So sorry for your loss we feel your pain ,Its hard luv people say it gets easier but i dont think it dose , think we start to learn to live along side of grief so they keep telling me , after funeral its like everyone returns back to their same life but we left so numb and lonely , talking on here help a little because everyonne is grieving our own loss , ive got friends but they all got husband’s so i find it hard if we go out for coffee they constantly moaning about their husband’s and where they going holidays etc it makes me emotional to think not only have i lost my Husband ive lost my life, xx
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Exactly my sentiments 
life is never the same again without our soulmate
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Please keep sharing - we are all here to share and support one another.
Take good care xx
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I feel exactly the same way it’s hard to think that you are on your own now and how do you carry on Even other family members have there partners and they tell you what they are doing and it’s all really upsetting isn’t it 
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I know its so hard to see everyone getting on with their life, but ours has stopped. You can’t imagine a lofe without the person you fell in love with and made a life with. The nights are so lonely, and you just sit there watching the tv, but you’re not paying any attention to it. It’s just too drown out of the silence 
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Dear @N8658
EXACTLY SO!!!
I could have written that .
Thank you .
Love hugs and strength to everyone on here
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Too true been nearly 1 year for me.
Tv is on for background noise cant remember when i watched a full tv programme 
Love DR WHO and even haven’t watched the Christmas episode yet and due to start new episode next week
Take care
Lynne
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Yes, it’s like your concentration has gone. Nothing seems to interest you anymore. It’s like a big, dark cloud hanging over you. Nothing makes sense! Big hugs to everyone on here xx
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Totally agree. Exactly the same for me.
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We all are going through the same sad, painful and terribly lonely journey 
Will it ever get better - who knows? The only thing we can do is try to get used to this new normal I suppose
Take care & big hugs to everyone
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Dear @N8658 and all of you posting
It’s so hard isn’t it.
19 months for me and I don’t feel any different, any more healed, I’m still hurting so much.
TV is a struggle. It’s always on , like you say the noise /sound of conversation is just there to break the silence. Can’t concentrate on the content of the programmes. Often keep rewinding cos I’ve missed what was going on!
I’ve even tried turning the subtitles on , so I can read them, thinking that my help me concentrate more!!
Can’t watch programmes we enjoyed together, can’t watch the programmes I liked but he didn’t. It’s so strange, and impossible to explain to others.
In the recordings on sky TV , I’ve still got all the programmes he had recorded. Some were set on record series. I’ve stopped that, and I did delete some episodes recorded after he died, but all the ones recorded before he died are there in the sky recordings for him to watch when he wants to incase he hadn’t got round to it yet.
Grief makes us into strange beings doesn’t it. If I tried to explain this to others I’m sure they’d think I’d lost the plot!
Love and hugs and strength to you all
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No, you’ve not lost the plot. You’re just going through grief, and it is an emotional rollercoaster ! Big hugs 
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Thank you
It is all so true. I do many things since my partner passed away that make me seem quite mad, yet currently those things help me get through every day.
We all understand this ‘madness’ and actually if it works as a coping mechanism (even for a little while) who is it hurting.
Love to all.
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Thank you Elite.
On sofa, my new bed, with our two dogs, but having a very very wobbly time
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Hi everyone. I think I could have written any of these posts tonight. The tv on for noise, the mad things we do, but they’re not mad to me. The sadness, the loneliness, the roller coaster that is grief. The big dark cloud. Then there’s the wanting to dream of him, and when I do, breaking my heart when I realise it was just a dream, especially the not nice ones, how is it the worst dreams stay in your mind longest, the nice ones vanish so quickly?
I hope everyone has a peaceful night
Love and hugs to you all
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The sofa has been my bed many nights. Whatever helps xx
It really is upsetting especially when inside we falling apart , they havnt got a clue how the pain we feel , ill be 60 next week i was supposed to be going away for couple off days but my cousin she gave backword but that was only when i asked whats is time etc arrangements, she just said or i carnt go now ! Yesterday i cleaned my car inside and out even waxed it ,then this morning a little white fether on my back light i smiled and thought my hubby giving me his approval for a job welldone
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@Tinatina
Well done on cleaning your car
Your husband was definitely giving you the thumbs up. 
Sod your cousin. I’m so sorry you’ve been let down by her.
Love, hugs and strength to you
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Thankyou i believe so too , it really good to talk on ere people understand how i feel because you all feel the same way , i feel as if my friends think i should be trying more to get on with my life but its not that easy as you all know they still got husband’s i feel so alone we used to go places as couples but no more , i live for my kids and grandkids they keep me going but i put a coping face on when they are with me them have meltdowns when im on my own , i dont want to worry them i want them to get on in life x
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