Reading your oh so sad feelings upsets me more so I’m signing off as i don’t need this.
Good luck all
Beryl
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I’m the same, conversations I nearly have, the disbelief that it really happened. I woke on 4th January this yeTCar, but a stroke ensured that my beautiful wife didn’t. It is a very lonely furrow we plough for the rest of our lives. I’m lucky to have very supportive friends and neighbours and a very, very supportive family, but they cannot understand how we feel, because it hasn’t happened to them, thank goodness. I hold all members of this involuntary club as fellow travellers and you are always in my thoughts.
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I agree those who have not been through this cannot understand.
I am so glad you have supportive people around you.
Take care,
Rose
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It’s going to be 13 months the day after tomorrow and I still find it hard to believe he has gone tbh. 
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So sad to hear all our thoughts and struggles but I thank you all for sharing as it gives me comfort to know I’m not alone.
It’s hard to try explain to others how we feel and I watch my friends try to understand and support me but can’t be really honest with them as I think they would just find it all too much. And they want to make it better for me - which they can’t.
Fridays were always a great night where we would sit and relax and plan for the weekend - even if there wasn’t much going on. I miss my husband mostly to do nothing with.
Am holding on to the hope that eventually it will get easier and I hope you all do too.
Sending love and hugs to all xxx
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It’s so difficult isn’t it?
I know what you mean about doing nothing with. We pottered about but it was ok as we were together. Now pottering about is not the same. What was everyday, relaxed time being together now seems a meaningless way to fill time.
I suppose being able to live with the loss will partly be accepting that some fulfilment can be achieved from doing those things by ourselves. This time ‘by ourselves’ is completely different to doing things by ourselves as part of a couple, it is truly by ourselves.
Having retired and being careful during and after Covid being together as a couple was our everyday norm.
Also, after nearly 50 years together, to now be an individual doing things for myself, taking decisions by myself and for just me is totally foreign to me. I still have ‘being part of a couple’ mentality. That cannot be switched off very quickly.
There are so many changes to our lives that we have to address. How we think about our everyday lives just being one.
Sending love and understanding to everyone,
Rose xx
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This evening I wenť to a music concert on my own. It was a Genesys tribute hand, a group my husband loved. Together we have seen this band many times
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I dont know what happened to my last post. Sorry!
Ive been out tonight to a tribute band concert for Genesys. My husband was such a fan, and we have seen this group loads of times. He loved Genesys. The concert was so cathartic. It was dark in the venue and I let the tears flow on his favourite tracks. It was a great way to release all that pent up emotion, and no one could see in the dark.
I loved the concert, Jim was with me, and I did I feel a little lighter. He will never leave me, life will never be the same, but there is a way forward - you just have to find it.
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Well done for taking the step to go to a concert on your own. I am not quite there yet but hope to be strong enough to go to things on my own in the future x
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@paeony I think that is such an amazing thing you have done!
I’m so glad you enjoyed the concert and that Jim was with you.
I really admire you.
Love,
Rose x
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Thinking of you.
Sending a big hug,
Rose x
Thinking of you all
Hope your weekend’s are as good as can be
Take care
Big hugs
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Well done for attending the concert on yourown .That must have been such a difficult decision initially. This is week 19 now since I lost G and it was his birthday last thursday . No birthday cards on display was heartbreaking It was like a message telling me he really was gone. But I know he’s here with me. He has to be. I still hope its all a bad dream and I’ll wake up to see him fast asleep beside me. My heart goes out to all of you.
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Sending a very big hug xx
They say that the first of everything is the worst. A birthday is a huge event. Well done getting through it.
Sending you a huge hug.
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Paeony you were very brave to go to the concert on your own, i would fond that hard even when my David was still alive. I am so glad it helped you. It is strange but the things that make us cry and even sadder seem to help us . The tears must be healing our broken hearts bit by bit.
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Tonight I have booked myself another ticket. End of August i’m going to Fleetwood Bac. No prizes for guessing whose music they play! They are doing the Rumours album on Friday night, but that was sold out, so I’m doing Tango in the Night on the Saturday. We always say weekends are dreadful, so maybe this one will be OK 
Dont suppose anyone has ever seen them?
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Not seen them but me and David loved going to see tribute bands, and the real ones too. The ELO experience was fab, the Beatles, we saw Barrry Manilow last year on his final UK tour, saw Leo Sayer he was brilliant. You will love it singing along , it will be a great night 
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youre so brave to go to concerts alone, i went to church this morning, and tgey were all talking about going on holiday then adked if i was going away in holiday. Did tge udual brave face and replied nothing planned. How can i go on holiday alone? No one to share things with, I’d be swapping one lonely place for another, just a different 4 walls, dont think ill ever have another holiday. so today has ended as a bad day of me crying. Its 17 weeks since David left and I’m really not coping well, i miss him so much.
i dont see a way of going on holiday without him.
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