,hiya nel my daughter checked got £8000 pounds and my monthly payment lv annie x I also get £193 per month state pension x x
How come you don’t get full state pension.
Hi Nel
I looked into it. They changed the rules and your husband had to be retirement age in April 2016 mark retired May 2016 so just missed out. If I was entitled I wouldn’t get it til I got my state pension. Still got 6 years to wait for that thanks to them changing the rules on retirement age.
It’s like a kick in the guts xx
no state pension isnt means tested its ifhe retired before april 16
the only thing thats means tested is pension credit then you or your husband have to have a private pension or more than 10,000 in savings
pat
It is a kick in the guts. My husband was 14 years older than me. I took my private NHS pension and retired early to look after him. I am 59. He then passed away 9 months later I felt robbed. I then got part of his private pension. Fortunately I don’t pay mortgage anymore. But the government make sure that there is just enough to cover the bills no extra frills for us to have something nice to look forward to. As if it is no t bad enough that we struggle with grief we have to struggle with money also x
I don’t no nel I worked 25years social services lv annie x
Surely you must have a pension from that or are as tight as cramp also
Hiya nel only paid pension for 10years got money back of that lv annie x x
Hi Nel
that is true what you have said when your old and on your own from no fault of your own and still grieving for your loss no one cares if you have enough to live on we dont only struggle with grief but have to struggle to still pay bills and feed yourself
they say that the state pension is supoosed to be slightly higher than the cost of living what ever the cost of living is everything goes up but pensions never cover the rises
your not supposed to have any luxouries or treat yourself now and then just live hand to mouth
you are really classed as a second hand citizen living on state pension
my husband was ill for years and in the last 2 years started to go down down hill we couldnt get any help with nothing just had to plod along and manage he was offered a nurse to come in twice a week twice but each time the doctor changed his mind i asked how could he tell how bad my husband was without seeing him by the time we did get a bit of extra cash with attendance allowance he died a month later then a week ago i had a doctor from the hospital phone to say they still have an appoint for him to see my husband about his breathing told him he had passed away in november he didnt even know
what do you do
pat
Same here. My husband was 10 years older than me and I gave up work 3 years ago to look after him when he had complications after his operation for bowel cancer. I’m sure you are like me in not wanting to go back to work so we’ll just have to get by. Feels like we are just left to get on with it. Xx
Hi Rose. Hope your Sunday is going ok. I’ve been for a walk and now at home. Sometimes I think it’s worse going home to that empty house, would I be better not going out?. You sound like a lovely person. Message me any time if you need to someone who understands - who puts on the brave face even though we are crying inside. Lots of love and good wishes to you xx
1 Like
Thank you lookingforhope
It helps to talk to people who know what it’s like I’m not good at talking about how I’m feeling but feel I can on this forum wish we did not have to be on here though like us all
I have not been out yet but my son asked me to go over for dinner so I will go have to drive then as you say it is horrible coming home guess I have to work through it I am lucky to have a family I know some are dealing with there loss alone
You can message me also sad we have this in common take care xxx
You too xx Hope your visit goes well xx
I am so disgusted because being British born and having worked and paid tax and ni all my life being self employed for most of it I am entitled to nothing, I am not entitled to Petes pension because we weren’t married, because I was self employed in Southern Ireland and moved from there to Northern Ireland to be closer to Petes elderly parents I’ve been told the won’t import my ní contributions.
I also worked in London for 25 years employing 7 people paying mine and their ni but am not entitled any job seekers allowance, they will only pay my ni credits.
I could claim universal credit if my savings were less than 16 thousand (which they soon will be as that’s what I’m living on) since Pete died last November but I will have to be available for work.
Can’t claim Bereavement benifit because we weren’t married , so I have absolutely no income and am just watching my life savings dwindling away.
It is sickening that I have always worked and paid into the system and the first time in my life at 61 that I’ve ever applied for some help, I’ve been turned down.
It’s such a worry and adds to my sadness and the shock of losing my wonderful soulmate very suddenly and I don’t even know if I’ll be able to keep the roof over my head.
Life can be so cruel.
