Hello mouser
Im so sorry for your loss of your beautiful son sam . This world is cruel.right now uour in great shock. Theres no words that will make it ok .but you have come to a nice place .this site i would be lost without it .its my lifeline . I also had a son sam .he had sarcoma a very rare cancer .in four months he was gone very wicked .life changes for always. Take small steps we all here for you sending you love rake care my friend x
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Hi Jim theres a question .when i saw sam suffering yes
Maybe .but no .i could never want my memorys of his beautiful life to .the fun the laughter my best friend.real mad but sam fought to be here had open heart surgery at three days old his heart valves all plumbed wrong .my baby fought to survive .24 when he got told news he had cancer .but the life he had he was so happy so kind . His short life taken but he was happy the memorys the fun the laughter here for always my grandchildren talk about him like hus still here they worshipped him .my grandaughter tells me sam walked with me in the woods today nan ā¦dont be sad he knows im looking after you .its sad beyond words but what can we do .without memorys that would be so much worse .i couldnt imagine sam not to have been here making me belly laugh with out silliness .
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But if our memorys was wiped clean we would know no different xx
Hi victoria it must be very hard for you not knowing how she was truly feelingā¦my cousin seemed like the happiest man alive he was a councilor. He took his life at 35 left a letter .all the family was so shocked he left a boy of four. Mental health is so great .im so sorry victoria sending you a big hug love zoe 
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Dear āMouserā, I am so very sorry for your loss. The pain of losing a child is terrible. I donāt know how we go on, but we have to make the effort for the other people in our lives who may be grieving too.
My beloved son died in April, of a brain tumour. It is not just the sorrow of missing our children, it is also the memory of how they suffered that is hard to bear.
I do hope you have kind friends and family to support you at this time. People on this site are also grieving for their children. We try to help each other along this bitter path.
May your pain ease a little and may you hold on to happy memories.
Best wishes to you - and to everyone else who writes here.
Peace and love,
SusanJ 
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Thank you Zoe. You are so lovely always thinking of others. Much love xxx
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Thank you everyone. It is nice to be with people who have experienced something similar.
I wish there were people around me grieving too but I moved here a few years ago and live alone. No friends here knew my late son. Should I think of moving near my daughter in Glasgow I wonder.
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Grief is a lonely place .people are strange they dont know what to say .even close friends have let me down . This site is a godsend . Some one always here . Love to all .feeling sorry for my self have flu been in bed for two days .not very good at stayingnin my minds goes on 0verdrive
my beautiful sam
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It is indeed a lonely place. I was visiting my sister who lost her husband 14 months ago. I love her to bits but she talked all the time about how hard it was and how she misses him so much. Soā¦ here I am having lost a beautiful child, only 31 years old , her baby left behind to grow up without her, my heart aches for her, like every one of us here ache for our lost children. I just sat there choking back my tears thinking , you have no idea how bad it is to lose a child. Itās completely a different level to losing a partner!
Anyway, like you say this site is a lifeline.
Hope you feel better soon Zoe, itās not easy with all that time to think.
Love to you.xxx
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Hi zoe
Lovey photos , Sam such a lovely brave boy, it just breaks your heart. Itās so true no one can understand this pain only those who have lost a child, we are in a different world now. I feel sometimes it seems to others that we are just lacking in some way, like we should be getting over it, oh if only it was that simple. How do you get over the feeling that your heart has been ripped out? I really donāt know how we get through this. Hope you feel better soon.
