Look at U3a there are lots of groups in every area and hopefully you will find something that interests you. The people are retired or semi retired and some of them are widows/widowers.
Alice I’m so sorry. I lost my husband suddenly with no warning in June. Like you every day is a challenge. I had experienced grief before from the loss of parents and two friends but the mental and physical effects of this loss is overwhelming. I have found reading other people’s experiences helpful and comforting and made me feel less alone.
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Hello Wren Yes I have been like this for a long time now. The anxiety is awful for me. The mornings are worse. It completely drains me and yes feel very unwell. I am on medication and find rest and breathing exercises do sometimes help to ease the symptoms. I am also very depressed too. Its a vicious circle I find and the loneliness is unbearable. Dealing with these feelings on my own is frightening I no longer have that person around to help me through.
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I lost my husband couple months ago and I feel the same all the things he did I have to do and it’s so hard I hate the emptiness in the house and end up in bed early cry every day this is so hard
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Hello Daf. I understand how you feel and yes it is so dam hard. I feel I have no back up now in doing things that we would share in decision making. I feel unsure all the time that I am doing the right thing. That person I had to confide in is no longer here. The silence and emptiness in the house is just horrid and the reality of it brings home how final it is in losing them. I am at a loss of what to do now with the rest of my life. Its so so raw and painful. People around me just seem to not understand the enormity of what I am going through.
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I understand your thoughts.
We had so many dreams and plans and they’ve been taken away so cruely. Here one minute, gone the next.
Everyone it seems want to give me advice but at the end of the day they go home to their partners.
As my husband died at 66 i feel ive possibly got years ahead of me and it concerns me I’ll forget him. People say they feel there presence or guidance but i can’t. Did i not love him enough or trying to hard. I want to feel the love of his hugs or am i just wanting someone anyone to hold me. It’s difficult everyday to get up. I don’t feel there is in any purpose in life now. I don’t have friends who live by or family near by. No brothers, sisters or cousins. I was an only child and so were my parents.
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I’m 67 and my husband was 67. After several difficult years caring for his mother with dementia and his brother who needed support our life was about to get better. We were going to get the house decorated and work through a list of other jobs which were well overdue. We hadn’t had a holiday for years. We loved Wales and were planning to go back to a particular place we loved. I’m also an only child with only one cousin i see now and then. I had hardly any sleep last night so have felt awful all
day. On Friday I’m starting bereavement counselling at a local private centre. I really need somebody who is not a friend or family to talk to. I’m hoping this may help. I don’t think we’ll ever forget them. I don’t feel any presence or guidance just an emptiness and aloneness.
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Just saying hello to everyone and hope you are OK. Its 12 weeks for me today. Doesn’t seem possible. I’m not looking forward to the winter months. Two of my friend’s who have been very supportive are going abroad for weeks and i am really going to miss them.
Reading everyone else’s descriptions of how they feel and what’s going on in their lives makes me feel more normal, so thank you.
I’m nearly 9 weeks in to this miserable journey. I hate waking up in the morning when the memory of what happened hits me again. I can’t see a way forward on my own. It’s literally unimaginable.
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Morning Wren I know that feeling my neighbour (friend) went away last week, and I really missed her. I am also dreading the winter months. I lost Gra 14 weeks as yesterday really hard to think its over 3 months since I last saw him . Hugs Jo xxxx
Morning Sam some how some way we have to make a you way of live and like you that seems impossible to imagine. I just want my old life back. I would give up everything live in a tent for that. Hugs jo xxx
Me too Jo. I just want to turn the clock back. I’m so lonely without him. How will this ever change.
I really have no answers I wish I did, all I know is we have to take one day at a time and keep moving forward. What choice do we have. I have read so many posts on here and Facebook and some how some way people have moved forward, carrying there love deep within there hearts, I hope we all find peace because at this moment it feels more like torture. Hugs Jo xxx
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Hi jevncute. I know you are right when you say we have to try and keep moving forward. I just ask myself why. I won’t do anything silly, I’m not brave enough, but I can’t see any point to my life.
I have an old school friend who keeps telling me what I should and should not be doing - she’s always full of advice, and then moans to me that her days are not good. She is divorced but has a son who goes to her for his evening meal nearly every day. It’s my birthday on Wednesday, the first one since Bill died. I guess I’ll spend it on my own 
My stepdaughter and her husband will he working and my stepson and his family are away in Portugal for two weeks, not that I see much of him anyway. I just cannot look to the future, without my Bill what is the point.
Sorry, I’m being so negative.
Sending love and hugs to you all
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Hi Harriet. I’m sorry you feel like this too. I’m sorry that any of us ever have to feel like this. The grief of losing a partner seems to be a well kept secret. I had no idea that it would be this awful. Perhaps it’s just as well that I didn’t!
I’m going to try and get through the rest of the day, and I guess that will be an achievement. Hope you manage too. It has to be hour by hour or even minute by minute.
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Morning everyone. 10 weeks yesterday since I saw Paul, the love of my life. I’m also dreading the winter and really carrying on for the sake of my children and grandchildren. Despite this I’m determined to try my best for them all as they are doing all they can to help me through. Some days are more challenging than others but hopefully this gloomy outlook on life will slowly be more bearable as time goes by. Thinking of you all and sending hugs.X
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Morning Harriet and all, likethe rest I dont have the answers or a magic wand I truly do, I would take everyones pain away I truly would.
I get up each day and try my best to get through that day. I cry I break down at the silliest of things.but I also try and smile. Omg is that hard.
I feel your pain and if its only half what I am feeling then my heart goes out to you all.
I pray and hope one day we will all find peace and some sort of new normal.
Hugs Jo xxx
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Take time , eat what you want , when you want. My tea was a chocolate bar last night but that was all i needed
Good morning everyone. I find it difficult to eat anything until mid afternoon when my appetite seems to wake up. I have found Fortisip nutrition drinks a life saver. My doctor prescribed some for me but i have also bought them from Amazon. I have one at 8am then another at 11am. They are small and easy to get down when you cannot eat. I was losing a lot of weight but that has slowed down now.
Hugs to everyone
I find the mornings the hardest. I’m still in bed wondering what the point of getting up is. I have no appetite and no interest in anything. I feel utterly desolate and alone. It will be 9 weeks on Thursday since my husband died so I suppose early days, but I honestly can’t see an end to this.
My weight has gone down quite a bit but that hasn’t been a bad thing. I find cooking for one too depressing to even think about at the moment.
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