Hi all. Im having my first counselling assessment this morning, and unless she can wave a magic wand or turn the clock back im not sure how she can help.
I wish like @Jean8 i could wave a magic wand for you all
Xx
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@Sulane @Deb5 @Jean8 and @Skip yes first day back at work trying to look for normality, had to change my next of kin .full on melt down as my brain then lets me know yhey are gone foe ever. I have had professional councelling from 1mth, in my case it helped me just stay on the planet, so i can function for my daughter and lovely granddaughter. If any of you do find that magic wand please sign me up too. Sending tearful hugs to you all.
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Hello
Read your post and feel the same as you i feel i let my partner of 34 years down as the NHS failed him and i could only get to see him when he was dying.
Covid had only just started and the hospital and services shut down. The worst thing i could imagine happened i am two years on but feel worse for some reasonā¦Sending luck and love to us all
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Aw feel for you ! Im so sorry ! Its horrible isnt it ? ā¦ oh life is so cruel ā¦ my husband psssed only 8 wweks ago ! My life has been turned upside down ! He was my rock and i loved him so much ! My hesrt is broken not having him here ! He said he didnāt wanna go and i didnāt want him to go but thr cruel cancer took hin ! I miss him every day as soon as i open my eyes in the morning ! Wow life is so cruel !!
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Hello
Thankyou for replying and i feel your painā¦I donāt know how to manage these feelings of guilt.I read a wonderful post from a guy called Walin this morning.Read it if you can find it and i hope you get some ideas and thoughts of how to cope with this griefā¦
Deb 5
You are still very early on my best advice this early is to get up every morning even if you donāt want to face the day and make your bedā¦sounds patronising what i really mean is one foot in front of the other ā¦Keep posting
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Yeh ā¦ im trying although i donāt make my bed much tbh ! My husband would be horrified ! Lol but trying to keep it together and as you say put one front of the other is a task in itself ! 
xx
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The next of kin thing broke me too @Allen2 .
Good luck back in work, maybe bit of normality might help. Hope you have an ok day
I read that post too @Deborah1, found it really helpful. Its on the ā¦I dont want to play house thread
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I remember reading a post where someone recommended a book which I think was about an idea of the afterlife if there is such a thing but I canāt find the link. If anyone knows what Iām rambling about please let me know. I think the author had a couple of books and several people said it was very interesting.
PS not only have I not made my bed today, I am still in it. Not a good day but none of them are. X
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Baby steps, not easy I know, but donāt knock yourself down for what you canāt do, but think when you manage to make your bed for example be proud and remember your husband would be proud for you as well. Remember lots of people donāt understand what youāre going threw, but believe me everyone reading this does and we are here to help each other threw this hell on earth. Take care, big hug xxx
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I completely understand I lost my darling Frances 250 days ago. It has been total agony for me, completely not functioning now, just keep saying why is. We were married 55;years courting two years before that, she was 17 and I was 22, all said it would not last we prove them wrong. My days are completely dark, and I am scared to move forward.
Keep your chin up they say it gets better!!
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Hi
Going through same thing have you had pals meeting although to be honest waste of time just apologise awaiting outcome of ombudsman complaint since nov2020 also solicitors claim since same time but what im doing is fighting for what she suffered in her last 48 hrs
By the way we had 3250 pages of notes
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Wouldnāt that be wonderful if we could. Big hug xxx
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Same here not heard from my Husband mum or Dad he had 3 sisters and one brother only one of his sisters keep in touch with me
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Wish I could do something to help, but I know nothing can really help, but I hope you know we are here, when you need us because as we all know, this is not easy. Big hug xxx
@Carl2242 No one here will say chin up. I lost my wife of 47 years, together for 50, in October. This is a journey no one wants to take but it is not our choice. It is 1 step at a time, sometimes 2 back for every 1 forward. Each of us is different but we all need support through the worst. Sometimes just the kind words of others here helps to get through the crisis. Look through the threads you will find examples all over. Hope you find some solace here.
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3 months in and getting disgusting txts and threats from his eldest 2 kids re money. After being close for years to them they say im now not family. There is no money at the moment and may not be for a long time as it relys on a business sale. Ive already told the kids i will give them more than what im legally entitled to but they want the lot.
I had a counselling session but they said i was too worried about the finances to begin my grieving and have postponed future sessions.
Im shocked at how people react. Things have been said that can never be taken back.
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I totally relate to this - thank you for being so honest. I am almost 11 months in and have had a lot of similar thoughts. Just starting to get glimpses of wanting to survive. My husband was 56 when he died and we had been married less than 6 months although together nearly 13 years. I also get fed up of being told to get a dog! Keep sharing with other widows as the rest of the world wont ever get it.
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Wonderful family hey ? I think theyāre the worst !!! Funny how it all comes down to money isnt it ? When all you really want is your husband back money cant buy that can it ?
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