Wow ladies that’s amazing all these lovely signs from your loved ones . I honestly believe there has to be something in it and more to the point it does give comfort which we all need . Xxxxx big hugs to all xxxx i woke up a little while ago and could see Daniel just staring at me then he was gone . Don’t think I was dreaming , Maybe he was just checking up on me . Xxx
Bloody hell my heart is broke just can’t stop crying , I’m so lost and never felt sadness like this . The pain is unbearable, what’s it all about and more to the point how do you go on when you feel nothing matters anymore and the happiness is gone out of your life . Xx
Teddy - crying is good, crying is grief, it is a clearing of hours of sad thoughts and frustrations that build up, Not crying does not mean we are better. Some people naturally cry more than others. It just is as it is. I wish I could have a good cry early in the morning and a good cry when I get into bed but I cannot be in control like that .I hope that u are able to get those flowering plants chosen when you can. ZOE lovely coincidences and dreams Teddy. MY boys are not ready for me yet .xxxxx
As days go by you will learn to cope a bit more . Our lives have been changed forever . No words make it ok but we understand this pain sending big hugs . Our children would hate us to be so sad xx
Thank you ladies , yes just very hard to try and get through each day and I totally agree our children wouldn’t want this for us xxxx
Yes well, probably should not have watched Spring statement and heard the bleak forecast for the next year .I am aware that when I focus on a subject that makes me concentrate hard that these days it is a prelude to a bad rest of the day . Today I feel guilty . Guilty that I am a miserable devastated wreck and that I have had a life and that my boys had it taken away too soon. I feel today that life is cruel and random and there is no point trying to think about heaven and the afterlife or some alternative place of peace. I just feel they lived and died and they were cremated and they are gone and that is it I want to be saved somehow when I get like this. I think they might call it hopelessness, despair - giving up on hope, seeing nothing but emptiness a and harsh realities I do not wish to face . I probably feel depressed or low in mood but it feels like I am using up energy I do not have trying g
To think thoughts I do not really believe. I think I might be on the verge of anger and a lot of it. M maybe it is , I hope it is because that is probably what I feel in the pit of my stomach. Not just for me and the loss of .mine but for all the
losses everywhere. The ,wars the poverty here and elsewhere, the death of 17 year old soldiers and for what? Today I really really need some positive or otherwise input. I’m sure today is the national day of reflection but have heard nothing about it? Sorry folks -skip over this as it is a bit of a downer. Take care allx
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Oh Jenna I really feel for you.Because today I have had one of those why me moments.You are right it is national day of reflection.In our town we have a memorial for the ones that died during the pandemic.Yhey were giving a long with all all the civic dignitaries. I Wanted scream from the roof tops what about all the others that have died there is more yhan one disease let’s honour everyone.I have been Really agitated and weepy.But tommorows another day.
Should read a minutes dilence
Oh ladys this life has done us a big injustice. Your allowed to be angry thats part of grief . Angry .sad . Your allowed to be how you feel . This is massive we have lost our children .sending you big hugs … they would not want us sad but so hard xx
Hi ladies , so sorry your having such an awful day Jenna , my prayers and thoughts are with you !! I suppose the truth is none off us know or understand how to deal with this awful situation we have been put in . I honestly still can’t get my head around what has happened to my amazing beautiful son . I’d imagine we all wake up in the morning and think what the hell and how we are going to get through each day but somehow we do . I don’t k or how we do to be honest and more to the point even if we want to because the life we had is gone and none off us will ever be the same people again our families dynamic has completely changed forever . Big hugs to all xxxxx
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Well my awful day has continued through the night no sleep as yet. I think I could be developing chest infection .I had one when jonny died and another one 7 weeks ago. I wandered also this persistent fear in my gut like something awful is going to happen. I can only think that it has something to do with motherS day which is coming up.Im not sure - thanks for the posts they do really help me - they are so authentic and true and I find them soothing. Love to u all. JX
I am feeling much the same. Spent yesterday in bed trying to hide from these awful feelings of loss and loneliness. My physical health is not good either. I can’t see anything to have pleasure in. I’ve got antidepressants but they don’t help much (who knows maybe it’s possible they are and otherwise it would be worse!). I don’t know what to do with myself to just get a break from this pain. The only thing I’m clinging on to is the hope that this intense pain will ease sometime and the only thing to do right now is keep on keeping on. You aren’t alone, though it feels like it right now. I’m thinking of you, and everyone else going through heartbreak and loss. X
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Omg your loss is so great , how would you think any different with what has happened! I honestly get you feeling the way you do . My other children feel that way . My youngest son constantly checks on me through out the night his nerves are at him because he found his brother !! He is only 19! My daughters think they are going to loose one of their children as the same thing has happened to myself and my mum . Xxx big hugs to all the ladies hope you did manage to get some sleep Jenna xxxxccc
Jenna it’s definitely because Mothers day is looming.Why everyone is feeling pain and despair. My family make such a fuss on Mothers day.Everything is still going ahead out for food.But my son and grandchildren said we should do it in memory of my daughter.After all they lost their Mum and sister too.Itsthe first one without her.And I feel we have no right to celebrate.But we have to get through each day whichever way we can.Big hugs ladies.
This is the hard thing to deal with the fact that life does go on and people continue with there day to day tasks band we basically just want to lie down . It really hasn’t stopped for me . Christmas my sons birthday and now bloody mothered day it’s just relentless!!!
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Mothers day
Morning ladies xxxxx
Good Morning. Hope the sun shines today in our hearts and mind,.
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Let’s hope so xxxx
Hello all- feeling better - I did have a chest infection and a very high temperature which kind of made sense of the bad dreams I was having. Feeling better after a couple of days of antibiotics. Hope u are all ok feeling a bit anxious about MD tomorrow L ove to allx