I am so glad you have started Jigsaws. I had never done them before but a friend persuaded me to give them a try. I hate being on my own and find lonliness is unbearable so I am doing my jigsaws most of my time - when I cannot sleep I will get up early and do them.
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Have you tried word searches or mindfulness colouring that can take your mind off things
Hi @Pam14
Yes i chat to Nick all the timeā¦ especially if something goes wrong. I sayā¦ where are you when i need you!
Heavy heart every day 
cant sleep.
Ill have to adapt in the future.
Ive even see summer festivalsā¦ that me and nick would have gone to.
Im not going without him.
Nothing is going to be the same again 
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Nick would want you to enjoy the festivals Iām sure. Happy memories . Sending hugs x
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No life will never be the same again but I guess we have to try find are way round it all some how
We have to get though it the best way we can x
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Hi i resonate with what you say about being no one in a nothing world. I say āIām Mrs Nobodyā now. I feel like I have lost my standing in the world now. I honestly hope things improve for me but it is two years and I still feel the same as the day my husband died.x
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@Loobyloo2 hi, It will be 3 years in september . How i have got this far without my husband .I really dont know ! I had totaly lost the me i was when my husband died . And i did actually like that me . I am finding now small pieces of that person are coming back .but i know i will never be the same , i will never be loved the way i was , never be somebody to someone . Never be completely happy again ā¦ the close bond that we had , has been broken like my heart . all i think we can hope for is to find some sort of peace .while we continue this life without them physically here with us . I know i carry my husband in my heart with me and always will . And i do and have to believe i will be reunited with him one day . Sending hugs ( i think we could all do with a hug ) xtake carex
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I feel the same. My daughter and her family live a good bit away from me and can only visit once in a while. I keep the garden and the house nice just for them coming. It keeps me busy but no joy or satisfaction in it for me. I do have thoughts like āwhy bother, whats the pointā Ijust remind myself its for them. There is a dullness, an emptiness that is always there.
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At some point busy has to stop Pam. Cant keep being busy. We need to rest. And thatās when it hits us.
We have no resting state because as soon as we stop the thoughts rush in.
Thoughts are with you x
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I too lost my soulmate husband coming up to three years now .I still miss him so much not having him at home where we did everything together that is at weekends as he was still working full time even though well past retirement age as he loved his job and was a workaholic . I thought it would get better but still finding it difficult not having him to talk to and not having his support for advice . It does help reading that I am not alone in my thoughts Thank you
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Hi yes not being someoneās priority now is a hard thing to process. I think to myself sometimes that if I go out just to the shop no one would be worrying where I am if Iām out too long. Nobody checking to see if youāre alright. Nobody has your back. I donāt like it. Will never get used to not being someoneās significant other. Breaks my heart. Take care.x
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Hi what you say is so true I feel the same it so hurts
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Hi Loobyloo2,
Yr words were perfect and exactly how I feel.
I have grown up children but you know that yr partner always worried about yr welfare etc etc and that for all of us, was so comforting and reassuring.
Sending love to all on this forum.
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Yes
Significant other , got your back , held in anotherās thoughts and arms . Thatās why you hear such things as My other half
How do we live now like this , itās beyond words so painful .
How do we .
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This is so spot on ā¦I really miss my OH calling me when Iām at the shops or
Checking Iām okay when he went away to stay at his dadsā¦ just knowing he would rescue me if i needed it or had my back
I have grown up kids but we donāt speak everydayā¦
I donāt like this life one bit
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Hi Mandy,
I never feel good when I wake in the morning.
I am trying hard to reconnect and maybe make new friends. I have joined a club but I find looking at the events overwhelming. Are you getting out and about ?
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My partner passed away In January
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Hi Elite,
I was also with my partner for four years. Miss him so much
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@Christina47 hi
No, im not going out yet. Probably when i do ill go over to Liverpool on my own.
Nick passed away 20th April on a Saturday, so thats a difficult day for me.
Ill probably go to an exhibition, get lunch. Look round the shops and come home like what me & Nick used to do.
Im going to the Chapel of rest today to see him for the first time and get him ready.
Its still very raw 
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@Loobyloo2
We have 3 dogsā¦ if we didnāt i wouldnāt have got out of bed or gone out.
I have to get back for them and their routine. Probably the only thing keeping me going.
The dogs and my Nick
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