Wel Done Pat I love dancing too and have just joined a jive class I love it and it does me the world of good. I have in the past done salsa line dancing tap dancing and ballet when I was younger. So glad you enjoyed yourself I find it really does help lift the mood.
Heart break
Dear Pat , well done!!
I feel so proud of you ! I think it is wonderful you had the courage to go, to stay and to dance. And above all you had the courage to do something that will help you to live a more contented life
Well done!!!
Girl, you are full of surprises! Dancing on competitions / shows etc
Lots of love
Sadie xxx
Yes, dancing is a great help. When Brian died I just couldn’t dance anymore. But with time I started again, just at home but that is where I feel comfortable as I get older. I can still jump around like a teenager but would probably be laughed at now. I was comfortable at the dance session I went to yesterday as they was all the same age group. Some hadn’t a clue but what did it matter they was out and exercising.
I was a young mum and when my children were in their teens I was very often at the same dance as them. My daughter hated it, I was a better dancer than her and she used to tell me to go home and do some knitting or something. I was still in my thirties!!!. She did secretly like watching me and her dad jive together and although we split up when they was toddlers we still met up from time to time to dance together. I taught my son to dance and told him that he would never be without a partner if he could dance well. I found this when I started going out to dances as a teen. He told everyone that his ‘old woman’ had taught him to dance when he was praised for his dancing. So, that is why I dance at home only now. I would love to go to a jive class and we do have rock and roll dances on the Island but I don’t want to be ‘Billy no mates’ and be alone. So don’t go. Yes I started out with Tap, acrobatics and Ballet. Disco dancing and Line dancing when I met Brian as he was a Country and Western singer. For those of you that are ancient like me, when I was a little child and taken to the pictures, I loved musicals and still do. I thought of going back to tap classes but nothing near me.
Can’t wait for next week and another session. Us oldies (sorry if your not one) can still shake a leg.
Pat
Yes, Sadie, I loved to dance and my mother sent me to dancing classes when I was very young. I loved it. My dancing instructor hired us kids out to shows if children were needed and I wanted to be a professional dancer but didn’t grow tall enough. As horses were taking over my life I then decided I wanted to be an international show jumper but never did make it with either ambitions, so a failure… I worked in an office (which I hated at first but father insisted) and then nursing, back to office later again married at seventeen and became a mum, two failed marriages before meeting the true love of my life in Brian, a lovely man, so no regrets in later life. Makes me laugh now when I think back to how I wanted my life and how it turned out.
Love to you
Pat xxx
Wow Pat - you have such a varied life - you are probably a very good dinner guest with all your varied stories of your life
I am afraid I don’t have any of these exciting things in my life
Today I signed the papers for acquisition of the house I will move too. It is the right thing but I do feel emotional. Very strange to leave so much behind and to move without Jack. The move will be sometime next year as the house needs some work done
Hope you had a good day
Sadie xx
Hi Pat,
Thank you for replying it sounds very interesting what you have done and I’m so pleased you were also able to show your son how to dance, he must of made you feel proud to. It did make me smile when you said your daughter did not want you in the same class, my son would be horrified if we were in the same class together. I also loved gymnastics when young and my ambition was to be a professional but sadly that was not to be. My life has been mostly spent in offices not really my cup of tea but paid some of the bills. Its funny the different directions our lives take us. Keep dancing Pat I hope you enjoy your next class. My partner was no dancer always said he had two left feet, but we had lots of other things in common and we were happy together for 26 years,. Hopefully he would be looking down on e and be encouraging me to dance as he knew it was my passion. I’m sure will be looking down on you to and be saying go for it Pat.
Heartbreak
That’s wonderful - Well Done You! Next week it will be so much easier and pretty soon you’ll wonder why you were nervous at all.
Like, you, I was terrified about going for my first guitar lesson, but my teacher is just lovely and so patient. He asked me why I was taking up guitar again so I told him - not in any great detail - and he just nodded and asked what Clive’s favourite bands/songs were. We (he) decided that most Pink Floyd songs were a bit too advanced for now (How surprising!) so I’m learning some Beatles songs (Blackbird and Norwegian Wood). I’m actually looking forward to coming home and practicing every night - I usually dread the long evenings at home on my own, but that’s starting to change - I feel positive about something for the first time and I’m sure you’ll feel that way about your dancing. Go Us!
Dear Skywise
I’m taking Spanish evening classes because our family has a place in Mallorca my husband loved to be …so doing this is both practical and makes me feel connected to him and gives me something to think about as do besides work and everything else expected of me every day
Love Romy xxxxx
I’ve said previously that I had thought about learning to play Brian’s keyboard but was surprised how expensive the lesson’s are, so re-thinking. I sold off Brian’s guitars and wondering if I did the right thing. What I can’t understand is why didn’t I ask Brian to teach me. I watched him often enough playing. We would have probably ended up arguing (or at least I would) as I haven’t much patience.
