Missing you ❤️

Hi lyn and all me too not moving got to many memories we both made here smashed the garden to how we want it same as bungalow inside have lovely people around inviting me coffee an how I’m doing . But when Tina was here if we was in front doing cars cleaning o we got was morning and now coffee I only wish they offered when Tina was around only wish we could all go back in time stop the clock an start again xx to be honest there not a lot I would change x but I’m sure Tina would stop bying gadget’s from Aldi . An I still do I can here a say put it back you don’t need it. X have a lovely day if you can better still have lovely week

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Whether I move will depend on whether I can manage the house and garden. But wherever I go Roger will be with me. We had talked about downsizing last year, and after he became ill, but it was too late for him by then.
I’ve planned this week so lets see if that can keep me going. Its the mornings and evenings on my own I’m struggling with. Doesnt matter how many people I see or where I go, I still have to come back to this empty house

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That’s how I feel I’m away with family at the moment but not looking forward to going back home to empty house x

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How on earth do we get past this. The pain and heartbreaķ is still there whatever we do

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My wife and I spoke about this and all she said was take my ashes wherever you go. I don’t have plans to move but there are so many memories here that everything is painful. I then think but if I move I’ll miss those familiar things, will I be erasing her slightly which equally upsets me. I don’t know what will happen but I know one day my son and his partner will move and he’s keen that I join them in terms of location so we shall see as that’s not anytime soon.

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Maybe its too soon to be making any big decisions. I was never any good at making decisions before, now I’ve got to on my own
Many people have said give it a year.
If I do decide to move it will be in the same village, I have family and friends here and I need them x x

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Just see this. How true x looks like rain down in Portsmouth had plans today. O well they keep for tomorrow .house work instead

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@Martin - that is so true, so very true - thank you for sharing. Kevin

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I think even if we moved the emptiness and loneliness will follow… I’m in a small courtyard but full of older people in there mid 80s to 90s I’m only 58 but I swear it’s aging me…we downsized 7 years ago and my grandson piped up a few years ago and said
Is this the house your die in Nan :sob:
We only had a year of retirement together…
I’m thinking I may go back to work in the winter months for my sanity…

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Morning Martin
My blossom tree is a crab apple called Malus sun Rival

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I know people who have moved and they say the emptiness just went with them .x

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Yes I think the emptiness is deep inside.
But do I need to be rattling around in a 3 bedroomed house with a large garden that Im going to have trouble managing?

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I am staying put, there are so many beautiful memories here in our home just can’t bear to think of being anywhere else at the moment maybe in a few years I probably need to downsize. Right now everywhere I turn my angel is there to comfort me and that makes me very safe and happy :orange_heart:, bless you my love I hope you are at peace wherever you are :orange_heart:
Take care everyone x

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I think the emptiness will be there deep inside forever - I am trying very hard to adjust and accept that this is the new normal, hard, painful but can’t be avoided sadly :sob: :sob:
Take care x

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I’m looking out the patio doors at the Pear Tree which is in full blossom. We also have an Apple Tree over the other side of the garden, it’s less fruitful but when you do get an apple from it, wow. This will be the first harvest without my wife. She was the instigator and named the trees; Apple - Ernie, Pear - Bert - no I’ve no idea but I think it was characters from Sesame Street? I have no idea how I will react to nature as it unfolds and the trees need harvesting, but, something tells me to plan something celebratory. We’ll see. As others have said I don’t think there will be a day goes by that I don’t grief (crave) the company of my loved one but that’s ok, she was / is worth it. Kevin

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I have a beautiful cherry blossom tree that my husband bought me for my birthday a few years ago and it has just come into bloom. We both loved it so much that it makes me sad that he cant see it now. Just got to get the rest of the garden sorted now.

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Yesterday I made a start on trying to tame the jungle my garden has become these last few months. The weather was lovely. I thought I’d carry on today but today its raining :cloud_with_rain:. Its a shame because for a while I was doing something we had both enjoyed. Today I’m back to trying to cope

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My husband had bought a beautiful green shed but returned it later as there was a problem finding someone to assemble it just a couple of weeks before he passed away! I reordered a few weeks ago and had it put up and now I think of him whenever I look out into the garden especially when it’s sunny I feel he is by my side admiring it with me I hope he really is :revolving_hearts:

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So very true @Martin2 and that image on that morning will stay with me forever xxx

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Yep I’ll never forget shut my eyes see to live it again and again x weather down here is horrible none stop rain an wind roll on summer

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