Have a good weekend everyone. Hope you can find something nice - Olympics, sunshine, reading a book, listening to music - that helps you feel better. X
Weāve been watching the gymnastics! They I went outside and pulled up some weeds except the garden wheelie bin is full!
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Oromotphe is that the shots ? I have that also but not felt the urge to use them. Gabbenpentin which is for flamatory pain, paracetamol. Hospital is looking after you should see what Iām taking first thing. Iām on a lot of medication. Itās probably masking my back. Hospitals are clever like that, magic stuff. Itās almost like a goody bag but full of meds, I never been on so many. Iām catching up with mum.
Thank? You, just got back from Tescos bought myself a birthday cake, Pork Pie which I love and ham, crisp and small loaf. No it wonāt be the samenot without mum. Iām not sure how I will feel about it to be honest. Iām doing the same stuff as she was still alive. Itās getting harder to get off this bed. Maybe Iām doing far too much ? I got 7 fractures in my back, Iām hoping it doesnāt get any worse. Iām in trouble if it does. Maybe a couple of days of rest ?
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Oramorphe is liquid morphine, it just gives you a bit extra cover in between your doses of morphine tablets. The pain could be your body telling you that you are doing too much
Just
Think you are doing too much. Rest up. Happy Birthday
Xx
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Happy birthday 
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Happy Birthday 
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Thank You All, Iām 56 now! had a few moments today grief wise. I like being on my own, but I do feel a little loss in the flat. I walk from room to room. I got sort some washing out in a bit and put another bag of mumās clothes in the car. I went into town earlier and bought few bits from Tescos and a Switch a game. Switch is still in the Amazon box. I opened my card from my aunty in Australia, mumās 2nd oldest sister. I might write again it takes so long to get a reply and she getting on. 1 card and 4 notifications on FB. Think I be glad when itās all over!
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Hiya
Bet it was nice to get a real card from your Aunty. Sadly all of mine have gone. Mum outlived all 12 of them. I donāt keep any cards but as I said earlier in the thread I found the last one Mum wrote herself to me by chance when I was looking for something else. I cannot bear to look at pics of my mum yet except one that I have on the mantlepiece. In it she looks happy and I know she is wherever she is. I just get that feeling. I also get the feeling that she wants to shake me and tell me to get in with my life. I will ,in time, I tell her back.
You take it easy. It is your Birthday.
Xx
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Life weird no one including us knows where it will take us. Just except it, what will be will be. Just hope I see mum again one day, like everyone else here,! they deserve that, as a lot of people are suffering on these forums. No one deserves to feel like they do.
My sister and I havenāt had a good day in worked, I cracked as I couldnāt take anymore. One person said to my sister that they thought we were over it by now. Weāre getting bullied by someone in our team which is making the grief of losing mum even harder to deal with.
Just patch the washing and play your Switch game instead, no one should have to do washing on their birthday
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Sorry itās been difficult today but hope youāve got through it without too much grief. Keep on keeping on, and all the best.
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Sorry, what an awful thing to say to you. When are you ever over the loss of your mum. None of us will ever be over it, but hopefully can live peacefully with it eventually. The loss is always there. I feel I keep it close to the front of my mind at all times, just so it canāt completely come up and ambush me if I forgot for a moment. Some people are so brutal with their unkindness. Hope youāve had a chance to unwind a little now.
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I know that feeling, when you feel vulnerable you will want the closest person around you or your mum. I feel that way when dealing with Myeloma. I got very emotional in hospital and still do at home. You shouldnāt have that at work, are you part of a union ?
Grief does creep up on you, doesnāt it. I wonder if Malcolm can get some support ? Thereās not enough support now for grief. I would like to see support groups set up. I attended my first group meeting with Myeloma. We do need to be there for 1 and another. I told my mum she was in a better place and looking at these riots just confirms my thinking.
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I just donāt understand how people can be so cruel knowing we have lost our mum. So many people have turned away from us since we went back to work, itās down to this one particular woman. Then the last few weeks we have had a guy who works on the same dept as us talk about us behind our backs. Today someone told us while we were off the last few days, he told her we are lazy and we think we are so hard done by. I broke down and spoke to a manager who has told us to start later so we donāt have to deal with him first thing tomorrow then we will have to talk to our dept manager. So we now have two people who are going about the store turning people against us. One woman who lost her husband the same week we lost mum even brushed us off today and sheās always looked out for us. I suffered with depression after we lost dad and I ended up hating my life and not seeing the point of it, Iām scared Iām going to end up back there again. Weāve asked to move to other depts so we just have to see what tomorrow brings. Iām a fiery woman like my mum but I just donāt have it in me right now.
Itās scary all the rioting and the reason they are using to justify their behaviour is shocking. This is the danger these days of social media, someone only needs to sew a seed of doubt online and it escalates.
Enough of my moaning, I hope everyone is doing ok @Magsclar did you go to the gym?! And @Keith68 are you in a cake coma yet?
Not quite I find here quite a normal place with normal people. I post just to chat really, we all live different lifeās but share 1 thing in common. I never thought or saw all this happening to me. I didnāt know if being diagnosed with Myeloma is a curse or a gift. I still donāt know, all of this has put me on a path I never thought of. I donāt like the world today, itās not my world. I feel thereās no place for me in todayās world. I donāt know if Iām depressed or not. No one tells you much these days. Sorry about your work and how you are being treated. They should show you some compassion, care and kindness. We all act differently, I been told I need to live my life by my aunty. 2bd sister to mum but itās not that easy and with Myeloma itās made it worse for me.
Thereās time yet to live your life once you come out the other side of your treatment. I think your aunty is running ahead a bit, just got to get your body sorted out first so you donāt end up with more broken bones. Have they said how long your treatment will go on for?
You really shouldnt have to move, but I can understand why you want to. I find people are often so unthinking. No, @Malcolm2, no gym yet! Lol, too hot. Thereās always a good excuse!. To be fair we were going once or twice a week plus badminton with my son, but all our normality seems to have changed since we lost mum and weāre all out of kilter.
@Keith68 you are working so hard to get things done and overcome your illness, you should realise how much youāre already doing. @Malcolm2 did you have another job application deadline today?