It’s hard I no get you self up make nice cup of tea. And little steps we all try an help you through here
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@Jol like you I’m no longer afraid to die as I see it simply as a gateway to my wife. Whether it is or not, hardly worth worrying about - it’s ultimately what I place my faith in that matters. I should add that doesn’t mean I’m seeking that outcome, more that I’m not scared by it.
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Hi Hazell,
I too lost my husband last May, married 47 years. I took ill health retirement in Aug 2022 due to various issues with arthritis and migraines, which have all flared up again since losing my husband last May to cancer. The migraine’s especially have come back with a vengeance!
Wake up in the morning hoping it will be a pain free day, but the stresses of being a widow & living alone take their toll, add missing your husband too and most days are not pain free xx
We just have to hope it will get a bit easier in time but how much time I have no idea xxx
Take care and yes go for early retirement, stresses of being a widow are enough without adding work into the equation!
Though I know some people on here are happy to go to work for the distraction, guess it depends on the job you do also xxx
Take care everyone, one day at a time xx
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I’ve started saying to friends please don’t stop asking me how I am.
My response won’t change but it’s the fact you asked shows you care.
It helps being on here
Thinking of you
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I just say “You don’t want to know”, or “Don’t ask”.
They understand and realise that they’ve asked a silly question.
More often people hug me and say nothing, which means a lot more.
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Feel better managed to put Tina ashes in a safe place from a cardboard box into urn taken me 4 months feel better if it makes sense
Inside coop box when I opened it to find two cards with tina finger prints xx now going to get a frame god miss Tina x hope you can visit me again babes soon in my dream x
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That’s a lovely display for your memories.
I put Steve’s (well used) drumsticks, tuning keys, and photo on the hall table which he gave me. His slippers and boots are underneath, his drumming stool next to it.
Comforting.
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Nice memories. That’s all we have now memories trying little by little it’s hard though very xx put tina bike in diner room not as if I’m ever going to sit at the table. That’s my next room to tidy never stops
Tina with the muppet crash helmet bless made my day that ride
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That’s good idea. Think I’ll do same in garden for tina
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Our friends sent me some roses in memory of Roger. There were 5. My daughter and my best friend had one each and I’ve planted the others in pots, in case I move, then I can take them with me. Its a lovely tangible reminder of our love.
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What’s it called will go to garden centre this week
That’s so lovely x
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Ilovehorses. Thankyou
I dont know if I will move but I’m not getting any younger and its how long I can manage the large garden.
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@KMCG oh yes I have no plans to leave until
It’s my time . It’s just my belief that on that day my Andrew will be there to take me with him
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Morning everyone
Me too, no plans on moving yet.
But where i stay is quite isolated and transport not great and i dont drive. The garden is too big to handle. I have a gardener starting this week to help me.
My neighbours are all in their 70 and 80’s but all have their partners.
I am the only widow and youngest at 66 and living on my own everyone else still have their partners around.
Once i find travelling harder or issues with motility i may have to rethink to move closer to accessing public transport.
Wishing everyone a good week ahead
Take care
Lynne x
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Hi lyn and all me too not moving got to many memories we both made here smashed the garden to how we want it same as bungalow inside have lovely people around inviting me coffee an how I’m doing . But when Tina was here if we was in front doing cars cleaning o we got was morning and now coffee I only wish they offered when Tina was around only wish we could all go back in time stop the clock an start again xx to be honest there not a lot I would change x but I’m sure Tina would stop bying gadget’s from Aldi . An I still do I can here a say put it back you don’t need it. X have a lovely day if you can better still have lovely week
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Whether I move will depend on whether I can manage the house and garden. But wherever I go Roger will be with me. We had talked about downsizing last year, and after he became ill, but it was too late for him by then.
I’ve planned this week so lets see if that can keep me going. Its the mornings and evenings on my own I’m struggling with. Doesnt matter how many people I see or where I go, I still have to come back to this empty house
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That’s how I feel I’m away with family at the moment but not looking forward to going back home to empty house x
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How on earth do we get past this. The pain and heartbreaķ is still there whatever we do
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My wife and I spoke about this and all she said was take my ashes wherever you go. I don’t have plans to move but there are so many memories here that everything is painful. I then think but if I move I’ll miss those familiar things, will I be erasing her slightly which equally upsets me. I don’t know what will happen but I know one day my son and his partner will move and he’s keen that I join them in terms of location so we shall see as that’s not anytime soon.
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