Mine was a Martin too. A good name x Heartsand
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Aww bless…please look after yourself. Sending you 
. X
I get the same feelings that its all a bad dream There;s been occasions when I’ve been out to the shops or somewhere and met someone I’ve not seen for a while and think to myself “Oh, must tell Val who I’ve seen today” and then it hits like a ton of bricks…she’s gone
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I’ve just turned 66 but still feel like a spring chicken so I’m determined to hit 2025 with all the resilience I’ve got. It will only be 6 months since I lost my everything by then but I want to feel some of the weight lift, hold his hand and step into our new future as a team. As someone who’s been widowed twice I know I can’t change what’s happened, only how I deal with it! Xx
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Just come back from Morrisons and as I walked round the corner to our house I had the strongest impression that Bridget was walking towards me. My throat went tight and I had to stop. Her walk, her coat, her smile as she sees me. All an illusion.
These things are bound to happen I’m told. How can it be otherwise after 30 years? Just goes to show how alone you can feel and how much you need them back
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Im going to try my best to try make somekind of life but its so hard i really dont know how to we been together since 17 yr old my husband died at 59 yr old i found him dead at side of our bed , 2yrs later i still see the image every time i walk into our bedroom over and over again this group is nice because someone always liserning and truely know how deverstating it is x
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My 2nd xmas too and I feel the same, worse than last year xx
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Oh yes, life can be so cruel…to all of us here…
Thank you and hope you will have better days too…will be thinking of you over Christmas…best wishes.
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You feel lonely when alone…and even more lonely when surrounded by people…because the one person you want to be with is not with you 
Take good care everyone x
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Have you thought of moving, an image like that is hard to live with. I’ve just had a few days away and I felt better, as soon as I got home I knew I was going to move
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That’s so sad I am so sorry I can’t imagine how painful it must be for you.
Sending a big hug x
Friends and family have asked me what I want for Christmas. Only two things.
1 - My Bill back
2 - To be with him
Number one I know I can’t have.
Number two is not within my control.
Ater six months I am more upset than ever. Floods of tears every morning. I don’t want this life any more but feel so helpless because there’s nothing I can do about it.
Funeral directors have let me down. They told me the headstone would be ready in 6 weeks and would be up before Christmas. It hasn’t happened and they now tell me 12 - 14 weeks. That news didn’t help my mood - more tears.
I apologise to everyone for being a wimp but just can’t help it.
Miss him so much 
Love and hugs to you all 
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Lost12
I carnt aford to move im only just getting by , i had another counciling session yesterday they said it will help me so anything worth a try , he asked if i had suicidal thoughts i said i would not do that to my kids and grandkids i love them too much , i told him pretending im ok in front of family and friends is absolutely exhausting, then it builds up and when alone im a mess councillor said by putting a act im ok on people carnt help if they dont know how low i am i suppose it makes sense x
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Hi, In no way are you being a wimp, we all understand what you’re going through, and are here to support each other . Its really tough for many of us right now with the approach of Christmas. We see people full of the joys of spring whilst we just want to hide away and pretend its not happening. I dread Christmas now and it holds no happiness for me as my darling wife passed the day before in 2020. Hopefully we all get through it as best we can and look forward to brighter days in the New Year
Take care
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Sending a big hug and love to everyone on here who has lost someone x it’s not a good time of the year for me x
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Big hug xx
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Your not being a wimp, we all feel these things and its so very hard coping without your soul mate especially this time of yr, I would rather be on my own this xmas but cant say that to my son and his family, but I will survive as I did last year with my daughter and her family, somehow I feel worse this year which I was not expecting !
Take care and I’m sure all of us on here will cope over the festive season the best we can and when on our own at night I am sure the tears will flow as they do most nights xx
Take care everyone xxx
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This time of the year is so hard. I lost my dearest husband in August this year very suddenly and I am finding it harder to cope now than I did say 4 weeks ago. Im kind of expected now by some to “get on with it” and apart from my immediate amazing children , Im putting a brave act on. But tomorrow is my birthday as well as the festive season and ive left my home in the North to be with my daughter and family in London. After 52 years of getting a card and a hug its just too painful to be at home and everyone I know ive said no cards just this year. Most seem to get it, i cant celebrate this year. So I hope 2025 comes around quick and is a better year.
Regards to all on here at this very hard time. Heartsand x
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Festive Season is hard for us all to get through without our beloved
Love & hugs to all
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It is so hard. It is my birthday today. I don’t feel the same. There are flowers everywhere. I can’t look at them and see their beauty. They just remind me of death. I can’t do this new life x
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