I am feeling very similar to you. I lost my Mum suddenly almost 16 months ago. I feel very sad and empty. At the weekend I also felt really anxious and worried over nothing. At work I get on and no one would really know how sad I feel and I also feel like I can’t tell anyone. I have struggled loosing my mum and so I can imagine losing your husband is devastating and not something you can just move on from. I am not sure I can offer advice but wanted to say that what you wrote just sounded like how I feel and i hope it helps you realise it’s probably very normal. I am so sorry you lost your husband it must be so hard for you xx
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So sorry for u ive just lost mine he was 68 im 56 i cant bear this. I just dont want go back to work meet anyone etc its just hell. Where r u in the country im in somerset. Nicole
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Hi im in Lincolnshire
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Hi i,m east Yorkshire
Hello Nei
Yes I feel exactly like you and struggle at trying to get over things. I understand everybody doesn’t want to talk about my husband all the time and don’t talk so much unless it’s somebody like myself. He is constantly in my head and can’t believe after 16months still feel so lost and it hurts. Don’t beat yourself up it’s fine don’t stop talking about him at all. Angela
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Im west yorkshire, bordering with north Yorkshire 
xx
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I,m in east Yorkshire bordering Lincolnshire and North Yorkshire
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Hi Nel You are a brave confident woman. You are also going through a terrible time. Dont beat yourself up. We know that at the moment 1 good day can be followed by a lot of bad ones. You are the person who inspires me to get through. Try to breathe, centre & if all else fails go & have a good cry. Xxxxxx
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Bless you darling. I lost myvhusband to metastatic prostate cancer on 24th feb this year and I absolutely understand and feel everything you are going through. Im sick of people telling me to be strong when its the last thing im feeling most of the time. Evenings, waking up every morning and weekends are the worse, loneliest times. The feeling of emptiness, not belonging, not knowing who I am anymore, how to start a new life without him is overwhelming and like you, the anxiety adds to the struggle. My hands literally shake. There is no time limit to grief lovely. Its only been a few weeks for me but 2 years for you is still very early days so dont feel you cant share your grief and sadness with others. When you feel close to tears, dont be afraid to cry. Your grief, like mine, is a reaction to how much we loved and will always love our husbands. I try to tell myself that grief is a small price to pay for the love we shared but actually, it isnt and underestimating our grief and emotions is detrimental to our mental health and wellbeing. Our lives have changed forever. It doesnt mean it wont be good again. We just have to try to accept that the future just wont be the same without our husband. Its a huge life change. Please take time to be kind and gentle to yourself. Sending love and healing thoughts during this difficult time xx
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I can sympathise with you. I lost my gorgeous fantastic wife sue to pancreatic cancer which had spread to her lungs and liver on the first of February this year.yesterday was the first birthday of Sue’s without sue .i feel so lost especially mornings evenings anytime of the day. But it hit me yesterday when we got home .my steplad dave and aderlaide my daughter were with me. My daughter lives with me but i miss the intimacy and cuddling up watching tv and listening to music with sue xx
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Well said … beautiful words xx
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You will do martyn … its rubbish isnt it 
i dunno when our lives will get better but hopefully they will one day … i sort of still like thinking about my husband still … i loved him so much ! Its the unfairness of it isnt it ? If i didnt want him to go and he didnt want to go then why did he ? I still havent got an answer to that question guess in the end it was their bodies not their spirit that gave up … so tough on us though and my heart goes out to every one of us trying to get by as best we can xx 
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Thankyou deb5.just feels like going through the montions sometimes but made a promise to sue that I will carry on being the person she made me into and I will not break my promise. The encouragement sue gave me when i became a right below knee amputee in December 2019 is the thing that makes me carry on as well xx
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Aw bless you martyn. Least you got your daughter with you. Im happy that you got someone to care for you - your wife would’ve been happy about that too xx
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Thank you xx
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Bless you Martyn. Its so difficult to process isnt it. Even when you know it coming. My husband had metastatic prostate cancer and was in hospital for the last two month’s of his life haven been given just weeks to live. He passed in February and im dreading what would have been his birthday in May sobi can truly relate to how difficult your lovely wifes birthday must have been for you yesterday. Holding on and cherishing the wonderful memories will hopefully offer you some comfort during the really difficult moments when the grief overwhelms you. Mornings, evenings and weekends can be especially hard. Working is a small distraction during the week but as you say, the intimacy of cuddles and talking, holding hands can leave us feeling isolated and lost. I really feel your pain. You were both so lucky to have found and loved each other. Your lovely wife will always be with you in spirit and in your heart. One moment at a time, one day at a time. Be kind to yourself xx
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Thank you .i,m retired due to ill health .diabetic on insulin and heart disease .but learning to slow down a lot more now
Plus Teddy n George are a godsend especially now cuddling up on the sofa with me and my daughter
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I fully cocur with your feelings as being exactly the same as mine. I lost my wife of 50 years 7 months ago and coments that you made about feeling lost in life and how people see you resound exactly the same with myself. I feel life is like a wave, sometimes you are riding on the crest and the next moment you have have slid down to the bottom. Also, if im by myself, weekends are also the worse. All I hope that time and perserverence will be a healer in this situation. Hope it will be the same for yourself and also hope to will find peace and acceptance as you move though your life .
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@Martyn2 so sorry for your loss Martyn. She looks like a beautiful kind woman. I too agree that weekends are the worst. You will be in my prayers x
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Thank you nel.sue was and still is the best thing to ever happen to me .kept me going especially when I lost my right leg below the knee in December 2019 .had something called charcots and the ankle had collapsed
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