Reena, it’s so sad you had to do this on your own. My feeling is that it is your decision what you do next and if you want to keep Akhil’s ashes near you at home, then you must. Don’t worry too much about tradition, as ideas change over time. It’s about you and Akhil, no-one else. I am going to keep Simon’s in the house until we decide what to do and that could be some months.
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Reena sending you hugs.
I think it would be a good idea to keep Akhil at home with you if that’s what you want. Lauren’s eldest daughter who lives with us now frequently talks to Lauren’s ashes which are sat on the bookshelf, she has admitted she gets comfort from doing that and that’s why she wants some of Lauren’s ashes in a little urn that she can put in her room.
That time will also give his brother the opportunity to rethink his decision.
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Reenah
I hope you are able to keep the ashes with you. I have my son with me at my home. I talk to him all the time, it gives me comfort he is with me. You do what feels right for you. We are mothers grieving our children it should be our choice xx
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Thank you ladies… the thought of my boy in a small box and just looking at it and his photo is killing me. I need to rethink everything and I don’t think I can make any decisions right now xx
Hugs to you all… I’m now trying to sort out our boiler!! What a day!
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My son would have been 29 today. We have been to the cemetery - love to you all. We are now off for a day out to Battersea Power Station.
(Not sure if photos will upload!)
Xxxxx
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Of course you cant make any decisions right now. Its one day at a time. It hurts so bad though i know x
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Ali7, what beautiful flowers and what a wonderful tribute to your darling son. Xx
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I’m keeping my son’s ashes. I will take some to scatter in our favourite places but the rest will stay with me. I want our ashes mixed and scattered together. Typing this has me in floods of tears. I desperately need to see him .
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Well it’s done, Ben is in his final resting place.
I did all the reading, I found a poem I liked, a piece of music and a little prayer. I’m not religious but I did have him christened and I like to think he’s somewhere waiting and watching us. His son came and we all placed flowers on the casket.
I visited later as the stone had been placed.
That’s when it hit me, as I was cutting the rose stalks to fit in the vase. Broke down sobbing.
I’m home now and calmer. I bought orange roses as I love bright colours and I knew Ben would know they’re from me.
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What a beautiful inscription and beautiful roses. Well done for reading everything yourself, a very difficult thing to do. I’m sure your son was very proud of you. Xx
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Beautiful.
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Beautiful but so very sad a son shouldnt be parted from his mother. Sat cryjng 
xx
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Thank you ladies, I’m very sad but glad I did it for Ben. I’m also proud of his son, who came to the funeral and to the interment today. He’s only 8, and he should never have lost his dad.
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Beautiful xx
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Ali7 and FjI, the past couple of days must have been very stressful for you, but you did your sons proud. Sending you big hugs. x
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Thank you, I’ve been very down and tearful today. As one of my son’s said earlier it’s all surreal again.
I still want to tell Ben things, I expect him to call and imagine him walking in.
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I feel terrible today, can’t stop crying and feel desperate to see Rupert. I hate my life now.
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Would give anything, anythjng and everything just to have my boy back. I miss him more than words can say loving him is the easy bit but missing him hurts so much life is so cruel taking our babies xx
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I feel like I don’t know how to go on without him .
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So sorry to hear this, ladies. I have also been crying a lot more the past few days. Maybe it is the finality of Simon’s ashes coming home or maybe it’s the sunshine almost mocking my grief. I can’t see an end to feeling like this. Meanwhile everyone else is just getting on with their everyday routine, oblivious of how lucky they are. All I wanted was a normal life with two children who would grow up healthy and happy, and live normal lives themselves. I just hope and pray Simon is waiting for me somewhere and that I’ll see him again, but I don’t have a strong faith. I don’t understand why this has happened and what it’s all for.
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