Hi Ann
This song gets me every time the lyrics are so relatable to me. I cry everywhere when it comes on it’s so sad and so heartbreaking 
Best wishes to you and everyone…
Big hugs X
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I can relate to that. It’s only been 3 months since my husband passed away. Today was especially hard for me as it was the anniversary of our first date 50 years ago. We were married for 48 years and I’m lost. However I am trying to get on with life. I’ve just come home from playing carpet bowls in the village. My husband used to play so I find it comforting to play with his friends.
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My goodness 50 years anniversary I can’t imagine how painful today must be for you.
I know how painful it is for me losing him after 37 years together- but 50 years, I am so sorry for your loss! Sending love and hugs to you today!
I can relate to you spending time with his friends as I too find so much comfort in talking to his friends and his family. It helps to include him in everything I say or do as if he was still around every single day.
Take care x
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Finally in Malta - what a beautiful little island - was here with my beloved over 20 years ago so it’s bringing back the old memories. Arrived last night and haven’t been able to stop thinking about him ever since. My angel would have loved being here so I am going to try enjoy as I possibly can for both of us, to me he’s with me every where I go every thing I do - my angel I love 
and miss you more than I can say
Sending best wishes to everyone.
Hope you all have a good festive time as you can X
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Hi @Angel1309
Glad you made it to Malta.
I was there about 15 years ago and it was beautiful then.
I hope you enjoy the memories of being there with him and the happiness and 
you have together then and now.
Sending you hugs and love 
Enjoy your time
Lynne Xx
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Hi Lynne
Thank you so much for your kind words.
I’m cherishing every moment here with my beloved angel in my heart and mind
Love & big hugs 
Take care X
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It is so hard isn’t it. You just suddenly get blindsided by a song. Mine yesterday was Barry white My first my last my everything. I gave a clip of my sister dancing to that on the last proper night out we had before she was diagnosed with cancer. She then requested it at her funeral along with Albatross. Both leave me in bits. Also our favourite film to watch together was the Sound of Music but I just can’t watch it now
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It’s sad but happy memories too
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Spent 4 days away with my best friend and her family. Cheerful on the outside throughout but in such turmoil on the inside but didn’t want to spoil their time so I kept my mask on! It got worse on Boxing Day realising I was going home to an empty house my heart sank. Crashed in at my friend’s place as we flew back quite late last night, now dreading going home to be lonely again 
Hope we all get through to the New Year peacefully & positively as we can.
Take care everyone X
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Today is the first anniversary of my husband’s passing. Christmas was weird on my own. Last Christmas day he was in hospital on end of life care. Heavily sedated so I just sat and held his hand and talked to him out trivial things. I miss him so much. He was my rock. Friend had invited me for Christmas dinner but couldn’t face it. I just couldn’t sit there and put on a happy face when I feel so lost inside. It is hard at times to keep putting a mask on for other people. I go out to a few different groups, and the people are so lovely and many are in the same position. I have made a couple of really good friends who I know will be there for me, but it can’t take away the emptiness you feel inside. It is the empty house in the evenings that is hardest to bear. Hope everyone can get through the New Year as positively as we can. I am spending the day reminiscing through old photos and all the good times we had. Anything to take away the image lying in his hospital bed last year. We were married for 51 years and together for 55
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Hi @ Caw1
1st Christmas 
without my husband who passed away 8 June this year
This year i spent Christmas on my own.
Last year we spent it with family in Australia together could not go to Australia on my own not strong enough so spent alone. I thought i was doing ok but was i wrong spent Christmas and boxing day crying looking through photos and memories of last year. Sometimes this wave if grief hits and i now learn to just let it happen. Today sad but not so bad as the last 2 days. We were married for 35 years together 38.
Only Hogmanay and New Years Day to get through but it is just another day like all the others we get through since they passed just a named day.
I am planning on just going to bed and waking up it will be 2024 just another day i will wish him happy new year but will miss him wishing me happy new year back.
But im sure wherever he is he woukd be wishing me a happy new year.
Take care and get through this period however you can.
Sebding hugs
Lynne x
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I think you said it “it’s just another day” take care, I fully understand how hard this is x
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OMG I am so sorry to hear what you’ve been through on Christmas Day & Boxing Day I can’t imagine how heartbreaking and devastating it must be for you to have an anniversary of such traumatic loss on the day every other person celebrating. Sending love and hugs to you.
I hate spending dark evenings in the empty home hence accepted my friend’s kind invitation to spend Christmas with her and her family. So wouldn’t have been fair to them to spoil their party spirits really.
