It is jss and we Cant fix it .this is life its crushed us .we have to try accept this is the new Normal. It has to get easier. Your heart cant take it . Sending you lots of luv. And a big hug love zoe x
Yes thanks Zoe lots of love to you to , take care xxxx
I have my daughter and her children i have to try for them .and my beautiful boy sam. It dont make sense does it xxx
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Such lovely photos xxx
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Beautiful photos Zoe. Nobody can take away your memories. So special.
Much love, Kate xx
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Thank you kate .hope your ok . I still have the sad ill memorys of sam .i hope all the good memorys come much love zoe x
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I still have horrific memories of Lisa in hospital but not so often now. I know how to push them away. Normally they come early morning so I get up, no matter how early and start doing stuff.
Later in the day I remember lovely times we shared.
Love and hugs to you Zoe.
Katexx
Beautiful photos Zoe, memories to treasure.
It is so hard to keep any kind of positivity. It’s like we just go through the motions. I remember in the early days, my Mum had seen a cousin and they passed a message to me via Mum asking how we were. I felt like screaming and saying “ when you see him tell him we just “exist”.
I know people mean well and are truly sorry but most will never understand (we wouldn’t want them to know by having such tragedy) so it’s impossible to attempt to explain how we feel.
But we can on here, we understand. It’s a lifeline
Love Chris x
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So true. No-one really else it unless they are wearing our shoes, shouldering our heavy hearts and experiencing the pain we carry with us every hour of every day .
Love to you.
Kate xx
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Beautiful photos … thank you for sharing them xx
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Thats lovely Victoria .hope you are well and ok love zoe x
Thank you Zoe. Sometimes it is good to be reminded of how far we have come and how we never thought we would make it.
I am approaching the anniversary of losing Gemma so very hard … my mind keeps slipping back to that time. Wish I could turn the clock back.
How are you doing? xxx
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Hi victoria
I still dont think its real .28th tomorrow is the day me and sam went to the marsden. Got told he was terminal .they gave him less than a year .he past 27th april .4 months from the day we found out . He was the bravest boy held my hand and said oh mum thought id have 10 years .he never cried he never moaned.from that day he seemed to get in so much pain. So on the 13th march day after his birthday he went to the hospice the was wonderful we stayed for two weeks .sam was no longer in pain .he said he wanted to go home coz it washis nephews birthday .he bought all three really big presents .i feel it was his way of saying goodbye …after that he never left the house again .and past on the 27th april 2021. Peacefully in his sleep .they owed him that my beautiful sam .passed on my mums birthday . Did she come for him…sorry rambling it helps though … am i doing ok . Im trying so hard for my super hero …love to all and thank you xxxxx zoe 
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Oh Zoe, my heart breaks for you. Its awful knowing your child is going to die but we all hope fir a miracle.
I remember thinking in Lisa’s last days that there would be a miracle and she would be OK. Sadly, in real life they don’t often happen.
Life is cruel.
Sending love, Kate xx
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He sounds a lovely boy and certainly a son to be proud of…Life is so cruel to take our children away from us…but they live on in our hearts forever and no one can take that from us
Take care Marina xxx
Hello everyone, My daughter and husband and their 2 young sons have just left, they’ve got a 4 hour car journey ahead of them. The house now looks like a bomb site! Since they left I’ve cried as lot , it’s so quiet and my thoughts are with my son and how I miss him , his phone calls and his text messages . I picked up his urn and hugged it, I keep thinking if he wasn’t on his own when he had the seizure could he have been saved or was the brain tumour untreatable. Life seems unbearable but I’ve got to take each day as it comes. Wishing everyone on here some peace and hope for the future as I know you are all suffering terribly, Pete
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Dear Pete
I am so sorry that you are feeling so upset today. I know how you feel, when people are around you can be distracted from your thoughts and when they go the emptiness and realisation of what has happened hits you all over again, I have felt this many times. I too have gone through the if only’s. If my daughter had gone earlier, if I’d stopped her, I wanted to as she looked tired she may still be here. We have all gone through the if only’s in our minds. We punish ourselves with it. We cannot be sure if events were different that the outcome would have changed. All we can do is take each day as it comes and hope that one day when it is our turn that we will see our precious children again. Keep on posting we are all here for you. Sending hugs to you and your wife.
Deborah 
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Dear Peter, it is so painful. Our son in law has Lisa’s ashes on the work surface in the kitchen together with their dogs ashes, who we looked after for 2 and a half years. We loved that dig so much and so did Lisa.
Whenever I am at their house I pick up her urn and hold her close. Jamie said he was going to.put Jeeves ashes with Lisa’s. Together again over the rainbow.
Cry as much as you need to. It helps us in some way.
One day at a time dear soul.
Much love, Kate xxx
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