Manb
Yes this is the drop off place to share how things are affecting you, you’ll get real helpful advice from others who have been there.
Take care 
2 Likes
Hi everyone my husband has been gone 4 months now and it’s the mornings and evenings I suffer the most
I have my grandson who is 24 here till tomorrow initially all family were around but that’s stopped now but I do understand they all work and it’s lovely to see them when I can
The horrible bit I’m stuck in is thoughts of me dying and how that will happen silly I know but scary
My love to everyone x
1 Like
It’s been 5 months since losing my husband. Your feelings exactly mirror mine, and no doubt many others on here. I’m also very anxious all the time which is so unlike me. Reality has now set in whereas I think we are in denial for the first few months. We are not alone thank goodness, and, apparently what we are feeling is normal. Always someone here to speak to thank goodness. Sending hugs xx
2 Likes
It’s just plain loneliness that I feel as I’ve really no direction without her being here and doing stuff together.
What do we fill our day up with? Shopping, cleaning, riding out to where? , and then coming back to an empty home.
So easy to stay in bed too long, and then waste the day reminiscing about our loss and what I could’ve done differently while she was here.
If she had the time again I’d do things differently, love more, talk more, be kinder, more understanding but there is no returning and that is is hard to accept
2 Likes
My thoughts exactly no fun going out for coffee and cake I feel everyone’s looking at me
No more theatre trips etc
1 Like
I’m currently parked up overlooking our local moor ( Dartmoor) for a coffee and cake. This is what we’d do together and oh how I wish while it’s so quiet we’d talked more, back when she was pre dementia . So many opportunities over the years missed to say I love you, talk deeper about things, get closer.
30 years of ordinariness, which was accepted , but I wish now we’d talked more. She lost the power of speaking because of the dementia. So cruel.
1 Like
@Peter11
I feel for you love. Talk to her now and imagine what she’d say back to you. I do with my partner. It’s a little bit of comfort. Xx
1 Like
Ooh yes I wished I’d talked to my husband more and feel guilty for telling him to pull himself together and try and get about a bit more but sure he knows I didn’t realise how ill he was
I need to get out to have tea and cake as we always enjoyed that together
I not been too good today feeling but low as no one’s been here and can’t be bothered attitude take care all of you
It’s the loneliness that’s eating away at me. Today is about the worst I’ve had, just want to curl up and sleep for a long time, wake up and this has been a nightmare. My husband died before Christmas, I miss him so much, not all times were good, but all that’s in my head today are the awful times, I’m trying to get these out of my mind but can’t. So sorry for going on like this. Sending love to all.
3 Likes
i was reading my post from 10 days ago,wow,i have had a much better week,sun shine,setting myself decorating tasks,which has been good therapy,but this evening my old knees/hips are creaking from the step ladder! im going out to lunch tomorrow,im out a couple of times next week with friends for lunch,its all or nothing,but i dont say no,or i may not get asked again! its 5 months now,have a turned a corner? best not think about it too much,because there is sure to be a nose dive for no apparent reason. hope everybody else doing ok nw the sun is out x
Yes the loneliness is horrible and I keep thinkin of when i had words with him I could of been more sympathetic
I seeing my son tomorrow looking forward to that
@Pickle1 i feel like that too no point going out and i look at the scenery here but like you feel like I’m the focus of peoples attention sitting alone in a beautiful place here my linda not beside me its just such a horrid feeling not being able to just look at her and see that smile and her beautiful eyes looking back at me the way she did that look of love and hope contentment being in her as she called it paradise but has now become my nightmare sending love to all 
Martin 
2 Likes
This week I am determined to go out for a coffee and cake and sit by sea or something
Last weds was not a good day but rest of the week kept busy but tiday have had waves of tests but I know it’s weekend and not good time for me
Take care
@Pickle1
Hiya
I find it very hard at weekends. I could just hide away. Last night I went up to our local club. The turn was on so I didn’t have to make much conversation. But then when I dropped off friends it was the coming home to the empty house again. This morning got up feeling down. I’m trying to think positively the sun’s out. But honestly I wish it was raining and dark then I could sit wrapped up and not have to see anyone. X
2 Likes
I feel just like you. I’m out this evening to local club - luckily have a friend who will pick me up & bring me home as I don’t have transport, but the thought of returning to a silent empty house is just horrible.
@Abbiesnan
I know it’s awful. When I’m out I leave the tv on so there’s some sound. I shout out see you later love and hello I’m here when I’m back. Some days are worst than others. Last night was a bad one. It didn’t help someone telling me that I shouldn’t really be having these wobbles anymore because I should be getting used to doing it now!!! I had to walk away. So I suppose that didn’t help at all. Xx
1 Like
I’m feeling so terrible again today, been crying since about seven last night, got a few hours sleep but back to square one. Accept invitation if you’re able to. I would like to have the chance. I’ve only cried once since my Husband died, I’m not one to cry, now I can’t stop and find it difficult to eat.
1 Like
I was also told a few days ago by someone I don’t know well that it must be better now, they’ve no idea, have they. I don’t know why but it’s getting worse.
@Patsy219
Love take a few deep breaths. You will feel awful if you’ve been crying all that time. Perhaps it’s all come together as you said you haven’t really cried.
I used to be like that but now if I can’t find a pen I’m reduced to a sobbing wreck. Stand on your doorstep and breathe in the air. Make a drink even a soup at least you’ll be getting something. We’re all here for you. I’ve cried this morning and still feel there’s more to come. I just force myself to do something. Grief is an evil thing. Xx
2 Likes
@Patsy219
Ignore what people say. You’re right they have no idea. One day they might have to go through this. Some people try and mean well but end up making it worse. You grieve in your own time when you want to. Xx
1 Like