Oh gosh Ian, you have huge problems. The fact that you were not married excludes you from so many things. As you are not next of kin , decisions what to do with the ashes, pension, inheritance excludes you unless Jayne had everything very organised and a very good will.
Do you have children?
Grieving is so exhausting and difficult without all these extra rubbish you have to deal with. We’re your in laws nice to you when Jayne was around?
Sadie x
Thinking of you and your family Sheila,much love Corinna xx
It’s criminal the way Jayne’s family are treating you, they should be utterly ashamed of themselves, Jayne chose to be with you and they should respect her wishes.
I truly hope you get everything sorted out for yourself and the memory of your loving partner.
Money most certainly brings the worst out in people and at a time when compassion should be at the top of everyone’s agenda. The greed of some certainly beggars belief.
Blessings for courage through this very difficult time for you
Jen☆
Just spent ages catching up on everyone’s messages.My thoughts are with you all,this is such a tough journey that we are all facing.I haven’t managed to get dressed yet,still wrapped up in Roy’s dressing gown.This site is such a support,sending peace to everyone,Corinna xx
Thank you Sadie ,no issues with the family at all when Jayne was here.no will,but i had fill pension form in,like ive said in previous posts,i just hope theres enough if it goes to me,to be able get a burial plot and put Jaynes ashes in it and me when i die.other than that im not bothered.
Thank You,
if only Jaynes family could of been nice or slightly supportive.
Dear Ian
You are with Jayne and you always will be - because it is in your heart that you truly hold them. I am not religious but I do believe the light inside the person that makes them who they are is not part of our worldly bodies. I was a coward and have not and will not go and see my husband in the chapel of rest - no matter how much I want to hold his hand and stroke his hair as the light will have gone from his eyes and it is that light that was his very being. So I talk to him and stroke his watch as if it was his hair and know that he would be happy with that. Everyone is different but that is how we were. How can people be so nasty at times like this - it does all come down to greed and jealousy. When you take a pension out you have to nominate someone - if you are that nominee - tough on the parents. Although it is easier to be married - if you can prove you have contributed to the house you may find you are able to challenge them. And why the heck call you and talk like that to you - how nasty. None of us know what is round the corner - it is all scarey. When my mother asked her partners daughter for some of his ashes so she could scatter them where they were most happy - she gave them to her in a coffee jar. How disrespectful and hurtful was that. I hope Karma came round and bit her … as it will bit Jayne’s mother. Treat others as you would want to be treated yourself - but there are some mean people out there that do not subscribe to that.
Keep talking on here - a worry shared…
Trisha .
Dear Sheila
Thank you for letting us know as I know I am not the only one who has been thinking of you and your daughter in law. I’m so sorry to hear that her father is now fighting the same disease and please pass on sympathy for her mother who must be so worried about them both. The whole family must be under such stress. I hope you are feeling OK in your self and taking care of yourself too while you play such an important role in all this. Sending love, Jacqi xx
I’ve just heard that my wonderful brother has passed away. All those heartbreaking feelings have all come to the surface again and I’m back in the pit of grief that I faced last November.
Cassie, I am so very sorry
Sending love
Sadie xx
Aw Cassie life is so cruel. If there is anyone up there they are so unfair. How can anyone be expected to suffer this hell again. My thoughts are with you. Bless you xx
Cassie…
…from one person who is grieving the loss of a partner of only 5 weeks ago, I can only send you a (((hug))) and my heartfelt condolences…
Jackie…
Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts. Xx
I’m so sorry Cassie. Life is so unfair and has a habit of hitting you when you are down. I hope you have people close to you to give you support and comfort. xx
I’m on my own as my sister is away in Cornwall and I can’t get through to her. Non existent mobile signal where she is xx
Don’t know if anyone is watching Countryfile at the moment but Osborne House (Queen Victoria’s home) is on it and I live a few minutes walk from the house and being a member of English Heritage I walk around these grounds all the time with the dogs. It is quite beautiful and I love walking the gardens and terrace. It is quite therapeutic.
Pat xx
Wow Pat, what a lovely place to live!!
So now I know where to go and find you
S xx
Sending you love Sheila and good positive energy
Words are a bit useless at moments like this!
Sadie xxx
Sheila, I woke up this morning and couldn’t get your family out of my mind. I can’t imagine what you are all going through. Your daughter in laws mother must be in bits. One member of family is heartbreaking but two doesn’t bare thinking about.
I have this evening put on the forum that I live a few minutes walk from Queen Victoria’s home of Osborne House a short way from the house is a church that she used. It’s a tourist attraction now but still used locally. I walked past it this morning and although it was too early to go in I sat on a bench overlooking the river in the grounds of the church and said a prayer for your family, I hope you don’t mind. It’s a lovely setting and I sit there often.
When Brian was diagnosed after the initial shock I was determined that my Brian wasn’t going to die. I began searching for everything I could find out about the C. I also discovered that Doctors are not allowed to offer any help regarding alternative medicine or diet. I have been told that this attitude is now changing but ten years ago it was a very different story. Brian was offered no treatment as it had spread too much. I didn’t go on the internet though. I have a library of books that I purchased and spent hours in the library, made phone calls. We changed diet, taking out things and putting others in. I learnt about the vitamins, minerals, fruit, veg that would help. It gave him another ten years of life, most of this he was healthy and fit. I was told it was a miracle which is no consolation now. But I say to anyone in your position don’t just rely on the Doctors, take your own life in your hands.
The very best to you all and you are in my and I am sure everyone else’s thoughts.
Pat xx
Dearest Cassie55 My hear goes out to you I lost my brother who I was very close to 2yrs ago and then just 7mth 2 wks ago I lost my soulmate Dave. You feel everything is falling apart as two of the most important people in your life has gone, but we don’t have a choice but must just take each day at a time. We never get over the dreadful lost but just manager it each day. lots of hugs Queenie