…more than I can possibly verbalise…and after 50 years there can be no answer to mu pain…
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@UnityMan yes mental pain soon becomes physical pain doesn’t it . Longing for your person who is lost forever.
Take care x
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Aw … @UnityMan what a lovely pic … its not fair is it ? 
baby steps - she would want you to get stronger and find some happiness out of life because she looks a lovely lady xx
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@Ladysuisei6
Thank you, to me she was the most beautiful lady on the earth, from the moment we first met 31 years ago i was smitten. We were so happy together & had been making so many plans to travel to all the places we promised we’d visit when our children grew up.
She was my whole world and now she’s gone, I’m completely broken knowing that I’ll never see her again, my life will never be the same
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Aw … youre in such early days though and its still very raw for you right now … bless you. Life throws us do many curve balls but i think losing a partner is one of the worst if you ask me !! Take care … keep a journal to write to her … i do it … really helps you know xxx
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Villa boy, That’s beautiful. You feel about your wife just what I feel for my late husband. Like you, the minute I saw him, I fell in love. I was only 15 and he was 21 and engaged, but I just knew I was never going to let him go. I didn’t see him for 3 years (he worked away, but accidentally bumped into him one evening. His engagement had ended a few months before. We went for a drink and hadn’t been apart from that day on, for a total of 57 wonderful years and I miss him so much all the time… You’ll know exactly how I feel.
I don’t know how to carry on either. I suppose we do it for the family.
Take care of yourself. I wish you a peaceful life, full of happy memories and the knowledge that we were loved beyond all imagination.
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My lovely husband
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@VillaBoy22 yes I actually get panicky when I realise I’ll never see my man ever again. It’s the shock isn’t it ?
I look at photos and just think he looks so alive and fit . Then , very suddenly he was just gone - a bit like a magician’s trick only not entertaining in the slightest. Life certainly is a bleak place these days isn’t it x
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Hope youre doing ok honey ? You are sounding bit better even though its still sad for you , for us all. I hope you are feeling a bit stronger. Take care xxx
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@Deb5 thank you . I don’t feel like I will ever fully heal from my loss , sometimes I still can’t believe he’s gone . Making matters worse is my 30 year old son who , for whatever reason, has decided to fall out with me and is being really wicked and unkind . He won’t tell me why . This is really stressing me out . We’ve never fallen out before 
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Hi, I would like to upload a photo, how do I do it please?
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If you go into photo gallery and scroll right back into photos at beginning you will see instructions for uploading your photo … because i couldn’t do it either - they have put it near my photo. X
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No i am same. I find it hard without my husband. Its the being alone i an not good at !! I just hate it ! Need to try and go out more i think but its hard in the winter isnt it ?
Don’t even tell me about kids. Mine are in their 30’s and they have been a nightmare since their father passed away ! They stress me out too !! So i know the feeling … xxx
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Hello @Malc39200,
Are you using your computer or a phone/tablet?
If you’re on a phone or tablet, when writing your message, you’ll see a little button with an arrow at the bottom right. If you click that, you can upload a photo from your phone:
If you’re using your computer, that button will be at the top of the box where you write your message:
I hope this is helpful,
Seaneen
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@Deb5 my son is 30 , keeps threatening to cut contact with me , is refusing to let me see my first grandchild due in March and I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. He tells me I should know , it’s that bad . This is like a nightmare because I genuinely don’t have a clue what I’ve done wrong apart from rely on him a fair bit in the early days after my partner died . I can’t believe how callous my son now is , he’s broken me . Sometimes I feel like ending my life . Because of the way he’s treating me. Everything is so much worse because of this . What happens to our children? Why do they do these things ?
At first he was brilliant.
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That is just like my son too … he was brilliant at start him snd his wife and then after funeral they just got difficult … in fact i have 3 children and the level of sympathy i have had from them is woeful … its really cruel isnt it when we have lost our husband. Only thing that keeps me going is some good friends i have made walking my dog and a good neighbour … and im talking to my sister and mum a bit too its a really sad state of affairs isnt it when our own children cant support us … my kids in their 30’s too btw and my daughter is due her baby in march and i hope i get to see him but shes not talking either . They cant cope with grief that’s what i think … they wanna hide from it and dont care how it has affected us x
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@Deb5 well I’d always be there for my son even if it meant putting my feelings second. He won’t tell me what I’ve done ( even though it’s so bad apparently) . I have relied heavily on him , like phoning him a lot when I was lonely etc but surely it can’t just be this . His bloody mother in law says I’ve “ caused harm “ . Whatever this is I really don’t know but she really shouldn’t be involved! I’m too scared to say anything in case things get worse . I agree that they find the grieving difficult, but they still have their lives . My son used to be so happy , good fun and we got on great . Now he’s unpredictable, moody , unreliable and argumentative. On top of this I want to see the baby - he’s what’s keeping me going . I have to be “ a nice person “ whatever this is, but I’m already a nice person. I don’t do anything horrible to anyone. What a nightmare we both live in x
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Yeh they get influenced by the in laws ! And i was always there for my kids too … i done free chold care and all sorts. Hope u sort it. Just try to stay cool but i know its hard xx
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