Nigel at the moment he’s doing well and being phased back into work over a 6 wk period, he’s really shattered after even just a half day but thats understandable he has come through a lot and been off over a year, his mum is shattered too cause shes having to drive him back and forth because he’s not allowed to drive after the one seizure he had last oct I think it was, which was due to the scarring on the brain after the op ! His dad has been in in Brazil for work this last 6/7 wks so they will probably decide the plan of whats going to happen next, thing is to go to America again is very expensive, and any rehab if there were issues like the stroke last time and rehab is excellent there but costs an arm and a leg per day pardon the pun!
Or do they trust Edinburgh to do it when they really don’t have the experience with these things like Dr Stark in Miami, after all nobody in UK would operate on him the first time round thats why they did a go fund me page then!
Will let you know what they all decide xxx
PS Edinburgh thot this new thing was an AVM too but apparently its not, similar but not an AVM and they suggested leaving it a yr and doing another angiogram then, whereas Dr Stark said no way it has to be dealt with whether here or in Miami has it is a high risk to bleed !
That sounds a lovely thing Phil668 thats what I would have done if my husband had chosen cremation, I have a foto of my husband on my bedside table I kiss it goodnight but funny enough I say good morning to him in the spare bedroom cause thats where he died in a hospital bed, when I open the curtains I say good morning to him xxx
We all have our own ways of doing things, its definitely not a one size fits all for sure, its how we all try and get through this as best we can xxx
Goodnight Debsie xxx
Yes Flints its a very cruel world, and that must’ve been a terrible shock for you finding him like that xx
It was different for me my husband had cancer and midway through the first round of chemo the scan showed it had spread further to his chest and abdomen so no more they could do, he was diagnosed in Dec 22 just 2 wks before xmas and died on 1/5/23, but we knew it was coming unlike yourself and others on here, but it’s devastating whatever way it happens, also no difference if you’ve been together a short time or a lifetime as we were(47 yrs married ) it is still devastating xxx
Chezza I am so sorry you lost your husband, its the worst thing I believe most of us can say thats ever happened to us, but you have joined the best group of people here, we all help one another get through this, there is lots of advice on just about anything from them as well so any questions whether its finances, decorating, gardening, selling stuff online, you would be amazed at the variety! But most of all its a friendship with people who really do understand what you are going through xxx
Its sad you have had to join this group but in my opinion you have joined the perfect group to support you through this grief journey we are all on xxx
Morning everyone,
Arrived safely, grandson chatted to me the whole flight lol, didn’t have time to have a quiet think about what was I was about to do.
We arrived at hotel about 2am, took a while to get to sleep, next thing I knew my alarm was going off. First time I’ve slept through for months. But in saying that we are 2 hours ahead of you so it’s only 6am and I’ve had 4 hours sleep. The other two have fell fast asleep again but I better stay wakened. My lawyer tried to call me yesterday but forgot my phone was off, he left a voice msg which I noticed when putting my phone into airplane mode. He is picking us up at 11am and was wishing us a good flight. . Phew! I always think the worse. With three of us needing a shower I guess I better be the first one to get up. If they go without their breakfast it will be disastrous, 
.
I now know what Ktg means about catching up with all our chatting, we are a chatty family.
Welcome Chezza, I’m so glad you have decided to join us, you won’t be lonely on here, but so sorry for your loss, it’s not easy.
Hope Peaches ok, noticed she hasn’t been on.
Everyone has been very busy, I missed you all yesterday. Thanks for thinking about me, I’m so glad I have Mr Chatterbox with me, I could do this without them. Dreading this morning, I honestly don’t know how I will cope but I will have to.
Have to move now, I don’t want to be late. This hotel is massive and the walk to get past the gatehouse is long. My lawyer is meeting us there. Not sure what the weather is like yet. Curtains are heavy so it’s quite dark in room.
I will let you know how it goes when I get back.
Have a lovely day xxx😘
Georgi I’m glad he’s doing ok at present, and he does need time to get back into work after so long off. It’s so difficult not being able to drive. I just had a one month requirement not to drive after my TIA and even that was bad enough. It made things hard for Mary and she had to do all I would have done, so I really understand how tiring that makes it for others - and I wasn’t even working so could do some things she would have done at home (when she let me!)
What a difficult decision to have to make about where to be treated - especially with the costs involved in the US. I truly hope thay can come to the right decision and raise the funds if that is the US.
The added pressure must make things doubly difficult for you and them all.
My very best wishes to you all. Nigel xxxx
Lizzy - lovely to hear from you today. I really hope everything goes smoothly and that it’s easier than you think. Remember flowers and candles breathing!
We’ll be thinking of you.
Nigel xxxx
Hi Cheeza, welcome to this slightly dysfunctional group of grieving widows and widowers. I am so sorry that you husband died and at such a young age. I know it is horrifying for you. Nothing makes sense, everything is surreal and well, we live in a fog of confusion and a million dreadful emotions shooting at us every day. It is hard to make it day by day.
