Two weeks of widowhood.

Well! Yes I was asleep but woke around 2.30 as normal and read them all before going back to sleep around 4.00. Then woke to the music from The Proclaimers on Alexa at 8.00. You all seem to have had a great time last night, and what totally lovely photos! It was as lovely a time for me reading all the messages as you seem to have had telling your tales. You already know how our romance started. The lead up to that ‘date’ (which was more like me needing someone to come with me, so I wasn’t on my own, at the time of asking) is another story, which I’ll maybe share at another time.

We weren’t married in 1985, when we bought the new house together, with 8 living in a two bedroom house. Her father assumed I’d sleep in one room with the boys, Mary would share with the girls, and he and her mother would sleep on the sofas in what is now our dining room. Bad idea! Never assume where Mary is concerned! She put her foot down on that. “No Dad, you’re sleeping in with the boys, Mum is sleeping in with the girls, and Nigel and I are sharing the back bedroom”! Despite their strong Catholic faith, he didn’t really have a choice in the matter - Mary saw to that. As an only child, Mary could pretty much always get her dad, and mum, to do what she wanted. And I could do no wrong in their eyes - I’d been there to support Mary after the breakdown of her marriage, and had accepted both her mum and dad into my family, and to a house in which they now owned a half share, never having owned a property previously. We all slept on the mattresses for our beds which were on top of the new flat pack bedroom furniture we’d bought for everyone, for when the extension was finished. 10 months like that and not a single argument between any of us, kids included. We’d all taken a huge leap of faith getting together in one house. But it worked!

It took nearly 40 years for me to actually realise how much of this Mary and I had arranged, without seeming to ask the others about it all. I used the wake to say thank you to all the kids, for having just accepted things back then without question. I guess Mary did talk about it with her kids and parents, but my boys were still very young, and just needed some happiness back in their lives. I still see their sad eyes in photos taken after their mum had left us.

Enough! I’ll be crying soon! I’ll have another read through later in case I’ve missed anything.

Anyway, I hope you all had a good night, and that you have good days today. Plumbing starts this morning with diagnosing the source of the leak! That’s after fresh croissants and choc au pain and coffee!

I’m so pleased you all felt you could share memories of your weddings, and show more recent photos too. Your husbands all look like wonderful men, and I really think we’d have all got on well together. And yes, it was really nice to read all the fun things that happened, and to enjoy a bit of fun and laughter together too.

Much love to all of you. Nigel xxx

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match.com worked for my friend. Every Sunday night we would be on the phone looking at the prospects and there were some real toads along the way. We had some howling laughs. But, eventually, she met a great guy and they are happily together. I know 2 young couples that met there and are married.

Another good night of restful sleep. The Beast wakes me in the morning which is the sweetest way to start the day - fluffy dog snuggles.

Tax info day. Why am I so scared of this? Probably because the IRS is difficult and treats everyone like a criminal. Quick with penalties and not a shred of leaway.

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Good morning Peaches. They’re great photos! Glad you had a good night’s sleep. Mine was as good as it gets in this cold time here. At least I was actually warm with extra blankets last night.

I’ve been investigating the shower leak for nearly five hours now, and can’t find anywhere it leaks. That’s so frustrating, as unless I can find it I can’t really reinstall the toilet itself, which also includes the waste pipe from the shower! Luckily that’s not the only toilet in the house. I think I’ll now have to undo the trap, and refit that, then drill a hole through the wall below the shower tray, and insert an endoscope to record what is happening whilst I have a shower. The problem is that the trap is not easily accessible due to height restrictions in the room itself, meaning the shower is as low as it can be, over a concrete floor. That’s for tomorrow now.

It’ll soon be time to cook dinner as I’m currently 8 hours ahead of you. (The UK is 7 hours ahead). After last night’s meal from the freezer, I’m doing tonight’s from scratch. Herb crusted Cod. Plus Chorizo and paprika roasted baby potatoes and mixed veg, with a Saffron Aioli sauce. Then fruit salad with cream followed by cheese and biscuits (sorry - crackers) and coffee to finish. I wish I’d bought a Jim Beam Kentucky Bourbon on the ferry!

I’ve been invited to my first lunch, other than with family! My next door neighbour has invited me to join them for Sunday lunch, which is really nice, so I’ll have to find a nice wine to take - not that that is hard here - so many good wines for not much cost! Still no rich widows though! :rofl:

I hope you have a good day, and manage your tax stuff without too much agro.

With love, Nigel xxx

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For jury duty you can always use the old chestnut. Sorry what was that you said i’m a bit hard of hearing.

