I live in an old creaky house. I know it isn’t anyone. I have 4 dogs who bark if someone is 100 meters away. I keep thinking I can hear dripping. I can’t find anything. My mind is playing tricks on me. I don’t like living alone. I have had my 2 younger dogs neutered this week. They are doing well. I keep checking though. I managed better before the Winter. Roll on Springtime. Hugs everyone
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Georgi - I agree some music makes me cry but others will get me dancing and some take me right back. Back to when we were teenagers and newly in love. I am currently going through all my CD’s. Adding songs to my streaming account, songs I had forgotten about. I am really enjoying doing it. As John Miles said - music was my first love, it can be so powerful. Both my husband and I loved our music, we went to many gigs and even Glastonbury a couple of times - they have become great memories which I really treasure now.
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Good afternoon everyone, I’ve been very busy this morning, I’ve been in the man cave garage all morning. I actually felt some comfort being in there. My hands are blue with the cold and had gloves on. I sold four chain saws, spare chains, oil and 2 stroke and even a chain sharpener which I broke a tiny bit off it trying to unscrew it off a table. He was my sisters step son in law if that’s the right thing to call him. Really nice man, he has just bought a farm and needs to take trees down urgently, told him I didn’t know if they all worked apart from the newest one but he took the lot of them. Job done. I filled a bin bag with old jumpers and things that were covered in sawdust. Filled a bag of wood for the fire and fixed my back door with some WD40. I feel better for starting it but still a long way to go. Now I need to look at the documents that I need to make sure I take everything with me next week. This will bring me back down to earth with a bump. I cringe at all this paperwork but I need to do it. It’s so quiet where I live that if I hear anything I’m up investigating it, I look at all my cameras on the Ring doorbell. It’s usually a fox or cat that sets them off during the night. Think I need to spend at least an hour in the man cave every day from now on. It’s still frosty all around but we are at 5 degrees just now, wow almost a heatwave for Scotland lol.
I think the reason I cry in the car is that I listen to Smooth radio as it’s easy listening music they play, the music gets to me but I need to keep it on. My husband hated music on in the car, he said it distracted my concentration, he knew I hated driving but I had to as he had couldn’t drive due to medical reasons. He talked to me to keep me calm and he was like a living satnav as he knew my sense of direction was zero. Music actually makes it bearable being In the car now, just need to find a new station to listen to. Still haven’t went out to see if the car will start as it’s been sitting for weeks now in this cold weather. That’s for another day. Hope everyone having a reasonably good day, I still hate weekends, I hope that changes in the future. Hugs to all 
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Yeh I agree roll on spring, I’m fed up of the long dark nights xx
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Debsie myself and hubby had totally different tastes in music, when we first started dating I loved Bay City Rollers, Rod Stewart, Mud whereas he liked David Bowie, Rolling stones etc !
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Georgi, the first thing I do when I get up is put the tv on, I can’t stand the silence in the house, I was never up first and tv was always on. If I got up in the middle of the night I would find my husband listening to the pipes, he loved that. I had the pipes playing at his funeral, omg that was so hard to cope with. He has loads of CDs that he played, if I hear pipes playing now I wouldn’t cope, thinks that why I went to bed at the Bells.
I am still trying to thicken my hair with products before I bring my lovely wigs out the cupboard. The second wig I bought was so comfortable, much better than the first. I didn’t feel it on, no itching, it was more expensive but worth it. It kept my head warm in winter as well but the feeling when your hair grows back in is amazing… I’m sure it’s all the stress we are under having an effect on our hair. Fingers crossed it will rectify itself. Xxx
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Lizzy I hope so cause I know I couldn’t cope with a wig, Id just need to go bald lol xx
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I have realised how bad weekends are now i use to love them spending time with my wife now she has gone im all alone
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I find the weekends worse because i volunteer 4.days a week.these dark wintery days are horrible
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Georgi I’m with your husband - loved David Bowie and the Rolling Stones, although the Bay City Rollers make me smile remembering my youth. Always hated Rod Stewart, my friend loved him and I couldn’t understand why.
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That’s great news about the tools Lizzy!
Strange day yesterday - started off full of energy and quite happy, so much so that I didn’t even cry at the graveside! But something just hit me like a sledgehammer (yes I do have one at each house before you ask!) and I was in floods. Not sure why as I’d only been tidying up bedding and material in the back spare bedroom. My two darling daughters came round to help clear the front bedroom which was like a tip after all the time I spent looking for Mary’s burial outfit - a Franciscan Habit - and all the things from cupboards and drawers were still in piles on the floor. Even more bedding! We had a big family hug together. They helped tidy everything into sensible places and even dusted and vacuumed the room. Cheered me up no end to have a tidy room! Then awake at 4:00 this morning!
