I feel the same can see no joy in the future i keep hoping I won’t live too long it’s such a lonely life
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I feel the same. The optimism of the future from those who try’ and soothe and placate us is astonishing. It defines us from them. People are afraid’ of our grief, like it’s a contagion to be avoided at all costs. The loneliness from the absence of our beloved person is the hardest, cruellest torment, no wonder we want the pain to end, to me a natural loving response to our loss. To feel less’ would be an indictment to myself that I should have loved and cared more. Maybe, the grotesque irony is I choose to feel this way.
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Don’t know if allowed but anyone on here from Ipswich area would love to meet chat face to face
I have searching for a local
bereavement group, face to face meetings in my local area Romford Essex, but there is nothing, which I feel is badly needed. Therefore to arrange meeting amongst yourselves is a good idea.
Have you looked to see if you have a sue Ryder grief kind group in you area
Sue
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@Shelly58
At the bottom of this page, this hospice says there might be a bereavement group in Romford.
“Friendly Faces Bereavement Support Groups
Our bereavement support groups in Brentwood, Romford and Wanstead are for anyone in the community who has recently lost a loved one.”
Hope they can can help.
Thank you, I did contact them about six weeks ago, and they could only offer day time phone chat sessions with a hospice counsellor. As I work Mon to Fri daytime I am unable to chat over the phone whilst in work due to privacy issue.
They’ve started a “Bereavement Cafe” at our local crematorium once a month. I’ve been 2-3 times, its on for 2 hours and you just turn up and leave to suit yourself. There are usually 2-3 civil celebrants serving tea and cakes and to lend a listening ear. In a way its nice to be among people in same situation and “compare notes” so to speak
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If you was closer to Norwich,what a good idea,just to see someone who understands ,cup of tea ,biscuit or bit of cake,just now and then ,it’s called support
I believe,not seen much of it yet ,still it’s early days ,six weeks ,haven’t I got over it yet! Self sarcasm,beat myself up mentally
That might help!
I feel for everyone of ‘ us’ out there and writes in to express themselves,my mind is so turbulent,trouble with builders ,insurance people,all on top of losing my dear wife under six weeks ago! Do any of them care a fig ? Actually two really decent
Ladies who try their very best to sort things out ,sadly they are on a losing battle ,try to be heard above a tribe of yelling ,chattering monkeys,I expect I am not allowed to name the insurance company ,they actually haven’t been to bad ,it’s their contractors who have made a right saga of it all,
In between this lot ,I go to bed about 0300to 0430 every night then my dogs wake me up about 0730 every day …getting a bit tired now,strange thing is ,my wife spoke to me while I was asleep,
I never saw her but instantly knew her special voice ,it’s sad the dog woke me up as she was talking to me ,she went then,
Even sadder I can’t remember what she said either,she was putting something from her to clear something up,no good thinking I can recall and make something
Up,that’s pointless,but it is the first time I have heard her,a lot of really strange and weired things have happened since I lost her,and I don’t make things up or imagine things I am rather Black is Black and white is white sort of bloke! All I wish is when my will is done and the two dogs pass on
( I don’t wish them dead,I get company from them ) then unless life changes
I will call it a day,my daughter and granddaughter can benefit,
My heart goes to you all,as only we know how horrible life is now,can of soup time
Don’t want food anymore ,still there is one up,! Of all this ,I have lost a lot of weight,one small smile from me!
If the person in Ipswich area ,if you get really low ,I know that alright ,then put your message up and I will get in touch with the ?? Organisers
To arrange a safe place for both of us that is to meet for coffee,must be something
Around the area,that tiniest chink of human might give us a little gap in the awfulness of it all,
Im a long way from where you live otherwise i would have gladly meet up
That’s a pity ! Is it to far to walk? Joke!
I have had more bad news ,lost my dear wife only just six weeks ago ,loads of trouble with the insurance’ builders ,now the insurance company refuse to insure
The house because it got flooded in the storm ,so I now have a worthless house ,
Don’t think I can take any more ,what’s the point of it all,cowards way out and call it a day ,
All i can say is take one day at a time, life is so cruel its hard trying to deal with house problems when you greving you must feel so emotional and overwhelmed take cake sending hugs and strength
Bless you Tinatina ,even this blasted iPad keeps changing your name ,be assured it’s not me !no I understand where you are coming from ,I can’t go yet got two old dogs to look after ,it’s not their fault all of this ,when they go I will be happy to go ,at least I will get rest! ,You just get driven to it ! If I didn’t have the dogs I would happily go tonight ,still my time will come soon enough,
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Oh dear. That is terrible for you. I’m so sorry x
Thanks Lydia,can life get any worse? I just can’t think how!
That’s awful sorry for you life is cruel
I can so sympathise with so much that is said. I didn’t ask for this life without my Bill. It’s not a life anymore, it’s just an existence. I exist from one day to the next. I have never wished my life away before now but I just wish I could go to sleep and not wake up. At least, wake up with my Bill, who I love with every ounce of my being and miss him more than ever words could express. It’s over 6 months since he passed away and I’m still in bits every morning. The tears just won’t stop. I just feel so helpless.
I’ve got a lot of things I could be doing but can’t work up any enthusiasm.
When I think I can never go shopping with him again, or never visit the garden centre, or never sit in the garden with him again, I ask myself what is the point to anything. If I can’t do any of these things because he’s not here to share, what is the point to me being here.
I’m sorry if you find this so negative but I don’t have anyone I can tell how I feel.
Counselling is no good to me because I know how it works, having done courses on this for a volunteer job I once had.
Guess I’ll just have to plod on and see another day out.
Love 
and hugs to everyone 
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Harriet, I’m sitting here with tears running down my face thinking the exact same things.
We all know we CAN do these things, with family or friends… but we want to do them with our partners, we’ve lost not only them but our future with them.
Even mundane things like food shopping.
I hate it without him
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I am also sitting here crying, I can’t bear the rest of my life without him. Everything you have both said is how I feel. Lots of hugs xxx
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Yes I too are feeling exactly the same. I keep telling myself it is early days! But I know in my heart it won’t get any better.
Best wishes to you all.
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