Aw jane so sorry for you ! Listen to advice - as lady said dont let anyone bully you !! Its funny how everybody thinks they can bully you once youre a widow !!! X
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Thanks. Its been so bad. Ive had so many nasty txts and threats and my step son came round last month and started trying to kick down my back gate as he wanted his Dads electric bike (bought by me and Ā£800 still outstanding on my credit card)
My Husband didnāt make a will so his kids will get a share. Im happy to split the money 50/50 giving them a lot extra to what they will get legally but they just want it all. I have always got on well with them before this. Now they say im not family and should change my surname.
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Wow thsts bad man ! I defo think you need a solicitor ! Xxx
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If you were married youre claased as next of kin though so you get it ! Not them ā¦ be careful xx i cant believe people sometimes 
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@JaneD The bike belongs to you. You bought it, you owe a balance. If your stepson wants it he should pay you for it. If you get threatened inform the police and ask them to give him a caution and put your complaint to the police in writing. This is awful. Is there no one who can support you?
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Oh my goodness! This is the last thing you need! Stand your ground, isnāt it just so awful how anything money related can change people?
Sending love & positive thoughtsā¦
Xxā:two_hearts:
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@JaneD it is clear your step children and brother in law have no understand or sympathy for what you are going through with this difficult agonizing journey of grief. Somehow you have to gather the strength to deal with these awful human beings, and my guess is you will. You stand your ground. You are stronger than you may feel right now. We are all here for you.
Peace and love, Karen
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Go and see a solicitor the law is quite clear about who gers what if someone dies without leaving a will and they cannot force you to do anything As his wife at the time of his death you are entitled to more than you think you are. Please get some advice and let the solucitor deal with his children and brother
Take care x
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Hi all
Thanks for your advice and words. I do have a solicitor. Its very complicated as my Husband was a 1/4 shareholder in his late Dads business which is currently being sold. I know my legal rights but my main concern is doing the fair thing as i believe i will be with my Husband again on my death. The idea was on 2nd death our house would be sold and split between our children ( none together) but this cant happen now as my kids hate his now for what they have put me through. My thoughts are to give his kids an extra 1/2 the value of my house when the business sells. But they feel entitled to 100% of the business. I havnt even started grieving yet as i am being sent hate txts and threats from his kids. I just want to drink myself into oblivion
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Get a restraining order to prevent the texts and emails.
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JaneD this is awful as if you dont have enough to be thinking about.
Ive heard of family breakdowns about the estate etc and Im sure you can refuse to discuss anything further except through your solicitor. I wd do that and block them from your phone and maybe change your locks if any of them have a key to your house.
I hope things get better in the short term. You donāt deserve this.
Sending support and love xx
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I agree with other comments that say block calls, texts emails etc. protect yourself from this. This is not only bad behavior it is unacceptable. Let your legal representative handle things for you once you have set up how you want things done. No contact with you. I am so so sorry. As I mentioned before weāre here for you.
Karen
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I cant imagine all this crap within the pan and grief you are suffering , Iām having some issue cos marts family from Southern Ireland and want different funeral service so Iām having to have 2 ( not his wishes ) but I feel lost and vulnerable and grieving so much , but deep inside I can hear his voice saying ju if this upsets you or goes on any longer tell them to cop them selves out n and you do it your way , you came , come first in his life he chose you to be with ; might not help you, but at the mo itās my only way through his nightmare , you know , knew him best , heās with you , keep it together , stay with him xxxxxx
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Yes do it your own way ! Sod em ! I had arguments about my husbands funeral and where it was with my stupid daughters but i stood my ground and had it where i wanted ! They can all get lost telling me what to do ! They all just take advantage of the fact your vulnerable i think !!!
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Oh the stress ! Its not fair is it people putting you under stress when youre grieving ! Its flipping disgusting !! My own kids doing it to me ! Ive had enough ! I think im just gonna move as far away from them all as i possibly can ! Thats my aim !! I know my husband would be so upset take care xxx
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Deb5. As of this grief journey isnāt devastating enough. We had no children and donāt live anywhere near family. So I essentially am going thru this agonizing journey without any of them. Oh sure I talk with some of them on the phone, but the last several months of my husbands Alzheimerās, I didnāt speak with my family at all. Only a few short texts. I couldnāt take their comments on how I should do or feel about things anymore. Since my husbands death, we do talk, but only one of my sister-in-laws (my brothers wife) has been helpful. So long way of saying, for me being alone in this journey, except of course for the support of this group and my weekly grief group meeting, it is just me, and that might not be so bad. There is so much emotionally and physically to handle that others cannot comprehend.
I wish you peace and love on this difficult journey we are on, Karen
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Cant sleep again. Ive had 7 hrs sleep in the last 3 nights in total.
The meeting was very stressful and heated. My step Daughter said i should have signed a pre nup and to go and find another man to fleece which is what she intends to do in life. My step son called me an old woman (im 58) spoiling their lives and stealing from them.
Im some ways them being so horrible made it easier. There is no chance of reconciliation. Ive accepted that now.
I told them if i get more nasty txts i will not be replying and will forward them to their Uncle to deal with. Hopefully that will stop them.
Its so sad as we were very close. We had so many family get togethers. I was closer than her Mum to my step Daughter and helped her so much over the years.
My question now is when the finances are eventually sorted will i then be thrust into a big black hole of grief and feel worse than i do now?
Sorry its a long message everyone xx
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Moi1
Thanks my Daughter helped me get the locks changed the day the 1st threats of āwe will get whats ours 1 way or anotherā came xx
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Thanks Lotswife xx
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Deb5
Its amazing isnt it how people change when money is imvolved. Im absolutely gobsmacked. I just didnt expect any of this.
Yes i would prefer to have my Husband back and lose the house rather than get a load of money and be alone. His kids think im in a really lucky position. Its laughable really. They just havnt got a clue.
Thanks for your advice xx
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