@Deb5 thank you - well I don’t understand what’s going on with these children of ours . I’m sorry you’ve not seen your son for ages . After seeing mine during the week, I can’t get hold of him again? They make themselves unavailable don’t they which is not right considering what we are up against. I realise they grieve too , but they do it in a very strange way xxx
Theyre not grieving - theyre being selfish. Why cant you get in touch with him ? If hes not answering his phone he has blocked you this is what they do ! This is the sort of awful world we live in now when people cant even be bothered to even speak to a widow …
Such a sad state of affairs isnt it ? what a world !!! Xx
What a lovely name. My 9th grandchild was born 7 weeks after Rob passed away they called him Jaxon Robert. My husband was Robert, and my sons middle name is Robert, so carrying on the name. Its sad when your kids dont answer your calls. My son and daughters all suffered with grief when their dad passed away and found it hard to talk to me as they were going through their own emotions. My daughter is doing a sky dive in a couple of weeks and has raised over 1k for the hospice Rob spent his last few hours in. He was in the paratroopers when younger, so she is doing it in his memory.
@Deb5 yes I’m blocked again. He spoke to me after my dad phoned him - he’s now saying that as I’m due to move soon he’s not got time to help me . I despair. My own son won’t help his mother who is struggling with grief really badly and can’t think straight half the time . I don’t know when I’ll next see Isaac - apparently they’ve got things to do with a newborn. Yes I had one myself!
My DIL was very spiteful and went as far as to tell me unless I stop being so demanding then I won’t have a relationship with her or my grandson- how has the world come to this ? xxx
I have absolutely no idea ? But i do know that some people are idiots and i have learnt that in the last 15 months at least… we just have to look after ourselves it seems and at least we got this lovely site where we can speak to other widows who understand x
Children can be so cruel. Give it time and he will come round. It may be the pressure of a new baby and the loss of his dad that are causing his behaviour to be as it is. We all know grief can affect us all differently.
@Deb5 well I’m getting fed up with being messed about. I asked for help as I’m moving my furniture from my flat into storage until the house is ready - that’s the plan !
He won’t spare me a few hours to get my valuable items and Baz’ things out . He knows I’m in a desperate situation. I would never have believed this of my son - he used to be wonderful xxx
@Punto well I’m so fed up with life in general I will give him time . I fear the child will be held over me like the sword of Damocles and I’m not happy about this . Acting like a spoiled brat when he’s 31 on Monday .
I don’t care if he’s grieving, in fact I don’t believe he is truly grieving. If he was he would be capable of showing compassion because that’s what’s necessary when you’ve lost the most important person in your life . He can’t blame being overwhelmed by taking it out on me . I’m doing my best under a terrible situation and he could alleviate this by allowing me access to my grandson but he chooses not to . That is simply cruel and spiteful xx
Aw … that’s not nice is it ;( can you send a text? I not seen my son for 6 bloody months ! Hes a little sod xx
@Deb5 he ignores my messages so I don’t bother . I have tried to phone him but I’m blocked. After my happiness on Weds that things were getting back to normal, I now feel back to square one . My son is a very cruel young man and I’m ashamed to say he’s mine
Ahh My daughter adored her dad too she dreamt of him cuddling her the other night… she feels bad as she never really gave him a cuddle… she’s setting up something on her website to raise money for Crohn’s disease her dad had that…
I guess it’s there way of coping with grief good luck for your daughter that’s amazing
@Ladysuisei6
Congratulations on a new life in your family
My daughter has been trying for two years no luck yet… I already have a grandson he is 12 but she can’t seem to fall pregnant again she’s 30 this year…
My daughters the same , was never really one for hugging people whereas my wife loved hugs , it used to upset her that our daughter was like that . Crazy thing is now my daughter hugs me all the time , guess she’s afraid of losing me as well now this cruel world has made her go through this at just 18
Just dropped daughters familys easter eggs off, and because i’m going to my other daughters little ones birthday tomorrow along with my sons family, she let rip. All because my son didn’t come to her little ones 1st birthday. Bloody families I wish you could have a happy pill for them.
@Punto @Dino13
Just do what makes you happy. Ignore them and dont get involved or take sides. My Grandmother used to play my mum and her siblings off against each other. Some never spoke again, even after 50yrs. No on in the family was interested when she passsed, she was cruel and spiteful. So just live your own life. Good luck.
@Dino13
Very cruel world my daughter is 29 and does allow me to hug her more now…she only said the other day there’s not much of our family left now… all her grandparents have passed she was 13 when my mum died of cancer she took that quite bad as they had a special bond…she never knew my dad he died at 60… and 3 months after her dad died her last remaining grandad died… he was 101 though a ripe old age and bright as a button…I’m just hoping I go quick and don’t suffer so much loss has changed me…
@Dino13
OMG ! That’s awful. I’ve lost 4 since 2012. My daughter 31, then my mum, then dad and now my husband. One every four years . I’m dreading 2028 cos I’d better get plenty done before then.
Yes, it has changed me too. Made me realise how much time I’ve wasted on “family” who don’t care. And being bothered about stuff that doesn’t matter. Now it’s my time to do what l want . Take care, here if you need to chat.
@Ilovehorses thank you ! I’ve only seen him once but it’s early days . I think new life gives us reason for optimism and joy . I don’t have any other joy in my life these days .
I’m so sorry your daughter would love another child but it isn’t happening. That’s difficult isn’t it . Hopefully one day she will finally have her baby in her arms ……
Take care xxx
@Punto well considering they’ve got an adorable new baby I really cannot see why my son seems so dissatisfied. He’s rude , spoiled and selfish. He isn’t grieving. He’s done with all that . Sadly I’ll be grieving for the rest of my life - something which he has overlooked xxx
@Cindy2
How absolutely awful for you too losing your daughter, mum, dad and now husdband I’m not surprised your feeling this way I can totally resonate I’m dreading 60 everyone I love died in there 60s I bet your dreading the fourth year… your completely right about putting lots of energy and time into family… I’ve done exactly the same now I’m feeling it’s my time with what life I have left… I’m 58 and my bloody joints have started to ache already… I do walk an awful lot as I enjoy walking amongst nature…I’ve joined a group on fb solo travellers so brave some of these people… I’ve only been brave enough to go in the uk… Mabe one day still early days from loss…