Debs5: I think we all think why me? When I’m strong (and only occasionally) I think how lucky I was to have had those years and if this pain is the price I have to pay, well I’ll take it, is the difference was not in pain but not knowing him. Someone said to me the other day about a friend of ours who is in a loveless marriage and will never have known what we had. It’s just a case of one foot in front of the other and taking one day at a time, but it’s hard when you think you are maybe (just maybe) heading to a better place, then you hit a brick wall. I personally always feel disappointed with myself going backwards but deep down I know I have no control. Big hug xxx
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Allan2: Remember here we are all in the same boat and I only found this a couple of weeks ago when I was in a very dark place & I found it helped knowing others cared (when you read some more than family members, though alas I have no family what so ever, so have got comfort from being able to talk on here when I needed. The secret is to help each other. Take care xxx
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Thanks ! I just wanted to share this poem with everybody my brother sent me a few weeks ago from a friend he knows who lost her partner :
My mind still talks to you
My heart still looks for you
But my soul knows you’re at peace
I miss you every single day
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KarenF:
Sulane
I can’t find that conversation ‘Helping each other,’ I do find this site difficult to navigate at times.
Don’t know if you can add a link to conversations or not but bill keep looking for it.
Thanks. x
Sorry not sure how to send a link, but I put helping each other in search bar at top and it came up (it was about 5 or 6 down when I tried to find it this way) xxx
I know life can be really tough for some of us cant it 
its not fair ! Xxx
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Yes, I’ve heard that before it’s lovely.
I found comfort in the words of Heavens now my home.
If you put that in search engine along with comforting funeral song it will bring them up (by Libby Allan) I had the the one that shows a religious building on the first picture and the videos for 3m 49s I had this at Marks funeral I found the words so meaningfull and the images as well (there is also one with a female singer if it’s a female you are grieving) I sincerely hope it will give someone some comfort, but be warned I’m not sure you can listen to it without tears. xxx
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Yep.just listened to it … it is sad but doesnt really address us mere mortals who have to carry on surviving after they gone though ? its that pain in your heart for so many reasons that i csnt stand that constant yearning for the man you.loved .
Does it ever go ? That sadness .
Debs5:
I don’t think the pain ever goes away but I hope we can eventually find a way to live with it rather than just managing to survive threw this hell. One day at a time, so hard xxx
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KarenF:
Big hug & take care xxx
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Yeh i hope so too ! Especially in this crazy world we live in ! Its flipping mad ! Xx
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As you say one day at a time … that’s whst everyone says ! But its a cold, harsh world without that special man in your life isnt it
Take care all you guys !! Youre more precious than you think Xxx
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Just got back to the quiet lonely house said hello but no reply. Log on and read all the updated messages. They were a great comfort to me so thanks to everyone. Was busy today so did not have time to think. Now the evening approaches and the lonely time starts.
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We are here when you need us xxx
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Im the same. Back to working from home he used to help me with any tech problems and now it’s really hard to get by. No noise. No tea breaks with him. Just quietness day in day out. The evenings are terrible. Im so lonely. I keep crying out loud to give me a sign but nothing happens.
Writing this helps as saying it out loud would be weird. X
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I know what you mean I talk to Frances photos all the time and keep the radio on all the time to give a noise. Evenings are bad. I was lucky to night a neighbor popped in for a chat. It was a big change rather than silence. Writing this is a way to help.
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Moi1: It does help writing here and I know what you mean with tea breaks ect. All we can do is take one day at a time. Big hug xxx
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@Moi1 , me too in regards to the TV, we used to watch any number of shows, but I won’t do that now, too painful and despite there being numerous channels and choices, I do not find any great solace in the box in the corner! Way too many triggers there at times, daft I know but right now that 's where I am. Some topical humour and current affairs or historical documentaries are about it for now! I tried watching two movies last night and shut both off almost immediately as they were all about happy couples and weddings etc.
No meltdowns but an ever increasing internal emotional pressure, probably why my irregular sleeping pattern has returned, up again just after 3 this morning!
Got to try and keep busy now, stay safe.
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Yeh its hard watching lovey dovey stuff isn’t it ! I wish i could get lovey dovey with my darling husband but hes gone ! I love and miss him so much xx
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It’s heart breaking and now all this valentine stuff. It’s 3am and I cant sleep. Life is hell.
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