Muldool
Hi everyone reading here about pensions and having to cope money wise it’s so hard isn’t it Graham and I were together 32years not married he had his own business which I also worked at from home paperwork on pc as Graham was not technology gifted 
I worked for love not money 
when Graham was diagnosed with terminal cancer 2019 he had to give the business up I was on pip as I’ve had breast cancer mastectomy the works in 2016 then was diagnosed with Fybromyalgia so as Graham was 11 years older than me he was getting state pension we also got Attendance Allowance Carers Allowance and pension credit when he was diagnosed we own our home no mortgage luckily so when Graham died every benefit stopped as I’m only 61 i don’t get state pension for years yet not married so can’t claim any benefits for married couples but we were together 32years! So I have my pip allowance and now get universal credit but they keep ringing me every month a work coach calls i have to agree to this or money gets stopped they will only consider you grieving for 3 months for any death I was told then work coach started calling every month I have to keep getting a sick note from my gp it’s so hard I’ve told them I don’t want to get out of bed some days let alone think about going on to looking for work but I have to sell our house as we have business debts still to pay to the bank £11,000 I have no other money so as Graham gifted me the house in his will as he was here 12 months before we met so house is classed as his estate so I have to pay from selling the house its not that I mind selling the house it’s a 2 bed terrace and it’s getting harder for me with my fibro and I know my memories will move with me but as the bank held off whilst Graham was poorly now I have to pay for it then hopefully have enough to buy a small flat but I just haven’t got the motivation to get the house up for sale and all that entails and the moving all this is very bad on top of loosing Graham 8 months ago the benefits money I get now is around £650 month and my gas and elec this quarter come to £250 and c tax and all other bills it’s just crazy My mom’s 89 widow lives in a council house my brother just been made redundant after 16 years so not very cheerful all round oh and my work coach told me that when I do sell my home the universal credit will stop as I’ll have money from house!!! Sorry if this is too long and sounds self pitying I really don’t want it to come across like that at all I just wanted to explain the situation I’m in and I totally understand everyone’s situation is different and difficult but I suppose I just wanted a moan sorry
Suzanne x
1 Like
Hi Muldool and Suzanne
i can really understand you frustration the system does let everyone down any excuse to not pay money
when my husband died because he retired before april 16 i got antop up of £75 a month from his pension but took them 3 months to sort out my pension credit and i only got then because i went to the CAB for help they dont really care how you struggle and that you are grieving and that all the fighting makes you feel 10 times worse im sure they expect you to just pick yourself up and brush yourself down as if nothing has happened i think the system should have special bereavemen people to help you
you both have the right to moan as so many others have
pat
2 Likes
Thank you Pat x
Hi Suzanne, it sounds like you are in the same boat as me, its so frustrating!
I’m the same age too and have a long time to wait for my pension.
I think it’s so awful that you are being hound by the work coach, I had the same until they decided they were only going to pay my ni.
There is absolutely no way I would be ably to to hold down a job as you say some days it takes all you strength just to get out of bed, 3 months is not long enough. When I spoke to cab they advised me to carry on living on my saving until I get down to 16,000 and then apply for universal credit. I really wound not be able to handle these work coaches calling and asking what I have done to get a job, I have worked non stop since I was 15 and yet I see so many people who have been on benefits most of their lives and are better of than me.
I really hated having to ask for help and to be refused has really knocked my confidence, these people have no idea how difficult it is to function when you are grieving for your loved one. I am totally disgusted and disillusioned with the whole situation.
I’m sorry if I sound self pitying too but I am really hacked off.
Hope things improve for you.
Muldool
2 Likes
Hi Suzanne
We got attendance allowance and carers allowance but as you say it all stops together with marks pension. I will see my savings go down as like you have to wait a few years for my pension. 3 months is definitely not long enough to grieve and to hassle you to look for work. There is no way I could look for a job at the moment. Confidence is so low.
Don’t worry about moaning think we are all entitled to have one. Xx
2 Likes
@Muldool
Hi yes it’s so frustrating isn’t I worked since I was 16 then after my mastectomy the chemo the radiotherapy etc it basically done me in then my fibro getting worse I just did the computer work for Graham at home then Graham was diagnosed in 2019 then he died 8 months ago so all in all its been a horrid 5 years then all this money situation on top and because of probate as Graham having a will I’ve also got to pay the solicitor from the money from selling the house too it never ends this is why my heads never clear and im always anxious so I just get through day to day but I am so glad I found this site as its a comfort other people feeling the same take care Muldool too
Suzanne x
1 Like