@Katyh yes I have a lovely sister and brother who I see regularly. Iām three years in but grief does catch me unaware. I feel I need to lean into it as it help you heal. To ignore it is foolish. After a good cry I feel better I work at a charity on Mondays which helps me keep in touch with reality as being at home all the time makes me feel I live in a bubble. We need to touch reality to feel real Sending hugs thank you for your response
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It sounds like you have your ducks in order. Itās good to hear you have good people around you for support. Are you able to increase days at the charity shops or start another? as you said it helps you keep touch with reality.
Itās also good to talk on here, if you ever feel lonely. Everyone here truly understands. Have a nosey around and contribute to other threads 
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Wow @Nel youre echoing everything i am feeling atm ā¦ im 18 months into this ! Im so angry at this crap world atm ā¦ im so angry it took my darling husband and left me here without him ā¦ i miss him so much ! I would just love one of his hugs - that would be so nice ! Xx
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It was great, so glad I went. Everyone was lovely to me, lots of hugs and support. I even danced, and managed not to cry. Iām still a bit deaf!
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Well done ! Xx
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@Katyh im three years in kat and some days like today the anxiety just grabs me and wonāt let go. What do you do when youāre feeling anxious ?
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Deep breaths. I think its 2 breath in and breath out 4 or just pamper yourself ! I get a nice hot bath at night that helps or listen to music xx
Hi @Nel
Sorry your feeling so anxious. Maybe try a little walk, itāll do you a world of good. Walking helps the body, mind and soul. Itāll also help the anxiety pass. Anxiety is usually the worry of the future. The anxiety is usually worse than the doing if that makes sense. Sometimes I feel anxious about going out which is all new to me as before I was really confident. However I still go and the anxiety soon passes, it is also less likely that I feel anxious as bad or as often. I think the more you push yourself the more you learn to cope and build skills to manage. By moving forward itāll help you not be completely consumed by grief.
Hope your day gets better xx
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The title sums it all up for me.
Yes weāve nobody to do nothing with, just acres of time stretching ahead to try and fill alone. I try and not think about it as it scares me. Can only do one day at a time. So sad xx
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Yes, I feel the same. Nothingness. Itās a miserable feeling. We used to get up and I would say āwhat shall we to today?ā He would always say, that he didnāt mind, that he was just happy to spend the day with me. Oh, I am crying now. I try not to look into the future. Even though there are jobs that need sorting there isnāt much incentive to do them on bad days. On the ābetterā days I get a little bit of satisfaction from completing something to an acceptable standard. Xx
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I totally get that, my Andrew was happy if I was happy he was so easy going and laid back.
Yes everything seems to be just too much effort. Iāve been collecting parcels after buying random thingās. My front room if filled with boxes 
I canāt even remember whatās in them. I remember buying a mattress topper, so Iām going hunt that out and see what Iāve got. It ridiculous! X
Itās such a nice day today, another day that Iāll waste no doubt! Iāve got a telephone appointment with a gp today as Iāve got a bad back, I hate talking to doctors and canāt stand going to appointments I donāt no why but itās always given me anxiety. Itās even more so now because of the neglect they caused my Andrew bloody pigs they are!
Iāll feel better after Iāve done some jobs and my sister is calling round later. Xx
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That sounds like us, asking each other what we wanted or needed to do each morning. Yes thatās brought tears and memories of happy, easy times being with him.
Xxx
Yes me too. Weād decide what needed doing if anything and then he would go out on his bike in the countryside and I would be happily pottering around the house and garden. On sunny days like these weād sit in the garden and enjoy the weather. We were so happy just being together.
It all seems like a long time ago. We made the most of our time together and say ā well you never know whatās round the cornerā but I never expected this!!
And now I canāt even get the parasol up because itās too stiff for me and he always did it 
Wishing you all a better day than yesterday xxš„°
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Fingers crossed for the best day we can haveā:crossed_fingers:t2:
Big hug 
xx
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Hey @RoseGarden
Donāt think we have spoken for a while, was just wondering how youāve been getting on
How strange Katyh, I was just thinking about Rose too. Hope you are feeling a bit better xx
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