Hope you’re all doing okay? M xxx
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Well done Lizzy for getting motivated. I took my husbands car out today. Told myself to be brave. Took some parcels to the post office, popped round to see my granddaughter then popped into town to take some stuff to the charity shops. I chose today as I knew it would be quiet. I have spent the rest of the day sorting out old CDs and listening to the radio. The radio is on all day - I turn the tv on at tea time. I listen to Radio 2 or Virgin Anthems. I stream my music to sleep to. January is horrid and a weekend in January is the worse. Meeting some friends tomorrow. Something to look forward too. I think one of my friends is having a tough time so I hope the focus will be on her instead of me.
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Marnee we never know how our day is going. Im so glad you have family close to you, I would love that. I’m sitting here looking at these documents to be filled in and it’s freaking me out, I’m texting and doing everything I can to avoid doing it. It’s the one thing that I can’t cope with. I hate it. I know the sooner I do it the better but I’m stalling. I was thinking about you when I was in the man cave garage, I laughed at a few things and wondered if you had some of this stuff. I bet you had. I was trying to find the battery that connected the Bosch sander to the charger, why would it not be in the machine or in the charger. I googled what I was looking for but it’s nowhere to be seen. Will try again tomorrow, found an electric one but it’s more powerful than this cordless Bosch. I am hoping to sand out big lumps on the wall in one of the bedrooms as it’s awful. Ive decided to decorate this room as it’s the only room I hate, when I sell the house I need it to be perfect. Whoever plastered this room should be shot. Maybe I should go and eat somthing, not had much today then I might look at the paperwork or I might leave it till tomorrow??? Take care, be nice to yourself xxx
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Debsie well done ! you drove the car and got parked, thats an achievement in itself. I’m proud of you. I hope you felt good after doing that. My motivation has dropped down a few gears after my good morning, always tomorrow, hope you have a nice day tomorrow xxx
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Good morning Darlings! 
Can I offer you all a virtual cup of tea as I drink my New Orleans coffee and chicory?
Those bumps in the night are nothing. Just house creaks. But, if you are very nervous about sleeping alone in the house, here is what I did when young and on my own: slide a dresser against your bedroom door. Even should the boogey man get in to the house, he can’t get into your bedroom.
Lizzy, you should start the car and let it run a bit every day. The battery may die sitting in the cold for so long. Yay on selling those chain saws! Good job!
3 am is the witching hour, or so it is called. Nietchze wrote of the 3am troubles in “Thus Spoke Zarathustra” (spelling may be off). When you wake, pray. Cloistered Catholic nuns and priests wake for prayer at that time as do Muslims; it must be a universal, spiritual, call to prayer.
Shredded the last of the papers. Cleared and organized the closet where I keep the holiday decor and put all the Christmas stuff away. 
Gathered all the garbage and into the bin it went. My desk in cleared off! My new sink will arrive Monday!
Now to shop for a new faucet.
Today, I will take all the things that must leave but are lining the 3rd floor hall, down to the 1st floor. It will clog up the foyer, but it won’t be in my way.
When I get one room cleared and cleaned, I tend to go look at it periodically to see my accomplishment. Do y’all do that? Nothing gives me such pleasure as admiring my handiwork. 
Thrilling life, don’t be jealous.
The Beast is an incredible boy. No matter where he is in the house, he senses exactly when I open my eyes and comes running to jump in bed. The telephone has the same sense as it rings before I can stumble downstairs.
Changed the beneficiaries on my annuities and sent more information to a policy provider for the name change.
Grocery today. Maybe I will go to the big box store and buy some bulk items. Both cars could use a run through the carwash too. I have to practice pulling my husband’s giant SUV into the carport which was built for giant cars. My husband could to it, but he could also park an oil tanker next to a dock without smashing it.
We are headed into the Mardi Gras season. All the decorations are being put out, so I’ll hang my purple green and gold comedy/tragedy door wreath to show some festive spirit.
The constant headache I’ve suffered since my husband died has finally gone away.
The Beast needs a shower. Maybe today.
Life keeps moving along, doesn’t it.