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Peaches, I love the pictures, I bet you have great memories of that trip.
I know how you feel about the tax people, I am scared to open my emails this week, it could be news about Turkey. Dreading it in case it goes against me, I really need this to work in my favour. The sale could be held up as well if probate is delayed.
I’ve done my bit for today, another 5 bags of stuff to the dump. Son in law came with my carpet and took a few tools from man cave with him. While he was taking a bolt off a table to get this massive vice, a load of tools fell off a shelf beside me, I wonder if that was my husband not approving what I was doing. We did laugh about it. Another few things gone. I even managed to find space on floor and swept up some sawdust, first time I’ve managed that.
It’s great that the days are getting lighter here, nearly 5pm and still light. Just need some heat.
I was about to come off Match.com as there were too many toads on it, then I thought I will just chat and not date. When my husband asked me out, I thought we live too far apart from each other, I will meet him half way and see how it goes. It was all done correctly, he made sure it was in a public place and that I felt safe which was reassuring compared to the last two I had went out with. The rest is history, 12 happy years. Xxx

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Nigel, your leak sounds a lot worse than my sink leak, I checked it today again and it’s still ok. Glad you have two toilets, I had to stay with my daughter when I had no toilet.
I put a grout reviver around my small tiles in the kitchen today, what a difference it made. I am going to re silicon around the shower tomorrow, I found a tool that takes it off, well my son-in-law told me what it was, as I was about to bin it, I always look at things like that when I am buying property, nothing worse than dark silicon. Piping bag will be working again lol.
I really am getting there with my to do list, I’m going to be so impatient if I am waiting months on the Scottish lawyers to get the Estate sorted. I’m thinking it would be lovely to move in the summer months.
Do you have a big to do list in France? Silly question, you probably have. I panicked at the beginning of my list, there was so much to do, I still have, but I can see it happening now.
I put my lovely dress on Vinted today, I hope it sells, I won’t ever wear it again.
Your dinner sounds lovely. I’m have a Tesco Finest Ready meal, ok it’s better than the toast I had yesterday, I am making a large pot of chilli tomorrow so that will do quite a few dinners.
That’s so nice of your neighbours inviting you round, I hope you have a lovely time with them. Xxx

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Well Peaches if you understood all that was said there about the shower & toilet, I take my hat off to you! I hadn’t a clue Nigel, I wish good luck with it though xxx
I didn’t sleep so good cause for the first time ever I had a dream with my husband in it, we had just moved to our 2nd home in 1979 with our baby daughter then 6 mths old, and instead of sorting out & decorating our home he was running around helping the new neighbours, while I was stressed to max, that did not happen in real life so what that means I have no idea lol !
But at least now I can say he was in my dream xx

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Basically Georgi, I’ve got a leak I can’t find and it’s hard to fix! :rofl: :smiling_face_with_three_hearts:

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Still not much light at that time up here Lizzy, Im willing the light nights here, at least if your bored you can go out a walk but not keen to do it in the dark, I did do it when we first moved here 10 yrs ago but you feel more vulnerable the older you get, I’m scared at my own shadow these days, a mix of age and not having a man in the house now, even my cat is female xxx

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Nigel your a comedian :joy::joy:

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So they tell me at home - often - but normally ‘dad’ jokes!

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They would be correct xx

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I wish I could find a picture of my aunt in her wedding dress because it’s very similar to yours

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Sorry bout that Lizzy its you not Peaches, in case you didn’t know that :crazy_face::face_with_peeking_eye:

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Awe how cute is that photo, gorgeous xxx

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Oh such a lovely picture KtG - they look so sweet!

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This is one of my favourite recent photos of me and Mary when we were with family in Val Thorens in France, in 2019. Despite enjoying my stay here, I really miss her tonight as she loved the cod dish I’m doing! She was always self conscious about her left cheek after suffering a streptococcal infection in 2009 - which she very nearly died from. She would often cover her cheek with her left hand. .

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Georgi, just getting dark here just now, but even that extra hour is good. Someone coming at 6.30 for something out the man cave, doing this sale myself, son in law is working, I feel a bit vulnerable doing this myself. I will let my daughter know when they are here then call her after they have been. It’s silly really, I wouldn’t walk about on my own either, too quiet where I live. My house is getting emptier by the minute. I will open the garage door in half an hour, just hope there are two of them, it’s amazing the people that come on their own when it’s a two man job to lift it. It’s not heavy but would be awkward.
I still haven’t had a dream yet, I thought I might have done last night when we were all chatting about our weddings last night. I did sleep a bit better though. Maybe one day,
Xxx

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Lovely photo of you both, happy & smiling xxx

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