyday and every memory is still so raw it really hurts I miss her so so much I keep saying why that day she was absolutely fine that day we went away for our wedding anniversary the forever home we have built together is just so so sad now just like me every morning I struggle getting up knowing I ha e to do it all again the pain the hurt the memories of us we would both be getting ready together every morning for work together having tea talking about our day ahead and coming home from work to an empty house is crippling me the first thing we would do is welcome each other home make tea sit on the sofa chatting about our days with a biscuit or maybe a wee cake I still replay that full day together the trumma we where ment to grow old together and enjoy we where allways just trying to make things easier for us as we got older now I am stuck hear so alone scared frightened of everything it has been 42 weeks today since I last spoke to her and I just cant cope without hearing her I talk every day to her but the silence is killing me I was hearing ppl talk the other day about how nice it is to have longer days but for me all my plans and future has gone I am so so heartbroken shattered emotional tearfull all the time I just really really miss. Her I still cant accept that she was taken so young we where both 50 and I just cant stop thinking about her I am so so sorry if I have been rambling on but it’s just been a really hard week I hate the weekends to as we did absolutely everything together I miss my wife asking me for advice on things or me asking her things I just wish I could be with her so so much again I must apologise for me rambling but I am truly struggling please try have a peaceful day take care
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Hi Love01
It’s okay to ramble. That’s what this space is for. How you are feeling, your memories and how much you are struggling right now is all valid and it’s good that you have shared it here so it’s not just going round and round in your head and your heart.
I know what you mean when you say how hard it is to see the signs of Spring and the start of longer days and sunshine. My partner loved this time of year and the garden. He would always show me any signs of new life outside and would start making garden plans.
We also would spend happy days out together. If the sun was shining we would think of somewhere to go. Now, when I see couples hand in hand, just being together, it breaks my heart that we have been torn apart and I have to carry on without him.
People have said to me that the sunny weather will help etc. I just want to scream or laugh at them. But they really don’t understand how it’s devastating me at the moment.
I wish I could say something to ease your pain, but all I can say is I know some of your pain too and I appreciate you sharing. Sending a big hug and hope you find some peace to get you through the day. X
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Don’t worry about rambling at all. Dear Love01, you have just described my life with my Ray too. Getting ready together for work, looking forward to getting home and talking about our day with a cuppa. We did everything together and hated being apart.
I’m like you, so lost and feel as if my heart has been torn to shreds. 20 weeks for me and the loneliness is unbearable.
Keep sharing your thoughts here, we are all here for one another and know what you’re going through.
Take good care x
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Dear Plop, I know what you mean about springtime. My Ray would come in one day and say ‘saw the first swallow today’. He loved nature and animals. Was so kind and thoughtful. Like you I want to shout at the next person who says ‘at least the weather is nice, you’ll feel much better now’. No I won’t!
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You ramble if you need to and if it helps so much the better.
You are missing your wife terribly as we all miss our loved ones.
You say you are not coping with not hearing her voice but guess what…you are coping, you are still here and going to work, coming home, shopping, eating if you fancy and posting on here so we can all try and help if we can.
It’s all the worse just now because you have had to go to hospital without your wife but she is within you, in your heart helping you and I really hope that you are doing ok and the news from the hospital is not bad..
Keep posting as we are reading..
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