Hugs Jess xx
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Hello dear friends , I have been reading all your posts, and I can feel all of your pain , Zoe such beautiful photos of Sam , he was such a wonderful son and uncle . . John and I have had this awful virus and it has left me feeling really low . We went out for a couple of hours today to get a bit of fresh air . And I felt really emotional , thinking back to this time nearly 6 years ago when Dawn started to get really sick , we used to visit her but she was so sick , she had come disabled and used to sit in her wheelchair with her head down not being able to eat anything . So when she went into hospital the end of November , I was so leased , she was so sick for a fee days, but then she was really chirpy , laughing and making planes for the future . Then a couple of days later went into the deepest of comas . And then told she only had aboutb2?days to live , Hiw can you get over something like that . . I am sure Dawn knew we were there , as whe
N she was fitting , we told her to calm and she did . We were with her when she passed at 2.15 in the morning and that is all I want to be thankful for . But now life is not the same anymore , I am a different person my heart is still broken after 6!years . Dawn was my rock . . . But I am so sure she will be there to meet us when we go . Sorry to be so depressing Maddie xxxx
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Dear Zoe, such lovely photos of your darling Sam. Such a handsome young man and so heartbreaking for you ā¦ thinking of you xxx
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Maddie I truly believe they are with us even now in spirit. I often look at photos of my daughter and try to tell myself sheās dead but my heart canāt accept it. It feels like sheās still close. A strange thing happened the week she died, forgive me if I ramble, but on the evening of Thursday Dec 22nd 2016 our very placid old dog became very agitated, spooked almost. On Saturday morning, Christmas Eve, we had a phone call from our eldest daughter to say the police had been to see her to tell her our other daughter had taken her own life - on that Thursday evening! My husband, a straight talking Yorkshireman and not given to flights of fancy, asked how on earth did the dog know. And itās taken me nearly 6 years to fathom it out - it must have been because Heidiās presence was already with us but we didnāt know it. Suddenly it made perfect sense. And yes, Iām sure sheāll be the angel God sends to meet me when my time comes. I may be wrong but it gives me such comfort. Sending love and hope to you, and all of us on this sad journey, Kathy x
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Dear all, Itās really good and comforting to hear how so many parents believe our loved ones are still with us in some way. I really hope that this is the case. There have been a few odd unexplained things that have happened since our daughter died in May, who was just 19, and she took her own life, although it could have been accidental because she was so scared that night. I donāt feel my daughter is with me now although I talk to her everyday and say goodnight to her every night, as I try to stay open minded. Xxx
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Dear Andy, always good to stay open minded. I lost my daughter 4 years ago. Shortly afterwards when I was so heartbroken and talking to her through my tears, I said āGemma where are you?ā Straight away I heard her voice say āIām here Mum!ā I knew immediately that was what she would say and it was her voice. I know it is hard to explain but I have also felt her close to me at times.
I am sure your daughter is close to you too and you will feel her presence somehow.
xxx
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Hi you lovely people thank you for your love and care .your the only people i can relate toā¦
Hi maddie hope you and your husband are
feeling better .this virus has knocked me for six . Feel very low x
Hi jess love to hear from you .i kniw how hard it is sending you a hug .
Kate people dont have a clue .the pain hurts so much .
Victoria i hooe the sun shines on you .
All on here srnding you love
When i went to see the spiritualist she said to much . My mum dad baby Elsie. She said sam likes the new frontroom .the aftershave is him .hes with our dog ben she couldnt possibly know .sam loved music theres music. Hes around the kids too to much . But now i think are they sad waiting for us to come back. The reading was amazing but i want the real thing are they ok where they are. She said no pain .the things we cling on too but its all i have take care sorry for rambling if only we had a magic wand love to all love zoe
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Andy there are things we just canāt explain. Lisa was a florist and a few weeks after she passed my husband and I were sitting watching TV. Suddenly I felt the room go ice cold and there was a very strong scent of Roses and flowers generally.
I leapt from.my chair slightly shaken and Alan said āwhatās wrong?ā I said, ā donāt you feel it and the strong smell of Roses?ā He hadnāt, just me. I felt Lisa was letting me know she was near and came to give me comfort.
Who knows? I just know that it happened.
Love to you Andy.
Kate xx
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Dear Kathy , Andy , and Victoria , I am so sorry for the loss of your Darling Girls . Losing them like you did was the worse possible way , my heart goes out you . Atlleast we were at Dawn bedside when she passed , if I hadent I donāt know what state of mind I would have been in , and she passed peacefully in the end . One big breath and a small and she slipped out of our lives for ever . But I am 100 per cent she is going to be there to meet us when itās our turn . She told us that through Jackies reading . We canāt wait to see her the week before DWns anniversary which is Dec 11 th . We have to believe what they are telling us . With loveMaddie xxxx
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Thank you Maddie, Kate, Victoria.
I would never have believed how painful losing a child would be. As Jim describes so well itās not easy for people who have not lost a child to understand the depth of pain and complexity. Itās often described as the worst loss. I do hope that our children are somewhere safe and it just isnāt the end for them, and also for us when we eventually die. Xxxx
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Its not the end for them i truly believe that .there around us .where they want to be .but in a different way . We will see them again .there all around us where they belong xxx
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