Ladies, if you don’t want to sit in the salon for hours, I get it. Maybe try some box color. When young and broke, I did my own color and no one knew any different. Besides, no one cares what you look like, they only care what they look like. Truth.
I am the oddball here, I have always preferred the company of myself and liked being alone. I lived alone for 22 years, so it is not new to me and I am reverting back to those days. Almost like the last 25 years were a dream.
Love to all.
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Peaches I do like time alone, but I don’t like to do things by myself. I loved it when my husband was out, or even in the bath. He never stopped me doing anything but the house to myself always felt special. I was never a people person. Verging on antisocial. I married 11 days after my 20th birthday and was living at my parents so have never lived alone before. I’m not sure how I will get on. Time will tell. I have done a lot of clearing but can’t say it’s obvious. Had enough of that for the time being. Going to take a break and do things I enjoy instead.
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Wise words as always, my husband was happy in his own company too, not me, I love company and I’m hating living alone, but thats life and I will have to get used to it I guess! Had my 2 youngest grandsons for a couple of hrs this afternoon so my son could go to the gym as his partner was working today so that filled my time this afternoon!
Tomorrow I need to go get some shopping Ive not been out since Tues cause of the flu bug Ive had had it floored me just left with a cough now and Ive run out of cough mixture as well as bread, milk is low too ! So needs must xx
Take care everyone xxx
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Debsie you sound like my husband he loved to have the house to himself too.
I get bored of my own company x
I got married at 18 and had never lived alone until now. We met in Jan I was 17, got engaged in the April on my 18th birthday and married the following January ( I have to add I was not pregnant, I think people think that when I tell them so I always add that bit)
Even that young when you know you’ve met the one you just know and 47 years married when he passed so proved the doubters wrong lol !
Take care everyone xx
PS Think I will have a wakeful night as this cough is annoying me 
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Georgi, I also hate being in the house myself, I need company, I’m starting to talk to myself which is not good. Took me ages to get to sleep but here I am 4.46am. Throat sore, need a drink but don’t want to get up. I hope your cough isn’t keeping you up, once you get that it takes ages to go away. I put honey and lemon in my tea, that helps me if could be bothered to get up. Well here goes back to my book, look after yourself xxx
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Georgi, so sorry you are still suffering a flu! Ick.
Made a list of 7 things to do and dang it I got them done!
Have bags of my clothes that no longer fit all ready to go - tomorrow. Yay!
My friends’ mom died this evening. Darling has been holding on for so long without food or water, it was devastating to her daughters. There is sadness and relief now. Mom is gone, but no longer suffering. The girls are exhausted having been on death watch at her side for 17 days non-stop. It is sad as she is the last of our parents, in fact, of all the parents that I knew growing up, that generation is gone. We are the old ones now. Bwah!
Made split pea soup. Yummy in this cold, wet, weather. Raining all night and day.
Parked the giant SUV in the carport! I wrote earlier that the carport was built for giant cars, my mistake - it was not - at all. My husband made me so nervous when I tried, he would rush out of the house and shout directions to me. So I would leave it in the drive and let him do it later. I guess he really thought I was a doofus. For Pete’s sake I was his lawyer - that is how we met. He came to me for some very complex maritime litigation and, of course, I won. But, ship Captain that he was, he was always supervising me and barking orders. Ha! It was like water off a duck’s back, I am a tough cookie, never intimidated, never embarrassed, and stopped blushing or getting hurt feelings decades ago. He met his match. 
The Beast ate a bra today. Cleaned the pantry and Stray Cat is now kenneled - perhaps for the rest of her life. I have had cats my whole life but never one that refused to use a litter pan covered or not. Laundered sheets and pet towels, most of the hall stuff is on the first floor, garbage out to bin, vacuumed the 1st and 2d floor with the robots - I love them.
Took a chill pill.
The fires in California are still burning. Lots of ritzy homes as it was a very posh area. Insurance companies are going to raise rates all over the country now to make up for the losses there. It is all the fault of poor management by a short sighted elected officials who cut the state fire department budget by $110 million dollars, allowed the reservoirs to be depleted for the smelt, refused to clear forest underbrush or cut fire lanes for. . .the environment.
I hope there is a class action lawsuit… Good news? The smelt are saved. SMDH.
Okay, everyone suffering sore throats - gargle with warm salt water. And, y’all, stop drinking tea and hot chocolate before bed - caffeine.
Am I going to have to cross the pond and straighten up everyone? 
Does anyone want a cat? She comes with food, a kennel, bowls and my everlasting appreciation.
Much love.
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