I hope Brian is watching me dancing again. He used to watch me doing dancing/exercising/yoga in the dining room and sometimes tried to copy me. But he had three left feet and no sense of rhythm. Which I found surprising as he was a singer. Sometimes when he was on stage I would see him moving really well as he sang but when not singing and without a guitar in his hand he looked so funny. When I decided to learn to line dance he came with me to watch but because he was a well know Country and Western singer locally it was expected that he could dance as well, poor Brian being dragged up to dance so I stopped the classes.
Well done to you all for making that supreme effort to take up new things.
Pat xxx
I don’t really think of it as being varied. I just plodded through life, making all sorts of mistakes and moving on to something else when one thing didn’t work out. Funnily enough when I’m out I never mention my past life as I don’t think of it as being anything different from other people. To mention it now is unusual I just feel at ease talking on the forum it’s surprising what comes back to you.
My mother gave up on me years ago as I was rather a free spirit. I never did anything wrong but I did do what I wanted and very determined. She was delighted when I got married at seventeen, I was out of her way. She did say “You’ve made your bed now you can sleep in it”, in other words don’t come back to me for any help and I never did. I think back and came to realise that I have had to pick up the threads of a failed life before, but can I do it again.
Well done on the house move. I am still considering it but just haven’t got the enthusiasm to be bothered. Which is unlike me. You are doing well, so the very best of luck.
Pat x xx
Dear Pat , well I don’t know many people that did dancing shows, had 3 marriages etc etc . It really shows your resilience and your strength
Hope your day was good today
Sadie xx
Hi Sadie,
I lost the love of my life, John, 1 year and 3 weeks ago. You could have been writing for me. I too am tired of feeling like this, tired if trying to pick up the pieces and beginning a new life without John. I dont want a new life without John! Life is now an effort. I have 3 cats, 4 rabbits and a horse, so I’m not likely to do anything silly, but I’m not enjoying life anymore. It’s the love for my animals that are keeping me going.
I’m told it will get better, well it was a bit and now I’ve gone backwards again.
What’s the point?
Take care everyone,
Heather.
I feel the same and it’s been just over 3 months I hate this feeling daily I feel like I’m not living I’m just coping and what kind of life is that to live I’m tired everyday I went from trying to be busy all the time to just not wanting to just do nothing. I miss my boyfriend my best friend that use to hug me and make me laugh. Is this what my life is till my last days? Just sadness loneliness and just living each day to cope it’s not fair 
No Lulu it’s not fair. Everyday is now a struggle but you are coping, we are all coping. Taking one day at a time. I stayed really busy and thought that would get me through and the pain would go. Well, it didn’t and I don’t think it ever will, but I am going to learn to live with it. I have also been going through the phase of not wanting to be bothered but have started to make the effort, slowly… It’s early days for you, take your time.
xxx
Yes,I feel angry with Rob.Angry because he should’ve looked after himself.Angry because he refused Medical check ups .Angry because he should’ve given up smoking when Fibrosis was diagnosed.Angry because he ate all the wrong foods which led to Pancreatis,gallstones and ultimately his death.I know this is a natural phase I am going through but he was so stubborn
Hi Ang - Jack died 15 months ago and yes it do ant feel so raw and yes somethings I got used to them but the void is huge and I feel that things won’t change that much always half of me will be missing
I just read a book - The year of magical lthinking - to me it was very helpful to read it
Take care
Sadie xx
Hello everyone l have just found this thread, such sadness and honesty. I am sorry we all have to be here. Managed to go to the gym yesterday gave me some hope but woke up this morning after poor sleep just feeling low. Will have paint my face on now and go and visit my mother who has dementia. I go through duty as there are many issues between us. I can’t wait to get home and l haven’t left yet. Thinking of you all. X
I’ve made an executive decision that every day I’m going to do something positive, even if it’s something small. I’m tired of being so tired, so low that it’s a major achievement to just get out of bed on the weekends, so low that I cant even muster the energy to shower and clean my teeth. So today I’m going to make some wall hangers for my guitars. At the moment they’re just leaning up against the sofa and my new adopted kitten keeps knocking them over so I’m going to hang them on the wall. Clive had every woodworking tool known to man so I’m going to cut some wooden plaques, learn to router so I can put decorative edges on them, gold leaf them and screw them to the wall.
They’ll probably be dreadful and not at all square, but at least I’ll have achieved something positive for once. I desperately need a plus in my lodger today because I can feel myself spiralling down again.
Wish me luck - here’s hoping that I still have all my fingers by the end of the day!
Good luck Skywise and what a lovely idea. I am sure you will do a grand job l have pushed down my feelings of wanting to cry this morning and am going to the works as there is a sale on going to look for a journal and some nice pens . Let us know how you get on .
Hi…this is how I keep going…I try to do something positive every day. I wake, cry, work, but every day I do one thing that I see as a win…book a course, build something, …keep going x