I live hour by hour still after 6 months. It is the only way I can function. I also care about things less. I pay the bills, I eat and I keep The Beast alive. Everything else is “whatever”. Yes, depression, anxiety, stress, sleepless, no short term memory, walking in circles - still going through all of it. But, less often.
My guests have arrived. They thought they would arrive tomorrow, but their plans changed. They are asleep now. Long drive, long day, delicious meal, and a few glasses of champagne. Should be a good sleep. Remember the hostess with the mostess? I am the hostess with the leastess. Good thing they are dog people as The Beast is all over them. My friends are beautiful. Really beautiful people, inside and out. I love them to the moon and am so honored that they stopped by to visit while on their “Southern road trip”.
My Chef brought over all the food he will prepare tomorrow. Yum.
I did nothing for most of the day. Don’t care either.
Lizzy - I love heavy draperies and could easily live in a hotel. In fact that is a dream.
I would like to live in a hotel suite with housekeeping daily, room service, restaurant downstairs, gym, pool, few possessions, laundry service. Oh yes, count me in! Probably cheaper than owning a home and paying all the upkeep and such. Well, as long as it is not a 5 star hotel anyway. I sure can’t pay $500 a night. But, if I could. I would be in a penthouse.
I forgot to eat today. That hasn’t happened for a bit. Oh too bad. Fasting is good for us.
Almost have the dog hair under control. I am shocked that he isn’t as bald as a billiards ball by now.
Lizzy, I hope all goes very well and that you aren’t too upset about this sale. You had to do it, but aren’t you glad you had it? Very few people in the world have vacation homes in other countries. You were blessed.
29 weeks. Over half a year. Seems like yesterday. I still can not wrap my head around the fact that my husband is never coming back to me in this lifetime. It is too brutal to accept. I still expect him to walk into the room at any moment.
We were together a little over 25 years, both retired the whole time and we were together 24/7/365. It is lonely here without my husband. I keep waiting for him to come home as if he just went fishing.
Aw poo.
Love to all.
Hi Peaches. They arrived a day earlier than expected! Mary would have gone potty! She’d have been running around like a headless chicken! It sounds like you managed ok with that though. Mary was so often late or doing things up to and even past the last minute that it became a standing joke. We always said she’d be late for her own funeral, but we made sure she wasn’t by taking her into the church the night before. We fixed that one at least!
So the big dinner is coming! I really hope you have a fantastic time and what a brilliant idea to have your own chef - who’s doing the washing up though? When I was young, my girlfriend at the time and I used to do the washing up for parties and dinners to earn a bit of pocket money. We did that because her father wouldn’t let us do babysitting together. Can’t think why not?
Hope you’re actually asleep now so have a good day.
Nigel xxxx
Hoping everything goes well for you today. We will all be thinking of you x
Hope everything goes well today and it will be difficult, dont hold the emotions in, your family will understand
Peaches i often pretend my husband has gone to a football match or to play tennis and like you I expect him to walk back in perhaps i’m going mad. Enjoy your friends company x lizzy stay strong it will be a difficult day for you xx
Good morning everybody.
Lizzy good luck today. You will get through this with the help of your fantastic family. You are so lucky to have them.
Peaches good luck with your dinner. I wish we could all come but we will be with you in spirit.
I have a photo of my husband by the bed. I find that if I talk to it I cry. Instead I still write my journal telling him about my day.
This morning I nearly made two cups of tea. Oops.
I have my induction at the visitor centre at 10am. Luckily a friend messaged me last night asking about it as I had forgotten. For some reason my brain has become really foggy again. I even dreamt the other night that I was doing silly things and I was worrying that I might have dementia.
Georgi thoughts are with you for your grandson. You don’t need more tragedy. Its terrible that you can’t just trust your doctors to do the right thing instead of whats chespest.
Dave has been quiet I hope he is ok.
Well I hope you all have a good day. Dull here this morning.
I still get through the day hour by hour and cant keep a thought in my head.
Hope you dinner party goes well and if your guests want to help with anything in your house, let them x
Bararap I imagine he is walking besides me at times. I have also got into the habit of talking to myself which I really must stop as I’m likely to get locked up.
Debsie, Mary talked to herself constantly, she read emails out loud etc. so carry on - you’re fine!
Hello Peaches
I hope you have a wonderful time with your friends.
I also think that my husband will appear, we were also together all of the time, we loved each others company.
Poo, sums it up perfectly
Sending love xx
Goodmorning all .how are we all today. I am not bad. Not a very good sleep .could not close down.
Looks a sunny day again try and get out today xxx
Good morning Dave. I’m not bad today, already fixed my grandson’s pool cue - hopefully - and it’s nice and sunny so might do the grass, but have to stop at noon due to noise requirements! Already 10:30 here!