Yes I feel the same luckily I managed all financial affairs so have sorted all this all accounts were in joint names and was easy to transfer into my name
Loneliness is the most horrible feeling everything I do just for me
I make sure I cook because days before my husband died he said ,… you make sure you eat ! So I’ve got a slow cooker and some days put meat etc in there and ready for teatime I cook for two still and have spare one tomorrow
And there’s nothing that can be done to make the loneliness less.
I have moments when I’m almost ok then it hits me that I’m on my own. And after 30 years marriage how could it be any different? All I’ll ever do now will be on my own because I just can’t fill the space with anyone else just for company . It would be wrong
And all this frightens me.
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Luckily I too was able to sort out the financial side of things having always done it (my husband would not have known where to start!) it’s hard living on a reduced income, but not impossible. It’s the loneliness that I find the hardest too, even when I am with friends or family I still feel so alone.
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Yes I feel programmed I think the word is no one except me here loads to do can’t be bothered but I’m determined I’m gonna get there my husband would not of wanted me to mope about
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@To All
You know at the moment I feel that the only thing keeping me going is knowing that my partner had told alot of people to make sure I lived my life for him as well. I know he’d hate to see me like this and I know he’s willing me on. I’m trying I’m even fed up of myself!! What to do?x
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I think all our partners/husbands/wives would want us to enjoy the rest of our lives. I know if I’d gone first I would have wanted my wife to be happy. It’s natural when you love somebody. However, even knowing that probably doesn’t help because you’re grieving the loss. It will probably be some comfort when you find you are ready to move on. I always think that a big step towards that is when memories and photos make you smile rather than cry.
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hi all,the last 2 days i have been overwhelmed with anxiety issues,ive been widowed for 5 months,and struggled,as we all have with the tears/lonliness. but never have i experienced this feeling,the slightest issues are major events,my brain is in overdrive,poor sleep,making lists… all compounded by upcoming events,im selling our caravan,big emotional wrench,this should happen on 2nd april,in the meantime friends are taking me to lanzarote for 2 weeks on the 13th,i think i want to go,im sure the change of scenery,good friends,sunshinewill be just the ticket,plus no"devices"so im not cnstantly checking things. my ancient mobile will be checked daily for anything from my son . phew…always feel better after off loading! cheers all x
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You enjoy your holiday and yr family joe CNN lovely
I agree, go on holiday with your friends, I’m sure it’ll do you good. I think if I could have a chance to have a break it might help me, just being invited out for a coffee would be lovely. Sorry another bad day feeling sorry for myself, loneliness is a terrible thing.
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Go on your holiday and enjoy it. I understand your anxiety, I am exactly the same, I wake up anxious about what might happen even before it happens! everything seems to be going wrong since my husband died 5 months ago so everything becomes a major worry. You will be able to relax on your holiday which is what you need.
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It’s still early days for me (end Jan) but I’m starting to feel more and more anxious. tearful and alone. My sons have been great but everything I do is difficult because I’m missing my wife so much as everything I did I did with her.
Seeing older couples together make me tearful and jealous. Going on trips in the car and holidays will never be the same again. Sorry, I’m just full of self pity today.
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Don’t worry about a self pity day - we all have them! I certainly do, and lots of them.
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@manb
Go on your holidays. When you feeling ABIT overwhelmed just take time out. I’m sure everyone will understand. I’m due to go in may. I’m having palpations thinking about it although a couple of months away.
As for everyone else we’re all gonna have our down days mine was Sunday and Monday. But remember we are all on here to help each other. So moan away somebody will always answer you. X
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thank youx
Thank you for this.
Hi there @Numb1
I get what you are saying as I often experience the same feelings. I wish I had words of comfort that would make a difference to you but words are inadequate mostly given the immense heartbreak you are feeling. A virtual arm round your shoulders and understanding.
Seeing couples hurts. There were a couple at my local beach trying to catch fish which seemed a together hobby. I felt, “you know what, one of you will feel as I do today”. I envied their companionship.
I desperately want to feel better, but part of me doesn’t want to lose the hurt, as it represents my connection to my Bridget and all I’ve lost. I go places we went to but it’s not the same. How can it be? No chats, no banter, driving alone, conversations gone. I was alone anyway as Bridget had dementia and became a stranger.
Please keep posting as I’m here for what it’s worth. Peter.
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