However, after spending 4 days with a mask on made me realise that this is it - the new normal - going about doing things I used to do with my angel but at the same time feeling sad and empty inside! The two things go hand in hand and nothing I can do to avoid that so I’ve decided it will be my motto 2024 - so devastatingly hard but I will just have to accept and get on with it.
I hope you approach New Year with love and support from your nearest and dearest after this traumatic Christmas time.
Big hugs X
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Sitting here thinking about spending New Year’s Eve alone is quite overwhelming not sure how it’s going to be.
We used to watch Later…with Jools Holland together on New Year’s Eve every year before counting down to midnight and saying happy new year to each other & starting the new year together!
This year will be watching it alone, saying happy new year to my angel and starting 2024 alone and lonely- I hope he can hear me and be by my side spiritually - my angel I miss you so terribly XXX
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@Angel1309 That’s what Tony and I did for 40 years - watched Later with Jools Holland on New Year’s Eve, countdown to midnight, toast the New Year in and wish each other Happy New Year and have a kiss and hug. I don’t think I can do it this year on my own for the first time. Too painful. I miss him so much. I can’t see things being different in 2024. Just more of the same - sadness, pain, loneliness, longing for him to be here, feeling lost, missing him 24/7 every single day. I will wish my Tony a Happy New Year but not at midnight and I hope he hears me and wishes me a ‘Happy’ New Year as well. Hope you have some peace on New Year’s Eve. Sending you love and hugs.xx
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Thank you.
Sending you love, hugs and best wishes for a peaceful New Year X
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Missing your soulmate
I know how you feel, and this time of year is so hard when you’ve lost your other half you are in a way no longer whole., it’s hard to be cheerful, but you try, and for those brief moments it works, but the hole in my life is enormous. I wish I could get rid of the feeling I’m on on the outside looking in on everyone else’s life, I feel I don’t really fit or belong anywhere… it’s been 18 months and he was in so much pain it was cruel to see, so it was a release to see him not suffer any more, I thought that would make me feel better but the emptiness in my life is huge. Now after 18 months I need to move forward for myself, on the outside to others I look like I’m coping fine but on the inside I’m still in bits I miss him everyday,
I’m cross with myself that I can’t wake up happy that I don’t look forward to a new day like I used to. I just cram my life with keeping super busy, I try not look back too much on what was my life but the future seems pointless and empty, though nobody else would know, so I look like I’m fine on the outside , I’d like to know how you get the warmth back in your daily life do you ever feel truly happy again, I really hope I do,?
Ive got through Christmas, which I was dreading I put the decs up I entertained family I pushed myself to get through I didn’t give myself a chance to feel sad , perhaps I should have, but nobody wants to know how sad you are at Christmas because he’s not there, his name isn’t mentioned because they think it will upset you or maybe they dint think of him life is fur the living I guess, but you’d like them to raise a glass to him but seems they’ve all forgotten him, I haven’t I can’t I won’t, so I smile and say happy Christmas so as not to spoil it for others and as soon as Im on my own it bubbles up and I sob like it was yesterday when I lost him, this can’t continue forever can it? People say remember the happy times and good memories but that only makes me realise there won’t be any more that the love of my life has gone and I have to just have to deal with it and try and move forward and hope I’ll be happy again, I can only hope so.
Sending love to all those rowing the same boat I wish you all get some joy in the New Year x
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Sending love back to you & wishing you & everyone a peaceful New Year X
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Having my daughter and her family over for a couple of days they originally planned to go back this morning but have had a change of heart and will go back tomorrow instead . I was initially anxious about spending New Year’s Eve on my own but now rather contented having family around - I am so thankful for that. However, on the outside I am hosting and entertaining everyone with joy - on the inside, I am sobbing uncontrollably, feeling so sad, empty and ever so lonely and nothing I can do about it . I miss my angel so terribly, every single day I cry nonstop on the inside - on the outside I can only shed tears when all of a sudden grief, guilt, sorrow and emptiness hit me out of nowhere! People keep saying to me I am doing so well - they don’t really see me! My mask stays on naturally when with people and it comes off when by myself. I take so much comfort from talking to him constantly I can sense and feel his warmth, loving. His soft spoken words and images of his movement are forever on my mind.
(I love you so much my angel, even more now than ever and I hope very much that you are happy wherever you are - Happy New Year my love I will leave 2023 and begin 2024 with you in my heart and soul til the day I join you my beautiful angel. With all my love )
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That’s really good @Angel1309 that your family is staying over. I suspect it is taking a huge amount of energy for you to be entertaining. I know precisely these feelings that you have inside.
Hugs and best wishes to you. x
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